A New Beginning (Chapter 5)
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A/N: Alright, so I received so many awesome reviews that I thought my head would explode. So a million thanks to everyone for your awesome comments :D
As always let me know what you think of this one <3
Chapter 5
Callie rushed into her house with tears stinging her eyes and blurring her vision. She frantically searched the wall for the light switch and when she flipped it on a low groan of complaint sounded from the couch. A shock of red hair could be seen sitting up slowly, rubbing their eyes and searching for the source of her rude awakening.
“Cal is that-” Addison's eyes came to rest on a distraught Callie standing with her arms wrapped tightly around her chest.
She immediately jumped from the couch and rushed to capture Callie in a comforting hug. Without a word they moved to the couch where Addison kept her arms wrapped around Callie’s body as she shook with sobs into Addison's shoulder. Gently she stroked Callie’s hair and rubbed her back until the brunette's sobs slowed and she started to sniffle.
Addison was instantly grateful that she had chosen to come visit Callie, although this wasn’t exactly how she pictured them seeing each other again after three months apart. After their phone call the night before, Addison had decided to catch a plane the next morning, planning to visit her best friend for the weekend and then fly back. She almost decided to wait it out until Callie called for help, but she figured it was best to visit before it was too late. Now from the looks of things, she felt that maybe she was too late after all.
Callie eventually lifted her head from Addison's shoulder and looked into Addison's questioning eyes. She bit her bottom lip and sucked in a deep breath of air before trying to explain herself.
“George.” She could only manage a single word as she sucked in another breath to keep from crying again.
“He...he was with Izzie. He's been cheating on me with Izzie Stevens.”
Addison pulled Callie into another hug as the tears started up again. She wasn’t entirely shocked to hear this after hearing how George had been acting towards Callie lately. But she still felt for her friend. She knew what it felt like to have that happen. She hated the feeling and she knew that now all she could do was comfort Callie until she cried it out. Silence encompassed the two best friends as Addison rubbed Callie’s hair, her head now resting in Addison's lap.
Callie silently replayed the scene in her head. George's hands holding Izzie's small waist, his lips taking hers without regret, his face as she told him that it was over. That was the one thing that hurt Callie the most. George didn’t seem to be the least bit sorry as he watched a tear fall down Callie’s cheek. His face was blank, uncaring. And that alone was the biggest slap in the face to Callie. He felt no shame for cheating on her. Callie felt her face redden with renewed anger and she heard her last words to him echoing in her head.
'I hate you.'
And she meant them with every part of her being. She hadn't planned to say anything more than 'It's over,' but George's unsympathetic look infuriated her. And now thinking back on it she couldn’t decide why she hated him more: because he cheated on her and didn’t care or because he ruined her time with Arizona, time that she so desperately needed. Arizona. A twinge of regret and guilt hit her as she realized that she forgot to tell her goodbye in her rush to get to Addison.
“Addie?” Callie whispered, her voice rough from crying.
“Yeah, Cal?”
“I'm so confused Addie,” she was confused alright, but not because of George.
As far as she was concerned, George had right to be in her thoughts ever again. They were more than done and she didn’t ever want to talk to him again. She knew that he had changed, that something in him had gone wrong. She pretended for too long not to notice the looks that he gave Izzie Stevens and she way she looked at him right back. She wanted him to want her. And he didn’t. He wanted Izzie. So that’s what he got and Callie felt a wave of relief consume her as she realized that she didn’t have to stay up late worrying anymore about why George was so distant. Now she knew the answer, the answer she had known would be coming, but refused to believe. And now it was here staring her in the face.
Now it was her turn to move on, no matter how difficult that would be. George had taken a part of her with him. A part that she didn’t ever think she could get back. But she sure as hell planned on trying.
Addison interrupted Callie’s thoughts with a sympathetic answer.
“It's okay to be confused Callie. Its a lot to take in. What George did to you was not okay and it will take some time to get over what he's done.” Addison frowned at the memories that she had in this particular subject. “Trust me, I know.”
Callie nodded understandingly, appreciating Addison's advice that she knew she needed. But Callie was confused about Arizona. Not George.
She thought back to the time she spent with Arizona tonight and this time frustrated tears fell from her caramel eyes. She knew she was ready to know Arizona, to really try and figure out what she was hiding behind those dimples.
And for some reason she had been intrigued by the idea of flirting with he knew friend, so that's exactly what she did. But what she found surprised her and left her more confused than before. She wanted Arizona. When they were dancing together she wanted the blonde more than anything. She wanted to physically feel her touch to determine whether or not Arizona was flirting back. The way the blonde looked at her with dark eyes made her certain that Arizona liked what she saw and the fact that she opened up and danced with Callie made her wonder if she was doing it to be flirty, or if it was only a result of the alcohol.
