(no subject)
It was a year ago two days ago that it "snowed" in Santa Cruz.
And it has been nearly 10 months since my last LJ entry, and since then I've only sporadically logged on. I just re-read some of my entries from March 2006, and this time last year I was engaged in philosophical debate with a long-haired black cat whom I loved but wasn't mine, and to whom I also regaled my woes about TA-crushing and People Power co-cooridnating (Hi Co-co!).
For some reason, I was scared of re-visiting my Livejournal. It takes a lot for me to re-read whatever I write. Whether they're about good memories or bad ones, they're always painful to read. If they're good, I get nostalgic. If they're bad, I'm melancholy for hours. I'm not much of a writer. Being a writer only means that I must one day re-read what I'd written. Unfortunately, I have a shoddy long-term memory recall at best, and a near-non-existent short term memory imprint, which leaves me to write down important things. And I know a function of making a journal entry is to write out how you felt at the time, get your emotions out, a form of catharsis, etc. The problem is that it does last. I don't know. Memories are supposed to be fleeting. It's their nature. And I'd better stop myself before this becomes another 4 a.m. rumination.
So I'll end it here. Let me know that you've read this. I miss you, whomever is reading, and I'm sorry I had not made more of an effort to see you/visit you. I haven't been a good friend, and it kills me. I can tell you what I've been up to; embarassingly, it's not much. But I will from now on make more of an effort to read my LJ Friends page, to see what you've been up to, how you've been doing. And I'll reply when I can.
For now, stay well, and hello again.
And it has been nearly 10 months since my last LJ entry, and since then I've only sporadically logged on. I just re-read some of my entries from March 2006, and this time last year I was engaged in philosophical debate with a long-haired black cat whom I loved but wasn't mine, and to whom I also regaled my woes about TA-crushing and People Power co-cooridnating (Hi Co-co!).
For some reason, I was scared of re-visiting my Livejournal. It takes a lot for me to re-read whatever I write. Whether they're about good memories or bad ones, they're always painful to read. If they're good, I get nostalgic. If they're bad, I'm melancholy for hours. I'm not much of a writer. Being a writer only means that I must one day re-read what I'd written. Unfortunately, I have a shoddy long-term memory recall at best, and a near-non-existent short term memory imprint, which leaves me to write down important things. And I know a function of making a journal entry is to write out how you felt at the time, get your emotions out, a form of catharsis, etc. The problem is that it does last. I don't know. Memories are supposed to be fleeting. It's their nature. And I'd better stop myself before this becomes another 4 a.m. rumination.
So I'll end it here. Let me know that you've read this. I miss you, whomever is reading, and I'm sorry I had not made more of an effort to see you/visit you. I haven't been a good friend, and it kills me. I can tell you what I've been up to; embarassingly, it's not much. But I will from now on make more of an effort to read my LJ Friends page, to see what you've been up to, how you've been doing. And I'll reply when I can.
For now, stay well, and hello again.