~~*Ur Eyes Can Be So Cruel, As So Can I*~~
I FIGURED SINCE I WAS HOME, WHICH I DIDNT THINK WOULD HAPPEN, THAT I WOULD LEAVE A ENTRY.. JUST TO SAY HOW THIS LOVELY FUCKING DAMN DAY IS GOING... ZACK GOT A FLAT TIRE LAST NIGHT SO HE DIDNT MAKE IT HOME LAST NIGHT.. BUT HE IS HOME NOW.. HE HAD TO STAY THE NIGHT AT THE BOARDING THINGY.. WHATEVER THE HELL IT IS.. MOM IS PRETTY UPSET, WE ARE HAVING OUR DOGGY RENEGADE PUT TO SLEEP TOMORROW MORNING.. ZACK AND I DUG THE HOLE TONIGHT, I FELT AS IF I WAS GOING TO BE SICK.. WE HAVE HAD HIM FOR LIKE 12 YRS, AND HE'S PART OF THE FAMILY, LIKE MY OWN LIL BROTHER.. :( I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO RIGHT NOW.. ROB HAS TO TALK TO ME.. AND I DONT KNOW WHAT ABOUT.. I REALLY LOVE HIM, DONT GET ME WRONG I REALLY DO.. I CANT WAIT TO FINALLY BE BACK IN HIS ARMS, AND SPEND THE DAY WTIH HIS FAMILY.. I'VE BEEN SICK FOR THE PAST 2 WKS, I DONT SLEEP, WHEN I EAT I GET SICK.. I DONT KNOW WHATS GOING ON WITH MY BODY.. I FEEL AS IF SOMEONE IS RIPPING AT MY HEART AND TAREING IT OUT... I dont know how to feel anymore.. I cant cry, I have no tears left for once.. I feel like my life is being destroyed right before my eyes.. I cant stand the feeling anymore, the emptiness, the failure, the heartache.. I miss him.. I really miss my son.. God I wish for just one thing, and that is to bring him back to me.. But I cant do it.. Never will I be able to bring that little guy back to me.. I lay awake at night, trying to take a single breath but it feels like someone's hands are around it, trying to kill me.. I wake up from nightmares sweaty and gasping for air...
I hear the screams late at night, of the aweful day that my life became a meer name.. A name that I could care less about anymore.. I am nothing without him, I am nothing besides a scared little girl trying to cry for her home.. But I cant no more.. I cant feel the feelings they all ask me to feel.. I dont know what to do anymore..
I dont know how to feel when I dream about my lil boy, his screams I call for, his tears I beg to feel.. I hold on to everything that is in my dreams, but then I am being ripped from him again, and awake I come to this fucking world.. A world where I cant stand to live.. I hate it all.. The only things that keep me here, is my family, friends, and my career, if it wasnt for them.. Then my soul would be no longer alive.. Can someone tell me just how someone can be so cruel and take a lil innocent unborn baby away...?
~~*ShadowPr1ncess*~~
I hear the screams late at night, of the aweful day that my life became a meer name.. A name that I could care less about anymore.. I am nothing without him, I am nothing besides a scared little girl trying to cry for her home.. But I cant no more.. I cant feel the feelings they all ask me to feel.. I dont know what to do anymore..
I dont know how to feel when I dream about my lil boy, his screams I call for, his tears I beg to feel.. I hold on to everything that is in my dreams, but then I am being ripped from him again, and awake I come to this fucking world.. A world where I cant stand to live.. I hate it all.. The only things that keep me here, is my family, friends, and my career, if it wasnt for them.. Then my soul would be no longer alive.. Can someone tell me just how someone can be so cruel and take a lil innocent unborn baby away...?
~~*ShadowPr1ncess*~~