Can barely deal with life.
Life has gotten out of control & I feel like I'm drowning. My sister is pregnant & staying with the father even though he cheated on her while she was prego oh & on top of that they get into a fight he leaves then his family throws her out......they throw a pregnant woman on the street. He begs her to come back she does they dont apoligize for the way they treat her.
My relationship *sighs* IDK where to start with it. We have been up & down & mostly fight for the past 3yrs but we stay together. I nearly left him a few years ago for another guy who treated me better but in the end I stayed. I ...... I really am not aure why I stay sometimes...... he can be emotionally & verbally abusive but I'm just as guilty of treating him the same. I'm so tired & overworked taking care of someone who doesnt have any clue how to comfort me with words & honestly actions only do so much. I slept with someone else & feel guilty not because I did but because I don't feel guilty for looking for affection in someone else. I have no idea what I am doing anymore. If I leave this relationship I don't know what I will do because I have given him almost 14yrs of my life.
I know my mom will blame me she always blames me for our problems. How sad is it to know she cares more for him than me? I shouldn't be surprised my mom even has fav children & I sadly don't make them cut. I love her but hey I can only take being called the smart one & reminded how much prettier & skinnier my sister is for so long. She only loves me when her & my sister or my bro are fighting. My youngest bro, sister & I always compare how ignored we are. *sigh* I feel so unloved, underappreciated, lonely, & depressed right now. If I didn't work so much I would probably drown my sorrows in alcohol.
Anyone reading this sorry for being so depressing but Ineeded to get it out before well IDK. I hope things will get better but right now it doesn't feel that way.
My relationship *sighs* IDK where to start with it. We have been up & down & mostly fight for the past 3yrs but we stay together. I nearly left him a few years ago for another guy who treated me better but in the end I stayed. I ...... I really am not aure why I stay sometimes...... he can be emotionally & verbally abusive but I'm just as guilty of treating him the same. I'm so tired & overworked taking care of someone who doesnt have any clue how to comfort me with words & honestly actions only do so much. I slept with someone else & feel guilty not because I did but because I don't feel guilty for looking for affection in someone else. I have no idea what I am doing anymore. If I leave this relationship I don't know what I will do because I have given him almost 14yrs of my life.
I know my mom will blame me she always blames me for our problems. How sad is it to know she cares more for him than me? I shouldn't be surprised my mom even has fav children & I sadly don't make them cut. I love her but hey I can only take being called the smart one & reminded how much prettier & skinnier my sister is for so long. She only loves me when her & my sister or my bro are fighting. My youngest bro, sister & I always compare how ignored we are. *sigh* I feel so unloved, underappreciated, lonely, & depressed right now. If I didn't work so much I would probably drown my sorrows in alcohol.
Anyone reading this sorry for being so depressing but Ineeded to get it out before well IDK. I hope things will get better but right now it doesn't feel that way.