Callie rolled over slowly to stare up at Addison from her spot in the red-head's lap. She mentally argued with herself about discussing all of this with her best friend. She needed to tell someone before she went crazy, but how would Addison take it?
Addison knew something else was bothering Callie as she watched her angrily wipe away tears that stained her face, tears that she didn’t feel were sad tears for George any longer.
Callie’s eyes flickered with hesitation and Addison's suspicions were confirmed. All she could do was wait patiently.
A few minutes later Addison finally decided to speed up the process, anxious to hear what Callie was thinking about.
“What is it Cal?”
“Nothing ever gets by you Addie. You know me too well don’t you?”
Addison winked an affirmation and brushed a stray strand of dark hair out of Callie’s eyes.
Callie didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t know how. And she wasn’t entirely sure that she wanted to, but if anyone could help her it would be Addison. So it was now or never.
Taking a deep breath she let a single word out. “Arizona.”
Addison frowned in mock confusion and wrinkled her eyebrows. She playfully rested a hand on Callie’s forehead as if assessing her friend's health.
“Um, Cal, did you drink too much? Because we are definitely in Washington...not Arizona.”
Callie couldn’t help the amused laughter that she allowed to momentarily shake her body.
“No, I mean Arizona. The new girl.”
Addison giggled softly, glad to hear the sound of laughter from her friend, even if it was short lived.
“Yeah, I know. What about her?”
Callie hesitated once more and Addison watched her friend's face turn very serious.
“I'm scared Addison.”
Now Addison was truly confused. “Uh, why? Is she really that awful? You could always change lab partners you know.”
Callie wished it was that easy. But it wasn’t.
“No, she's-” She searched for the right word and had a hard time deciding on the right one to describe her. So instead she let a lot of words fly out that she knew were true.
“She's different, and dangerous, and cute, and way too perky,” she rolled her eyes for emphasis. “And I can't stop seeing her every time I close my eyes.”
She said the last sentence with a very hushed tone, as if she was afraid to admit it out loud to herself as well as to Addison.
The red-head waited for an explanation while she tried to interpret what Callie was trying to tell her. Suddenly her eyes widened with realization.
“Calliope Iphigenia Torres.”
Callie winced at hearing her full name, bracing herself for the onslaught of words that were sure to follow.
“Are you-” Addison sat Callie up and looked her straight in her eyes, searching them for the truth.
“Are you speaking the vagina monologues now?!”
Callie busted out laughing and Addison shook her head.
“Callie, I’m serious.”
“What does that even mean Addison?”
“You like...girls...” Addison couldn’t believe that the possibility even existed, but it sure started to seem that way.
“Callie...you-” a wary grin spread across Addison's lips and Callie felt scared for a moment as she knew what was coming.
“You like her. You like her, Callie. Oh my God, you like Arizona!” Addison scoffed, surprised that those words were actually being said.
Callie tensed and stopped laughing at the words that sounded so out of place coming from Addison. She didn’t even know how to answer.
“No...” Callie whispered, unsure of the truthfulness of that answer.
“No I don’t like her. I’ve only known her for two days, Addison.”
“Ever heard of love at first sight, hun?” Addison interjected, helping her friend sort through her feelings.
“I'm not a lesbian. I’m not,” Callie insisted, willing herself to believe it. “I like penis.”
Addison laid a hand on Callie’s shoulder and smiled.
“Cal, no offense, but how would you know? Aren't you still a virgin/”
Callie frowned at her excuse being shot down so quickly and nodded.
“Yeah, that's true. But still...I”m not a lesbian.”
She felt a thousand words pushing against her every fiber, desperate to escape her lips, so finally she let them pour out as Addison listened thoughtfully.
“Arizona...she had this, this thing about her that pulls me to her. I don’t know what it is, but she makes me want to be near her. I want to be her friend. I want to know her and spend time with her. And it's not because of a physical attraction, I mean she is really hot, but-”
At this Addison finally spoke up.
“Callie. Listen to yourself. If you want a relationship with Arizona, then have a relationship. Don’t try to talk yourself out of it.” She patted Callie’s shoulder and willed Callie t look her in the eyes so she knew the girl was listening to what she had to say.
“Don’t sell yourself short because of what other people expect from you. Get to know Arizona and just let whatever happens happen. Don’t be scared of what you don’t know Callie. It will get you nowhere, and hearing you now, well, you need to do something about this. You may not know what to do at the moment, but take some time and think about it Callie. You can't ignore your feelings for Arizona.” She shook her head earnestly for emphasis.
“You cant ignore those feelings, as confusing and scary they may seem, because they will not go away until you give them a reason to Callie.”
Callie nodded, knowing Addison was right, as always. Her feelings needed to be set free or she would be stressed about them until they drove her to her death. She was afraid to accept that the feelings that were now painfully obvious to her, but she had a feeling that she would.
