Friday
I wish I could atleast pretend.
Fake my disappointment. Pretend I'm unaware I set my own self up. By wishing for things in my dreamworld. For absorbing myself too deeply into the stories I read and the paintings I wish I could create. And the pictures I'm too afraid to stage. And the poetic phrases that I create in my mind but can never piece together with more.
I can't escape my feelings of longing for the love that only exists in society's sick entertainment...
He drives me crazy and I don't want him... but without him I'm miserable. And when I'm by myself I can't separate the thoughts of my own past and my own life from my thoughts of other peoples lives and sad stories. Then I try to forget that I should.
Why should I?
All of it creates tears.
[do you know what this is?]
[it's my heart.
it's my heart, and it's broken.
can you feel it?]
Fake my disappointment. Pretend I'm unaware I set my own self up. By wishing for things in my dreamworld. For absorbing myself too deeply into the stories I read and the paintings I wish I could create. And the pictures I'm too afraid to stage. And the poetic phrases that I create in my mind but can never piece together with more.
I can't escape my feelings of longing for the love that only exists in society's sick entertainment...
He drives me crazy and I don't want him... but without him I'm miserable. And when I'm by myself I can't separate the thoughts of my own past and my own life from my thoughts of other peoples lives and sad stories. Then I try to forget that I should.
Why should I?
All of it creates tears.
[do you know what this is?]
[it's my heart.
it's my heart, and it's broken.
can you feel it?]