(no subject)
From the Round Table.
She:
Louise tapped a pen against the table, drumming out a tuneless rhythm. “I am beginning to notice something about all of you. You all have this girl in your lives.” A couple in the group blushed slightly, waiting for her to finish making a point. “That being said, I would really like to hear about her, whoever she is to each of you.” She laughed. “Does that make sense?”
“You want us to tell you about the girl in each of our lives,” Alex affirmed clearly. Louise nodded. “I guess it is only fair, then. I guess I can tell you about Luke.”
“Thought you said it was a girl, Alex,” Nisha laughed easily.
“Luke as in Luca. Lucinda Charleston, originally from London, living in Angelus, owner of my heart. She is one of the few women who put up with me on a regular basis for any sustained period of time.” Alex gave a small sigh, tinged with both regret and love.
Nix leaned toward Alex, hands loose between his knees. “How did you meet?”
Alex flushed entirely too red, and mumbled, “It was a one-night-stand. We got drunk and it just…. It happened and we…” his face was flaming then, and he looked up at Nix with a shrug, “I woke up and was kicked out of her apartment with barely a stitch of clothing on. We ended up talking about it, eventually, and realizing it was more us being there for each other and not really just nameless, faceless sex. It was awkward and unsettling and the start of something so amazing, I still cannot believe it is real. We knew each other before and after and yet knew nothing about each other at all, as strange as it seems. And still we…” He finally took a deep breath. “I do not know how or why but I found someone who loves me. Really and truly loves me in a way I cannot begin to describe. I have found her and she is letting me stay here this semester to get myself in order, to get my stuff in order, so that I can come back and devote myself entirely to her and what she wants.”
“Sounds like she is taking over your life.”
“Would you have it any other way, Sin?” Alex retorted.
Sin shook his head, his semi-joking comment before clearly not having the impression he wanted. “Not hardly. Pacie has ruled my life from the moment I set eyes on her. I met her online, strangely. We talked a bit online, and then we met and… it just… grew from there?” His voice lilted at the end, a strange question amongst the certainties of his relationship with her. “We moved so fast. We met in the middle of July, and then things just went from there… zooming forward with no looking back. I have never looked back. We have our hang-ups, you know. She has a past that… always haunts her. It is always there and looming and…” he sighed softly and drooped completely. “I am not exactly the model choice in boyfriend. But she puts up with me and all my failings.”
He smiled again, earnest in his enthusiasm. “I do not want to say anything that may spoil it, but I want to ask her to marry me. Her past and my past do not matter, not in the long run. She loves me and I love her. I would gladly do whatever she says, whenever she says, if it would make her happy.”
Nix clapped his hands, his sarcasm acidic in the love. “A prime example, a magnificent specimen of true love.”
Sin’s head whipped around, his friend’s words stinging him. “What would you know, Nix? You would not know love if it beat you about the head. Do you think we are blind, that no one sees what you are doing to Shaylee?” Nix had the decency to flush at that statement. Sin barreled on. “You ought to be thankful I have not said anything yet. But do not think I will not say something if you keep… fucking tarcaisne, go maraí siad…” he trailed off.
Nix murmured something that had Sin stirring up in his face again. “What?” Sin said, the British Bulldog in him rattling his cage.
“I said,” Nix spoke softly, trembling in his seat, “that it is not that I do not love Shay. It is that I love her too much to let her go.”
“Bullshit.”
“You do not get it.” Nix shook his head and wrapped his arms around himself tightly. “I have never had someone love me so much that they would give up their happiness for mine. I have never known that love could be something so…. Imagine. I have found 2 people in my life who love me despite everything that I have done wrong. Shay is willing to stay with me, to love me despite the fact that I am still in love with Liam. Still with Liam. Shay is given me a chance to show her that I can take care of her and protect her and that anything I do for her is so she can be happy. That is love, right?” he asked.
He did not wait for an answer. “We have been friends longer than we have been lovers. And I know for a fact that I love her. I just want her to be happy and we have been close enough that I could do that. I took off to Italy with her in the middle of classes because she needed a break and I wanted to give that to her. I want to give her everything that she has never had and that I have never had. I just want her to be happy,” he finished softly.
“Funny way of showing it, Nix.” Nisha sighed. “But, I guess I understand. A little.” She shook her head. “Sure makes it hard to like you, though.”
Nix gave a small, harsh laugh, soft in the room. “You think I do not know it?”