“Wait. Callie, do you know if Arizona feels the same way you do? Does she like you?”
Sure, Arizona seemed flirty, but she wasn’t obvious about it. Perhaps it was only a park of her perky personality.
Callie sighed. “I don’t know. I mean, we flirted with each other. At least, I think it was flirting. Maybe it was only the alcohol. But I swear I saw something in her eyes, Addison. Something that told me she was just as scared as I was. But something that said she wanted to experiment with it as much as I did. So I really don’t know. I mean, what are the odds that she is actually a lesbian? I mean really, with her looks she has probably been the cause of death in several guys already.”
Addison giggle and shrugged. “Anything is possible Callie.”
Callie recalled the past few days to come up with a more formal answer to the question.
Arizona certainly did put on the charm several times: the first time she met Callie, at lunch the next day, and especially in Chemistry. Callie noticed how her blue eyes sparkled when she spoke to her, how she flipped her blonde hair occasionally, and how she flashed her dimples when she knew that Callie was looking.
And the party. Callie felt a shiver run through her body as she thought about the way Arizona danced with her earlier that night at the party. Arizona had insisted that she couldn’t dance, but Callie thought she proved herself wrong as she easily matched her own motions. It was as if no one else was looking. Arizona had held Callie’s gaze as their bodies moved towards each other. She remembered the way Arizona had laced their fingers together to dance, shocked by the effect such an innocent action had on her. It made her crave Arizona’s touch. She felt a fire ignite in her that she had never experienced and she knew then that she needed Arizona.
No matter how hard Callie tried, she couldn’t forget that feeling of intense need that she felt for Arizona. And now she knew...she didn’t want to forget it...
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Arizona laid in her bed with the covers pulled up to her chin. She couldn’t believe everything that had happened tonight. She only wanted to have some fun with her new friend and the night ended up in disaster. She couldn’t forget the hurt on Callie’s face when she discovered George and Izzie. Arizona was shocked, and slightly appalled at herself, to find that she suddenly had an intense hatred for George O'Malley. He ruined Callie, betrayed her after she had given her heart to him. And even though she had only known Callie for a short time, she wanted nothing more than to comfort Callie and find a way to protect her from ever feeling that betrayal again.
She knew from the start that it was going to be hard to ignore Calliope Torres. And she was right, tonight had only proven that to her. It was impossible to reject the feelings that started to overwhelm her like never before.
Arizona especially felt too many unwelcome feelings as Callie flew out of the car, not even bothering to say goodbye or offer thanks for the ride. She was hurt and confused, but most of all she felt concern for Callie at seeing her burst into tears. She could only hope that she wasn’t the cause of the tears that streaked across Callie’s beautiful face.
Things may have gotten too close tonight, yes, she knew that. But it scared her that she was so ready to give herself to Calliope. It had to have been the alcohol, or the way Callie was dancing. Oh yes, definitely the way Callie was dancing...Callie's body so close to hers, her eyes daring her to come closer...
It made her crazy, as she had shown herself by talking to Mark. She frowned deeply at the memory of all but letting herself be known to Mark. Hopefully he would drink enough to forget everything he had heard.
But she knew that there was soon to be no way to escape the way she was feeling about Callie. And she had no one to talk to about it. Arizona wanted Daniel to know so badly, but she couldn’t stand the thought of breaking her brother's heart with the news that she was a lesbian. But she would have to do it soon.
She was scared of herself and angry at herself for even entertaining the thought that Callie might actually feel the same way. Because she knew that when it all played out, she would lose a friend and her heart would no doubt be broken. Again.
And Callie would never go for her even if she was feeling the same way, because her heart had also just been broken by George. There was no way she would be ready to see someone again for a long time. And if Arizona admitted it to herself, she was angry at realizing that she would be a rebound, that if Callie ever did share her feelings, then she would be the rebound, no doubt used for revenge. And that would sting far worse than Callie rejecting her.
She stared up at the ceiling, wishing she could sleep, but knew that it would be a while before she could rest. After thinking about it for several minutes, Arizona finally came to a conclusion. She was going to be Calliope Torres' friend. Nothing more...
A soft knock came from Arizona’s door and she quickly pretended to be asleep, not wanting to discuss anything with her parents.
“Zona?” A soft whisper pierced the silence in the room. “Are you still awake?”
Upon hearing the voice of her brother Arizona immediately switched on the light beside her bed and looked over to Daniel, his head down.
As Daniel made his way to Arizona’s bed she could tell that he had been crying. She was immediately afraid of what had reduced her brother to tears. And as he looked up at her, obvious hurt and confusion in his eyes, she knew what he was about to say...
“Arizona...” That was never a good sign. He never used her full name.
“Arizona, we need to talk.”