(no subject)

Nov 02, 2010 20:57

When the crap hit the fan, my ego took a real hit. Despite my foray into "f-buddies" and friends "with" last fall, I wasn't ready to date. So now that I'm ready, and I've started doing so, I find myself turning into someone I don't like. A little paranoid, suspicious, anxious, over analyzing everything with only negative results. Not about the guy(s) I'm seeing and their potential to pull similar crap, but all insecurity based. Sometimes I hate the Internet and the knowledge it let's me have. Knowing someone is logged into a site makes me think they are cruising someone else. Logged into chat but not chatting with me? Obviously chatting up someone else. These things shouldn't matter, and it's twisted and immature of me to think that way. I'm not looking for the info, it's just there. My actions are easy enough to control, it's my reactions that are causing problems.
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