She:
Louise tapped a pen against the table, drumming out a tuneless rhythm. “I am beginning to notice something about all of you. You all have this girl in your lives.” A couple in the group blushed slightly, waiting for her to finish making a point. “That being said, I would really like to hear about her, whoever she is to each of you.” She laughed. “Does that make sense?”
“You want us to tell you about the girl in each of our lives,” Alex affirmed clearly. Louise nodded. “I guess it is only fair, then. I guess I can tell you about Luke.”
“Thought you said it was a girl, Alex,” Nisha laughed easily.
“Luke as in Luca. Lucinda Charleston, originally from London, living in Angelus, owner of my heart. She is one of the few women who put up with me on a regular basis for any sustained period of time.” Alex gave a small sigh, tinged with both regret and love.
Nix leaned toward Alex, hands loose between his knees. “How did you meet?”
Alex flushed entirely too red, and mumbled, “It was a one-night-stand. We got drunk and it just…. It happened and we…” his face was flaming then, and he looked up at Nix with a shrug, “I woke up and was kicked out of her apartment with barely a stitch of clothing on. We ended up talking about it, eventually, and realizing it was more us being there for each other and not really just nameless, faceless sex. It was awkward and unsettling and the start of something so amazing, I still cannot believe it is real. We knew each other before and after and yet knew nothing about each other at all, as strange as it seems. And still we…” He finally took a deep breath. “I do not know how or why but I found someone who loves me. Really and truly loves me in a way I cannot begin to describe. I have found her and she is letting me stay here this semester to get myself in order, to get my stuff in order, so that I can come back and devote myself entirely to her and what she wants.”
“Sounds like she is taking over your life.”
“Would you have it any other way, Sin?” Alex retorted.
Sin shook his head, his semi-joking comment before clearly not having the impression he wanted. “Not hardly. Pacie has ruled my life from the moment I set eyes on her. I met her online, strangely. We talked a bit online, and then we met and… it just… grew from there?” His voice lilted at the end, a strange question amongst the certainties of his relationship with her. “We moved so fast. We met in the middle of July, and then things just went from there… zooming forward with no looking back. I have never looked back. We have our hang-ups, you know. She has a past that… always haunts her. It is always there and looming and…” he sighed softly and drooped completely. “I am not exactly the model choice in boyfriend. But she puts up with me and all my failings.”
He smiled again, earnest in his enthusiasm. “I do not want to say anything that may spoil it, but I want to ask her to marry me. Her past and my past do not matter, not in the long run. She loves me and I love her. I would gladly do whatever she says, whenever she says, if it would make her happy.”
Nix clapped his hands, his sarcasm acidic in the love. “A prime example, a magnificent specimen of true love.”
Sin’s head whipped around, his friend’s words stinging him. “What would you know, Nix? You would not know love if it beat you about the head. Do you think we are blind, that no one sees what you are doing to Shaylee?” Nix had the decency to flush at that statement. Sin barreled on. “You ought to be thankful I have not said anything yet. But do not think I will not say something if you keep… fucking tarcaisne, go maraí siad…” he trailed off.
Nix murmured something that had Sin stirring up in his face again. “What?” Sin said, the British Bulldog in him rattling his cage.
“I said,” Nix spoke softly, trembling in his seat, “that it is not that I do not love Shay. It is that I love her too much to let her go.”
“Bullshit.”
“You do not get it.” Nix shook his head and wrapped his arms around himself tightly. “I have never had someone love me so much that they would give up their happiness for mine. I have never known that love could be something so…. Imagine. I have found 2 people in my life who love me despite everything that I have done wrong. Shay is willing to stay with me, to love me despite the fact that I am still in love with Liam. Still with Liam. Shay is given me a chance to show her that I can take care of her and protect her and that anything I do for her is so she can be happy. That is love, right?” he asked.
He did not wait for an answer. “We have been friends longer than we have been lovers. And I know for a fact that I love her. I just want her to be happy and we have been close enough that I could do that. I took off to Italy with her in the middle of classes because she needed a break and I wanted to give that to her. I want to give her everything that she has never had and that I have never had. I just want her to be happy,” he finished softly.
“Funny way of showing it, Nix.” Nisha sighed. “But, I guess I understand. A little.” She shook her head. “Sure makes it hard to like you, though.”
Nix gave a small, harsh laugh, soft in the room. “You think I do not know it?”