Hmmmmm
So I've been invited to a very fancy dinner (fancy, as in posh frocks and tuxedos) and I don't know whether to go or not. It's an annual dinner held by my ex-employers and in past years I've had to work at it - setting up microphones, organising the video-taping of the speeches etc. so I know what this event is like - stuffy and formal and attended by so many surgeons it's amazing all the egos can fit in one room. When I got the invite, I immediately thought 'I'd rather have pins stuck in my eyes than go to that' - then I saw who was giving the after-dinner speech - Kofi Annan. I think I want to hear Kofi.
So, back to the stupid dinner - if I decide to go, I have to buy a frock. I don't really do frocks - especially the posh sort that I'd have to purchase for this gig. And it would probably set me back a couple of hundred euro at least, which, considering I'm unemployed now, is a bit extravagant.
And I'd have to lose 2 stone in the next 3 weeks, which might be a bit difficult.
And I'd have to bring a 'guest'. Finding a single-man in Dublin that I'd be willing to bring to this bunfight would be more difficult than losing 2 stone in 3 weeks. So I think I'm going to have to fly one in from the UK. I spoke to my friend Ian this morning and, if he's free that week-end, he 's going to fly over from Cardiff and escort me (both of us cackled with laughter at the mere thought of him being an 'escort' - big flaming queen, that he is). Part of me thinks, this smacks of 'hiring a homosexual for the evening' a la Taylor Townsend (one for fans of The OC) despite the fact that A. I won't be paying him, and B. I won't be pretending he's my boyfriend, but another part of me thinks, he's the perfect person to bring. He's great fun, very good-looking, already owns a tux, and he's a consultant physician so they can't look down their noses at him. But the best thing (because I'm so childish) is, they'll probably be scandalised at his very obvious homosexuality (yes - they really are those sort of dicks).
I'll have to wait and see if he's free that week-end, and make my decision then (and start dieting immediately, just in case). Because I really do think I want to hear Kofi.
So, back to the stupid dinner - if I decide to go, I have to buy a frock. I don't really do frocks - especially the posh sort that I'd have to purchase for this gig. And it would probably set me back a couple of hundred euro at least, which, considering I'm unemployed now, is a bit extravagant.
And I'd have to lose 2 stone in the next 3 weeks, which might be a bit difficult.
And I'd have to bring a 'guest'. Finding a single-man in Dublin that I'd be willing to bring to this bunfight would be more difficult than losing 2 stone in 3 weeks. So I think I'm going to have to fly one in from the UK. I spoke to my friend Ian this morning and, if he's free that week-end, he 's going to fly over from Cardiff and escort me (both of us cackled with laughter at the mere thought of him being an 'escort' - big flaming queen, that he is). Part of me thinks, this smacks of 'hiring a homosexual for the evening' a la Taylor Townsend (one for fans of The OC) despite the fact that A. I won't be paying him, and B. I won't be pretending he's my boyfriend, but another part of me thinks, he's the perfect person to bring. He's great fun, very good-looking, already owns a tux, and he's a consultant physician so they can't look down their noses at him. But the best thing (because I'm so childish) is, they'll probably be scandalised at his very obvious homosexuality (yes - they really are those sort of dicks).
I'll have to wait and see if he's free that week-end, and make my decision then (and start dieting immediately, just in case). Because I really do think I want to hear Kofi.