you'll get over it
when you think of love, what comes to mind? does it involve romance? the woman being woo-ed by a charming amazing man? kissing in the rain? passionate, perfect, orgasmic sex... no no....love-making? the man making breakfast in bed for you and sending you flowers for no reason? what about taking you out to a fancy diner and paying for everything, no matter how expensive? or giving you the massage you're dying for? anything else? sure. well, congratulations. you've been brainwashed by society.
there is no such love. and if you have this so-called love, its not real. first off, why do the guys have to do all the wooing. why can't girls ever get a guy flowers, or pay for a nice dinner? or blindfold his eyes, drive him way out somewhere you deem worthy, just to watch the sunset and talk about life? why can't girls ever start a bubble bath with candles and oils and surprise the guy by having fun naked and it being your idea? we have this view of romance as being a guy thing. which, in my opinion, isn't equal, rather boring, and sexist. personally, i love seeing something that reminds me of the guy and buying it for him, just because. and thikning of ways to surprise him, just because i want to let him know he's special. oh, and why isn't there any good jewelry for men? all you see are diamonds and necklaces and rings for women. spoiled, bitchy, gody women. what about guys? rings with no gem. watches, i guess, are about it. how lame and boring.
secondly, where do you suppose the idea of "love" came from. humans, by nature, are capable of love, yes. but, we are governed first and foremost by instincts. men's instincts tell them to spread the seed of their loins, to keep the population going and growing. they hunt for food and survival. and have the instinct to protect. whether that be their home, the fruit of their loins, or someone they care aobut, its still there. women, are governed by the instinct of protection as well. protecting the house, the food, their offspring. but also by the maternal instict to raise and teach their children so that their culture may grow and be successful. in an "uncivilized" culture, the women stay home, garden, teach and raise children, protect what is important to them, cook, clean, and take care of their "village". men, hunt, protect, help teach the children, and fornicate as much as possible. so why is it that women have this idea of settling down with the "special one and only"? instinctively, men have sex with multiple partners, are attracted to multiple people, and desire to roam free with whomever they please. so, why is it that women haven't adapted to this instinct? or maybe, the cause isn't that women haven't learned to understand it, but maybe society preaches of this amazing, romantic love, that anyone with a soul could learn to desire. many women have the desire to have sex with multiple people and many have no intention of settling down. but mass media suggests that this behavior, is inappropirate, sinful, and disgusting. and now a days, its more likely that men who have multiple partners are cheered for their success whereas women are considered sluts. where did this sexist thought process come from? christianized society.
so, what really is love? many things. its different for every person. and just because someone actually thinks for themselves and doesn't allow their minds to be taken over, doesn't mean they are sluts, or gross, or sinful. it just means they understand their instincts and desires. now, the people who actually commit to someone and only that someone and then cheat, yes, are wrong. but if the basic understanding is there, that "yes, i care about you, but i want to be able to do whatever with whomever", than it should be acceptable. its not about what soceity says, its about what you think, feel, and agree with. people are so caught up with this whole idea of marriage and babies and that special someone, that they don't actually think for themselves.
love, to me, is about understanding. and friendship. and connections. having a physical, emotional and spiritual connection with someone, is love. being able to share ideas and argue, and agree to disagree, is love. spending time doing what i want, and spending time doing what my partner wants, whether i really want to or not, is love. in life there are sacrifices. do you know that the word friend is described as? someone who cares about you and accepts your flaws. no one is perfect, and if anyone has a big enough ego to think so, they aren't worth your time. imperfection is beauty. and beauty in all shapes and sizes is worth working for. not saying that love isn't hard or complex or misunderstood. because it really is. love to me, is driving 30 minutes out of your way in the middle of the night, because your parnter needs a ride. or holding their hand when they go through something horrific and excrutiatinly painful. love, is fighting and being mad at eachother, yet knowing you really care, so you suck it up and talk through the problems, even though it may anger you. love is sitting at home, bored, when in walks your parnter and they got you tea or a book or the burt's bees body wash that you secretly wanted. love is understanding, even when you don't agree. love is being there when they need it. it doesn't mean you have to stay at home, get married, have kids, grow old together and then regret it later on. my idea of love, is traveling like the wind. all across the world, seeing and experiencing all that this fucked-up world has to offer. growing and experiencing these things with someone you care for, is love. you know the movie Chocolate? and Kimya Dawson's song, Wandering Daughter? i want that to be me. traveling, never stopping, until i find peace in a place i stand smelling the air every day. and love, will ither be with me, or find me. i'm in no rush. whats the rush? you hurry to find that someone, hurry to get married and have kids. for what? enjoy life. that way you won't resent your children. do what feels right to you, when it feels right to you. and stop worrying about what society says is acceptable and whether or not groups of people accept you.then and only then, will you know what love really is.
