Random Thoughts
There is far too much in my head.
1. The divorce paperwork was mailed out on Saturday. The lawyer's assistant called me this morning. I need to pay $453 before they'll file it. I have no clue where I'm going to get this. I only have to pay half as Lynn has agreed to pay the other half but finding half is freaking me out.
2. The day battle is coming up and there's so much left to do about it. 3 weeks out and ... some people are attempting to stir the pot to cause problems by spreading rumors and talking crap behind Jon's back. I want to end it by just punching the problem starter in the face, or the nuts, either one ... maybe both.
3. I need to start the work for my new overdress .. and that involves cleaning so I have room. The clothing on the floor and in the suitcase were dealt with last night. Tonight I need to clear off the card table where the sewing machine is so I can use it. The plan is to star the cutting and sew it as I cut it, rather than cutting everything and having it spread out while I sew it.
4. I need to sew the herald tabards for our battle day. They're easy, it's just time. Well, and steaming my fingers as I try to make the trim. I bought a trim maker and couldn't get it work at all. Waste of money.
5. $453 for a divorce. Holy crap. I might get some of that back if they don't have to do much work but that's not a promise. Groceries are occasionally a problem so I am really stressing over this.
6. Meanwhile .. we're spending so much on the day battle and there's still more to do and spend. December is coming up and all the costs involved with holidays. I still don't have a car and some of the jobs that Jon is looking at .. .my lack of car is limiting things, like the hours he can work. Plus the next camping / fighting event is in January. We need a tent, and I need a warm cloak, and gas and food and entrance, and missing a time at work.
7. I know it'll all work out, I'm just tired of struggling. Jon is wonderful and calms me down when I panic. Just, right now I look around at what needs to be done (vs what I want to do) and I feel so exhausted. Jon suggests breaking things down to smaller tasks and that just makes me feel overwhelmed at having a higher numer of things to work through. I want to just to sit on the couch and cuddle and ignore it all. I feel like I can't get ahead.
8. Despite all this whirling around in my head ... I'm still happy. I feel like I have a partner who is fully in this with me. He's working to find a job and hitting up everybody he knows about getting employed. He's doing all he can to make sure I know he loves me and wants me in his life. He does his best to take care of me and I trust him.
1. The divorce paperwork was mailed out on Saturday. The lawyer's assistant called me this morning. I need to pay $453 before they'll file it. I have no clue where I'm going to get this. I only have to pay half as Lynn has agreed to pay the other half but finding half is freaking me out.
2. The day battle is coming up and there's so much left to do about it. 3 weeks out and ... some people are attempting to stir the pot to cause problems by spreading rumors and talking crap behind Jon's back. I want to end it by just punching the problem starter in the face, or the nuts, either one ... maybe both.
3. I need to start the work for my new overdress .. and that involves cleaning so I have room. The clothing on the floor and in the suitcase were dealt with last night. Tonight I need to clear off the card table where the sewing machine is so I can use it. The plan is to star the cutting and sew it as I cut it, rather than cutting everything and having it spread out while I sew it.
4. I need to sew the herald tabards for our battle day. They're easy, it's just time. Well, and steaming my fingers as I try to make the trim. I bought a trim maker and couldn't get it work at all. Waste of money.
5. $453 for a divorce. Holy crap. I might get some of that back if they don't have to do much work but that's not a promise. Groceries are occasionally a problem so I am really stressing over this.
6. Meanwhile .. we're spending so much on the day battle and there's still more to do and spend. December is coming up and all the costs involved with holidays. I still don't have a car and some of the jobs that Jon is looking at .. .my lack of car is limiting things, like the hours he can work. Plus the next camping / fighting event is in January. We need a tent, and I need a warm cloak, and gas and food and entrance, and missing a time at work.
7. I know it'll all work out, I'm just tired of struggling. Jon is wonderful and calms me down when I panic. Just, right now I look around at what needs to be done (vs what I want to do) and I feel so exhausted. Jon suggests breaking things down to smaller tasks and that just makes me feel overwhelmed at having a higher numer of things to work through. I want to just to sit on the couch and cuddle and ignore it all. I feel like I can't get ahead.
8. Despite all this whirling around in my head ... I'm still happy. I feel like I have a partner who is fully in this with me. He's working to find a job and hitting up everybody he knows about getting employed. He's doing all he can to make sure I know he loves me and wants me in his life. He does his best to take care of me and I trust him.