It has really been a long time
It was wierd...because for so long i forgot that this even exisited...well...i have been really good and really bad...this was a very crazy year...and i am so happy that it has finally come to an end...school was really good...and for the first time in my life i am moving...and this time i am actually going to do it...it is wierd how i stayed for the wrong reasons...and now i am happy to say that all of the wrong reasons are out of my life...seriously....i am living life to the fullest...the haredest thing in my life was letting go of david....i miss him sometimes, but then i think of all of the bad things thatv he did to me over the past couple of years....i think the only thing that i miss about him is the togetherness...oh and stoking his hair to just let him know that i cared...it is soo entirely funny to know that his name was david too.....i guess you could almost say that it was never really meant to be because we have the same first name...and i am really sad about that....i tried to make it work for so many years...and it is finally over....i am going to miss him saying that he would fly down and visit me...lolz...how funny. ~! cause it made me smile knowing that he talked to me like that....but the saddest thing was knowing that it was not true....i feel like i am having more problems with my two brothers than anything else...my twin does not talk to me really anymore because he is married and has a wife...so the me and him thing is no longer there. but i guess that you win some things and you lose some as well....and i wish that he was a little more accepting of me sometimes....but in the end he is going to be the one who is really missing out on all of the wonderful things that i have to offer! wow...but i am happy to be leaving before he comes home cause then i really do not have to listen to all of his shit! i am going to miss him finally being really close to me....but in all actuality...he really was not...when we were little kids he would always live at levis house....and he really did not spend any time when i really needed him the most...and he tells kara everything....some times i wish he would just keep things that are between me and him between me and him! you know what i mean...well...ii have to get going now because i am sitting here at work typing this message...thanks for liostening...it is really nice to just talk!