Captain Bimbo's Diary (original+unfinished)
Captain Bimbo's Diary
Written for Mass Comm. within my last months of senior year. I attempted to edit it and finish it recently, but I couldn't quite bring myself to yet. I WANT to, because Captain Bimbo is fun to write. xDDD
Unfinished?
RATING: G
CHARACTERS: Captain Bimbo, the Gothic Aliens
CLAIMER: These are my characters, my locales, my writing and story, etc. Please do not use ANY of them without my permission first. KThnxBai.
NOTES: Don't expect this to be finished anytime soon. LOL
Captain Bimbo's Diary (Insert Date Here)
I found the worst planet. EVER. No, I'm completely, utterly serious. It all started when I discovered this huge, black sphere thingy. The radars picked it up as a fellow ship, which is so totally weird. I had one of the guys try sending a signal, and the orb was like "no way, man, stay the HELL away" and we were like, "we just want to be your friend forever" and THEN the connection died, so I ordered the ship to be stopped so that I could explore and stuff.
Man, was that planet UGLY. I almost killed myself when I lost half of one of my favorite pair of go-go boots to the ocean at the beach. It wasn't like one of those Earth beaches where you can tan and pick up guys either. It was DISGUSTING-instead of water, there was something like quick sand, combined with tar and cement that smell like dirty gym socks.
I TOLD you it was icky.
After spending at least two hours mourning over the loss of my beloved go-go boot, I found out that, YEAH, get this: there was coconut scented oxygen. Delish! This planet had awesome taste in scents (well, not the quick-tar-sand stuff, but otherwise…). Best of all, I could breathe. It felt like mint going through my nose and even freshened my breath. It helped after drinking beer and eating that sardine platter for lunch…and I had ONE spicy French fry.
I am never splurging on that many excess calories AGAIN.
That's why I was lucky to find out that these aliens there had trampolines!
WHEE!
I jumped on one of them for a really long time, then one of the guys over the radio was getting REALLY mad at me. Something about gravy or something sounding like that.
I don't know why. Despite my, erm, problems with the aliens, I am here writing with my favorite pink poofy pen. Isn't it CUTE? I bought it from the most adorable merchant. He had the biggest eyes and the fluffiest ears…
Oh, wait, where was I again?
Oh, yeah, the ALIENS!
They were very mean. One of them caught me jumping on her trampoline. As far as aliens go, she was pretty normal looking. You know, green skin-VERY PALE, must have been part albino or goth-lack of ears, really small eyes and as tall as my cousin after she passed through a shrink ray and back (not good, I tell you, she went from six feet down to four feet tall). She was dressed like she was going to a heavy metal concert on crack. I didn't even know that heavy metal fans existed this far out of Earth!
What the hell man? Why can't I meet people like ME?
(... to be continued?)
Written for Mass Comm. within my last months of senior year. I attempted to edit it and finish it recently, but I couldn't quite bring myself to yet. I WANT to, because Captain Bimbo is fun to write. xDDD
Unfinished?
RATING: G
CHARACTERS: Captain Bimbo, the Gothic Aliens
CLAIMER: These are my characters, my locales, my writing and story, etc. Please do not use ANY of them without my permission first. KThnxBai.
NOTES: Don't expect this to be finished anytime soon. LOL
Captain Bimbo's Diary (Insert Date Here)
I found the worst planet. EVER. No, I'm completely, utterly serious. It all started when I discovered this huge, black sphere thingy. The radars picked it up as a fellow ship, which is so totally weird. I had one of the guys try sending a signal, and the orb was like "no way, man, stay the HELL away" and we were like, "we just want to be your friend forever" and THEN the connection died, so I ordered the ship to be stopped so that I could explore and stuff.
Man, was that planet UGLY. I almost killed myself when I lost half of one of my favorite pair of go-go boots to the ocean at the beach. It wasn't like one of those Earth beaches where you can tan and pick up guys either. It was DISGUSTING-instead of water, there was something like quick sand, combined with tar and cement that smell like dirty gym socks.
I TOLD you it was icky.
After spending at least two hours mourning over the loss of my beloved go-go boot, I found out that, YEAH, get this: there was coconut scented oxygen. Delish! This planet had awesome taste in scents (well, not the quick-tar-sand stuff, but otherwise…). Best of all, I could breathe. It felt like mint going through my nose and even freshened my breath. It helped after drinking beer and eating that sardine platter for lunch…and I had ONE spicy French fry.
I am never splurging on that many excess calories AGAIN.
That's why I was lucky to find out that these aliens there had trampolines!
WHEE!
I jumped on one of them for a really long time, then one of the guys over the radio was getting REALLY mad at me. Something about gravy or something sounding like that.
I don't know why. Despite my, erm, problems with the aliens, I am here writing with my favorite pink poofy pen. Isn't it CUTE? I bought it from the most adorable merchant. He had the biggest eyes and the fluffiest ears…
Oh, wait, where was I again?
Oh, yeah, the ALIENS!
They were very mean. One of them caught me jumping on her trampoline. As far as aliens go, she was pretty normal looking. You know, green skin-VERY PALE, must have been part albino or goth-lack of ears, really small eyes and as tall as my cousin after she passed through a shrink ray and back (not good, I tell you, she went from six feet down to four feet tall). She was dressed like she was going to a heavy metal concert on crack. I didn't even know that heavy metal fans existed this far out of Earth!
What the hell man? Why can't I meet people like ME?
(... to be continued?)