because of me talking to Jimmy so much, the other night [I believe] caused things to come to a head in our "relationship"...he told me things he thought I wanted to hear, things to make me stray, things to make me come to him...I called him on the phone, and I can't even begin to tell you why...all I know is that somehow during that short conversation, I started to really appreciate what I have here at home...namely being M.I.C.H.A.E.L...I love him so much, and yet I seem to do things that throw off the natural balance of my life...I really need to put an end to this, but I lack the courage of my convictions to actually go through with it...but I have been wrong before, and I think now is another of those times...
I even went to the lengths of telling Mike about it...talking to Jimmy...being seduced by him [if even just a little]...because of this, I am no longer able to see him in person, for fear the dreamed up scenarios might actually occur...that I might walk into the trap of one hedonistic being such as Jimmy...that I might no longer want Mike [which just can't happen because I love Mike too much]...if it weren't for the fact that I [somehow] actually feel threatened by Jimmy, I might be more upset about all this...I've lived like this before and I realized that it wasn't the way I chose to live the rest of my life...I'll keep my fantasies and leave them as such...fantasies and nothing more...
so in light of the delicious torment of all these current [and not so current] events, I give you my misery as spoken by muses not under my control...
The Delicious Torment of a Crush.
Yellowcard = Only One
Broken, this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason
I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you, so you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I'd let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one
Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone
And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I'd let go, but there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one
Here I go, so dishonestly
Leave a note, for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
Don't So let me go and you will find someone
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I'd let go, but there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one
Christina Aguilera = Walk Away
What do you do
When you know something's bad for you
And you still can't let go
...
I was prey in your bed
And devoured completely
...
it hurts my soul
'Cause I can't let go
...
I keep going right back
To the one thing that I need
To walk away from
---
I'm addicted to your allure
And I'm fiending for a cure
Every step I take
Leads to one mistake
I keep going right back
...
I can't mend
This torn state I'm in
Getting nothing in return
What did I do to deserve
The pain of this slow burn
...
only thing I need to do
is walk away from you
Sugarcult = Pretty Girl
Pretty girl is suffering, while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out what his intentions were about
That's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head
It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love
...
Her killer instinct tells her to beware of evil men
...
It's the way
That he makes you cry
It's the way
That he's in your mind
Norah Jones = Are You Lonesome Tonight
Are you lonesome tonight,
do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?
...
Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
Madonna = What Can You Lose
What can you lose?
Only the blues.
Why keep concealing everything you're feeling?
Say it to her, what can you lose?
Maybe it shows,
She's had clues, which she chose to ignore.
Maybe though she knows,
And just wants to go on as before.
As a friend, nothing more
So she closes the door.
Well, if she does
Those are the dues.
Once the words are spoken,
Something may be broken.
Still, you love her
What can you lose?
But what if she goes?
At least now, you have part of her.
What if she had to choose?
Leave it alone
Hold it all in.
Better a bone
Don't even begin.
With so much to win,
There's too much to lose.
Groove Coverage = Poison
Your cruel device
Your blood, like ice
One look could kill
My pain, your thrill
I want to love you but I better not touch (Don't touch)
I want to hold you but my senses tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too much (Too much)
I want to taste you but your lips are venomous poison
You're poison running through my veins
You're poison, I don't want to break these chains
Your mouth, so hot
Your web, I'm caught
Your skin, so wet
Black lace on sweat
I hear you calling and it's needles and pins (And pins)
I want to hurt you just to hear you screaming my name
Don't want to touch you but you're under my skin (Deep in)
I want to kiss you but your lips are venomous poison
You're poison running through my veins
You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains
Poison
One look could kill
My pain, your thrill
I want to love you but I better not touch (Don't touch)
I want to hold you but my senses tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too much (Too much)
I want to taste you but your lips are venomous poison
You're poison running through my veins
You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains
Poison
Runnin' deep inside my veins,
Poison burnin' deep inside my veins
One look could kill
My pain your thrill
I want to love you but I better not touch (Don't touch)
I want to hold you but my senses tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too much (Too much)
I want to taste you but your lips are venomous poison, yeah
I don't want to break these chains
Poison.