on the edge
i really don't know how to start this. today i might have lost the closest person to me in my entire life. what i did should probobly not be forgiven, but i am writing this in hopes of changing some one's mind on how they feel about me. today amye called and asked if i wanted to come over for dinner, i lied and said no bc i didn't want to leave ilia home alone. but the truth is that i didn't want to go any where. about 15 20 min later jay called and asked if i wanted to go the gym, yeah the gym... fucking stupid. any way... when i was at the gym amye stopped by and i wasn't there. so i went and talked to amye... after every thing she said i really don't know why she is still with me.. i am on the edge of loosing one of the most important people in my life, and there is nothing i can do.. she has every right to brake up with me... and deeep down inside i feel like it going to happen.. i would give my life to take this day back... even if she does forgive me, this will still be there, will she ever trust me again? i dunno.. if any body reads this please please don't feel bad for me.. do me a favor hate me... last time i cried was when my parents split up.. not any more... i have more to say but i can't write any more.. if u have any ideas on how i could fix this... please let me know... amye i know u don't believe this. but i love u more than anything in the world. i am soooo sorry i did this... do what ur heart tells u.. no matter how it affects me...