Fic: Changelings by Pandafoot105

[shaggydog_mod]

Title: Changelings
Username: pandafoot105
Art: Quick Bright Things by tortugax
Word Count: 64,081
Rating: [R]
Contains: *mild sexual situations, some gore, much swearing, bad Welsh*
Summary: Before they were Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, before they formed Hogwarts’ own unofficial Werewolf pack, before they became the youngest Animagi ever unknown, and

Comments

[brighty18]

I have so much love for this I cannot even express it in words. Siriusly. I’ve no words. But I will try. I actually felt that way about the art the first time I saw it, too, and your beautiful story does it great justice. There was just so much to love about this. It read like a novel (or, I guess, a novella) in that it was full of subtle and beautiful details that traditional (and usually shorter) fanfic often glosses over. We felt everyone here and you wove such lovely images of all of them. You made them real and I honestly felt like I know these boys even better than before. Greengrass just sees a pack of fidgety twelve-year-olds. He doesn’t know how they are tied together, how James saves Sirius from himself and Remus from his loneliness, and Sirius makes them all feel alive and gives James purpose and Peter keeps them all from just going mad. That may be one of the best descriptions of their relationship I’ve ever read.

You spent so much time with the details, and I loved the way that you did not compress time, but leisurely explored each moment of their young lives in gorgeous detail. And the details were, indeed gorgeous. For example, the light motif was utterly marvelous and wove a delightful, golden thread through the tapestry of the whole piece. From the lights of Soho in the beginning ( Sirius really, firmly believes that even if the world goes black and the seas boil and everyone falls to insanity, the lights of Soho will never go out.) to the firefly imagery ( “They’re so different from stars. Stars are distant and dead and don’t care. Fireflies are alive. They breathe. Eventually they die. I always liked that much better.”) and even the lighter - it worked on many levels. Of course, Sirius would crave light and fear the darkness. We see that in him so many ways in this incredible story.

The dying motif was equally brilliant. That Sirius would immediately assume that Remus was dying was extremely poignant. He could never deal with loss well. And making Remus promise to live until 1981 just about killed me. Oh, and that was a great use of foreshadowing there, too.

One aspect that really got me was Remus’ struggle with his friends knowing that he was a werewolf. It was so much deeper than mere fear, there was an actual need for them to know. It’s more complicated than just that, he thinks. Remus doesn’t want them to see him as a Dark Creature. He doesn’t want them to have to witness it. But he’ll never believe that they’ve truly accepted him if they’ve never seen him at his worst.And that he actually TOLD them? That was beyond brilliant. It makes perfect sense, too. He was very strong in this story - much as he is in my head. His fears were very real but felt complex and far from cliché. He is so strong in canon. Yes, he is secretive, but it would be very much like him to want to tell and to want to be accepted fully for what he is. Remus hated pity, does he not.

Sirius, though, and his relationship with his horrible family, became a centerpiece of this story for me. From there very beginning with his obsession with SoHo (and later with the little gifts he’d give Remus) he was endearing on a whole new level to me. You captured the complexity of his situation well, and I loved the way you so cleverly used Andromeda to flesh out the things that Sirius would never say himself. And this image really got to me: Sirius looks like a real wizard. Sirius looks like magic incarnate, born into the form of a thirteen-year-old boy. It was like how he could not take off the ring or write letters or escape from the basement. He was so trapped and yet so far above them. I found myself waiting with baited breath for the actual moment that he would leave and be free.

[brighty18]

You used magic brilliantly, too. The Animagus thing made particular sense in this story. Bits like James accidentally Apparating and making friends with deer or Peter shirking his liver to the size of pin were funny and yet cleverly illustrated what they were down deep inside. Sirius’ situation was the best. The way his attitude about dogs (from this: “Do you know what dogs do, James? They’re owned. They’re slaves to their fucking masters, they’re kicked in the dirt, and they’re kept on a leash. Fuck this.” He slashes his wand through the air and the patronus dissipates. James and Peter shuffle their feet. Sirius’s body quakes. So angry, so angry, so much rage at all that his family does and stands for and he is their dog, burn it all. to that beautiful scene at the end when he transformed to meet the Wolf) echoed his other inner journey perfectly. It was like that bit about Kafka. Sirius learned to overcome his family, not to be a lap dog, but a strong, powerful creature who lives for his pack.

There were such lovely bits of humor here, too. Particularly in how things appear to Sirius. Squashes that look like lepers, cupids that look like baby!Peeves. It’s lovely to see Sirius so creative and with a sense of humor. “He has a point,” adds Remus. Sirius had thought he’d gone to sleep, but apparently a Moony can’t resist an academic debate, no matter how stuffed with chocolate éclairs that Moony happens to be. That just made me laugh.

Equally fantastic was the way in which you developed their relationship. It as almost secondary to the rest of the multiple plots, but that made it even more delicious. It felt very real, as love emerging from friendship should. The weather gets wet, then hot. It’s like living in a fever. He sleeps a lot. Sirius never sleeps, but Sirius is always there. There are always hands on his arm, on his back, on his neck. It must look strange, even to James and Peter, but Remus can’t remember them saying anything about it. to It doesn’t feel like it’s the first time they’ve done it. It feels like they’ve been kissing for years without ever realizing it. How stupid of them not to realize and just go ahead and do it for real. Sirius’s hands come up to Remus’s neck, tugging, asking. Guh! Beautiful, but also very real in my mind.

I also thought the title was genius. You referred to it nicely in Remus' comment about Nymphadora's name, but, really that was what both boys were. Remus, of course, in terms of being a wolf, but Sirius was the ultimate changeling in many ways, for he truly did not belong to his family.

Oh, and not for nothing, this was one of my favorite passages: Remus laughs, laughs so hard he could be sick, and even if he was that might be funny too. He has to grip the dining table to keep himself standing and it rocks under his weight. Thank the stars for Sirius Black! None of them are perfect wizards, all of them must be a little insane, and Sirius can just walk into his tiny, meagre little life and kick Remus awake. He makes Remus remember that he is not a timid little boy anymore, and that he never really was, deep down It pretty much defines their relationship perfectly.

Okay, I’ll stop rambling now. I guess I did have words after all. LOL. REc'd here: .http://brighty18.livejournal.com/652817.html