there is no such love. and if you have this so-called love, its not real. first off, why do the guys have to do all the wooing. why can't girls ever get a guy flowers, or pay for a nice dinner? or blindfold his eyes, drive him way out somewhere you deem worthy, just to watch the sunset and talk about life? why can't girls ever start a bubble bath with candles and oils and surprise the guy by having fun naked and it being your idea? we have this view of romance as being a guy thing. which, in my opinion, isn't equal, rather boring, and sexist. personally, i love seeing something that reminds me of the guy and buying it for him, just because. and thikning of ways to surprise him, just because i want to let him know he's special. oh, and why isn't there any good jewelry for men? all you see are diamonds and necklaces and rings for women. spoiled, bitchy, gody women. what about guys? rings with no gem. watches, i guess, are about it. how lame and boring.
secondly, where do you suppose the idea of "love" came from. humans, by nature, are capable of love, yes. but, we are governed first and foremost by instincts. men's instincts tell them to spread the seed of their loins, to keep the population going and growing. they hunt for food and survival. and have the instinct to protect. whether that be their home, the fruit of their loins, or someone they care aobut, its still there. women, are governed by the instinct of protection as well. protecting the house, the food, their offspring. but also by the maternal instict to raise and teach their children so that their culture may grow and be successful. in an "uncivilized" culture, the women stay home, garden, teach and raise children, protect what is important to them, cook, clean, and take care of their "village". men, hunt, protect, help teach the children, and fornicate as much as possible. so why is it that women have this idea of settling down with the "special one and only"? instinctively, men have sex with multiple partners, are attracted to multiple people, and desire to roam free with whomever they please. so, why is it that women haven't adapted to this instinct? or maybe, the cause isn't that women haven't learned to understand it, but maybe society preaches of this amazing, romantic love, that anyone with a soul could learn to desire. many women have the desire to have sex with multiple people and many have no intention of settling down. but mass media suggests that this behavior, is inappropirate, sinful, and disgusting. and now a days, its more likely that men who have multiple partners are cheered for their success whereas women are considered sluts. where did this sexist thought process come from? christianized society.
so, what really is love? many things. its different for every person. and just because someone actually thinks for themselves and doesn't allow their minds to be taken over, doesn't mean they are sluts, or gross, or sinful. it just means they understand their instincts and desires. now, the people who actually commit to someone and only that someone and then cheat, yes, are wrong. but if the basic understanding is there, that "yes, i care about you, but i want to be able to do whatever with whomever", than it should be acceptable. its not about what soceity says, its about what you think, feel, and agree with. people are so caught up with this whole idea of marriage and babies and that special someone, that they don't actually think for themselves.
love, to me, is about understanding. and friendship. and connections. having a physical, emotional and spiritual connection with someone, is love. being able to share ideas and argue, and agree to disagree, is love. spending time doing what i want, and spending time doing what my partner wants, whether i really want to or not, is love. in life there are sacrifices. do you know that the word friend is described as? someone who cares about you and accepts your flaws. no one is perfect, and if anyone has a big enough ego to think so, they aren't worth your time. imperfection is beauty. and beauty in all shapes and sizes is worth working for. not saying that love isn't hard or complex or misunderstood. because it really is. love to me, is driving 30 minutes out of your way in the middle of the night, because your parnter needs a ride. or holding their hand when they go through something horrific and excrutiatinly painful. love, is fighting and being mad at eachother, yet knowing you really care, so you suck it up and talk through the problems, even though it may anger you. love is sitting at home, bored, when in walks your parnter and they got you tea or a book or the burt's bees body wash that you secretly wanted. love is understanding, even when you don't agree. love is being there when they need it. it doesn't mean you have to stay at home, get married, have kids, grow old together and then regret it later on. my idea of love, is traveling like the wind. all across the world, seeing and experiencing all that this fucked-up world has to offer. growing and experiencing these things with someone you care for, is love. you know the movie Chocolate? and Kimya Dawson's song, Wandering Daughter? i want that to be me. traveling, never stopping, until i find peace in a place i stand smelling the air every day. and love, will ither be with me, or find me. i'm in no rush. whats the rush? you hurry to find that someone, hurry to get married and have kids. for what? enjoy life. that way you won't resent your children. do what feels right to you, when it feels right to you. and stop worrying about what society says is acceptable and whether or not groups of people accept you.then and only then, will you know what love really is.