(no subject)
I've come to a somewhat startling, albeit not-all-that-surprising, revelation: I eat, sleep, and breathe video games. I came to this realization this weekend while playing Fallout 3 and noting that, despite having a fiancee and a full-time job where I work at least one hour of unpaid overtime every day, I've logged almost 60 hours into that game since I purchased it in late October. I then realized that I wasn't listening to the low whistle of winds over the irradiated DC wasteland or the clever quips of Three Dog's radio show, but instead to one of the several gaming podcasts that I download regularly each week. I then realized that I managed to do all this while still finding time to play Halo 3 for hours every weekend with Adam. I THEN realized that most of my conversations and even relationships are based around video games, and that I have only a handful of friends who do not share my passion for gaming.
Then it dawned on me. I live, eat, breathe, and probably shit video games (at least, if I had a Playstation 3 :P).
Now, this poses a bit of a conundrum. Gaming has permeated all facets of my life to the point where I cannot imagine my life without it. And I'm not referring to simply playing video games. I'm referring to keeping up with industry news and developments, listening to authorities discuss game theory, EVEN BEING INTERESTED IN HOW THE GAMING INDUSTRY IS WEATHERING THE FINANCIAL CRISIS! JESUS CHRIST! Finances, in my book, are NOT FUN! SINCE WHEN DID FINANCES BECOME INTERESTING?! When finances started affecting the amount of coins in Mario's purse. Mama mia. Let'sa go. But I digress.
Conundrum time. Break it down.
I'm trying to figure out what the fuck I want to do with the rest of my life. Now, there are a great number of things that interest me. I'm interested in the challenge of explaining concepts like addition or story composition to small children. I'm fascinated by my perhaps idealized perception of life of as a librarian. I'm moved by the thought of devoting my life to the study of religion and philosophy. But... do I have any passion for these things? Up until now, I've taken a very mercenary view to employment and careers. I enjoyed my past jobs, and I enjoy my current job, because of the challenge presented and because of the satisfaction of developing certain skills. But I've never had a passion for grants management or urban forest restoration. Instead, I've been passionate about writing in a style different than what I've encountered before and in having a non-traditional work environment. The only thing aside from video games that I can say I have a passion for is the study of philosophy and religion, and I still feel an overwhelming urge to combine them into an academic glance at video game theory, philosophy, and ethics. So really, the thing I can say that I truly possess a passion for is gaming and the video game industry.
So, what to do. I like my job, and I actually like how busy I am (though I sometimes wish it would calm down just a tad), but I don't think I can keep up my mercenary attitude towards employment. I just don't have the passion for the industry that I need to truly get where I would want to be (i.e., at the very top, because I've found that I can't stop myself from looking at what's next once I reach any particular point). I fear that I may need to actually pursue my passion in seeking employment. This sounds mundane, I know, but I assure you that this is an alien concept for me.
Long story short, I've decided to try and break into the video game journalism industry. I don't know where this path will lead me, and I don't know if I'll actually succeed in this, but at the very least I would have tried and I will have developed skills that I did not have otherwise. And hey, I'm only 22. I have time to screw up, and at least the early stages of my play will allow me to screw up while still maintaining a full-time job.
I'm going to cut this short, seeing as it's almost midnight and I didn't sleep nearly as well as I wanted to last night as well as the fact that we're babysitting my 3 year old nephew tomorrow after work so my dear sister can go bowling. But I'm genuinely energized and excited about the prospect of at least trying to break into this industry and doing something new with my passion. That's gotta count for something.
Stay tuned for my step-by-step, multi-year plan of how to break into the video game journalism industry, coming whenever the fuck I get around to it! Yay!
Then it dawned on me. I live, eat, breathe, and probably shit video games (at least, if I had a Playstation 3 :P).
Now, this poses a bit of a conundrum. Gaming has permeated all facets of my life to the point where I cannot imagine my life without it. And I'm not referring to simply playing video games. I'm referring to keeping up with industry news and developments, listening to authorities discuss game theory, EVEN BEING INTERESTED IN HOW THE GAMING INDUSTRY IS WEATHERING THE FINANCIAL CRISIS! JESUS CHRIST! Finances, in my book, are NOT FUN! SINCE WHEN DID FINANCES BECOME INTERESTING?! When finances started affecting the amount of coins in Mario's purse. Mama mia. Let'sa go. But I digress.
Conundrum time. Break it down.
I'm trying to figure out what the fuck I want to do with the rest of my life. Now, there are a great number of things that interest me. I'm interested in the challenge of explaining concepts like addition or story composition to small children. I'm fascinated by my perhaps idealized perception of life of as a librarian. I'm moved by the thought of devoting my life to the study of religion and philosophy. But... do I have any passion for these things? Up until now, I've taken a very mercenary view to employment and careers. I enjoyed my past jobs, and I enjoy my current job, because of the challenge presented and because of the satisfaction of developing certain skills. But I've never had a passion for grants management or urban forest restoration. Instead, I've been passionate about writing in a style different than what I've encountered before and in having a non-traditional work environment. The only thing aside from video games that I can say I have a passion for is the study of philosophy and religion, and I still feel an overwhelming urge to combine them into an academic glance at video game theory, philosophy, and ethics. So really, the thing I can say that I truly possess a passion for is gaming and the video game industry.
So, what to do. I like my job, and I actually like how busy I am (though I sometimes wish it would calm down just a tad), but I don't think I can keep up my mercenary attitude towards employment. I just don't have the passion for the industry that I need to truly get where I would want to be (i.e., at the very top, because I've found that I can't stop myself from looking at what's next once I reach any particular point). I fear that I may need to actually pursue my passion in seeking employment. This sounds mundane, I know, but I assure you that this is an alien concept for me.
Long story short, I've decided to try and break into the video game journalism industry. I don't know where this path will lead me, and I don't know if I'll actually succeed in this, but at the very least I would have tried and I will have developed skills that I did not have otherwise. And hey, I'm only 22. I have time to screw up, and at least the early stages of my play will allow me to screw up while still maintaining a full-time job.
I'm going to cut this short, seeing as it's almost midnight and I didn't sleep nearly as well as I wanted to last night as well as the fact that we're babysitting my 3 year old nephew tomorrow after work so my dear sister can go bowling. But I'm genuinely energized and excited about the prospect of at least trying to break into this industry and doing something new with my passion. That's gotta count for something.
Stay tuned for my step-by-step, multi-year plan of how to break into the video game journalism industry, coming whenever the fuck I get around to it! Yay!