blog: An update on the life and times of yours truly.
So there's a lot going on right now....
Living Situation, tl;dr:
Last summer, I interned with a youth theatre company in Australia, and I had one of those epic, self-realization face palm moments. I realized that I have, in fact, wanted to be an actor since I was 12 years-old, and the only thing keeping me from doing that was this abstract fear of being perceived as naive or frivolous, born out of the working/middle-class mentality toward art, and my dad's voice in my head saying, "There are a lot of actors waiting tables in New York." Subsequent realizations were (a) I'm not actually afraid of that, (b) that mentality is wrong, and (c) I am willing to what I have to in order to pursue a life of art. I resolved then and there that, upon finishing grad school, I would move someplace civilized and become an actor.
The resolution gradually became a vague plan, as I started thinking about the places I could go and what kind of acting I wanted to do. Enter Roommate R, a friend from high school, living in Minneapolis and working as a professional actor and choreographer. He mentioned on Facebook that he was working on a show (Tommy, if memory serves), and I, only sort of joking, said, "I'm just going to quit school and move up there and work with you, ok?" To which he replied, "DO IT!" This led to actual conversations about the possibility of my moving in.
There was lots of back and forth and frantic planning, but, long story short, I packed up my tiny car and drove from south Mississippi to central Minnesota, where I now reside.
The house is a very lovely, very old Victorian right smack in the middle of the city. This means a couple of things:
1) We're right off one of the main roads and can see the interstate from the window, so the sound of traffic is constant.
2) There is no air conditioning, which is only a problem when the weather gets, oh, like it's been for the past few weeks. I've been sleeping naked, with the window open and the fan on high, and I've still been sticking to the sheets.
3) There is no dishwasher.
4) There is only one bathroom.
5) Everything I could possibly need is within 10 miles.
6) The parts of the house that haven't been restored are a little rundown; the parts that have are gorgeous.
I live in a tiny room on the second floor with Roommate R, his wife Roommate A, and their dog Sophie, who is in need of perpetual love and attention and sheds like you would not believe. The Best Landlady Ever (BLE) lives downstairs with her two cats (One of whom is called Nightshade, and I haven't met the other one.), a retriever-chow mix named Jack, and, sometimes, her boyfriend, Roadie. (So referred to because he's a sound guy for rock bands. He was working on the Poison tour, but he got fired because the drummer didn't like him. He's got steady work when Brett Michaels tours solo, though.)
There is some hilarity that comes with three people sharing a bathroom, with which I will regale you at a future time. And one day I'm going to take a picture of the dishes that pile up as a result of not having a dishwasher.
I have a job working as a temp for Big Bank, doing filing and data entry. It's full time, pays okay, and the people are all really nice. Their dress code is business casual, but they're super laid back about tattoos, piercings, and dyed hair, which means that I will probably be twice tattooed and half blonde again at some point in the foreseeable future. Plus, the office is four blocks from out house, so I can walk to work. One of the other temps was told the position was for 18 months. Fingers crossed.
In the meantime, I'm booking auditions and applying for design jobs. No major developments to report on that front, though Roommate R put my name is for costume design on a show he's choreographing. Send good karma.
Dragon*Con, costuming, and body image. tl;dr:
I have a question for you, flist.
I made three costumes for the con: Dr. Girlfriend, Lady au Pair, and Red Riding Hood.
The thing is, I'm re-thinking the Red costume because:
(a) it didn't turn out as well as I would have liked,
(b) not bringing it would free up a ton of space in my very full suitcase,
(c) the boots, which are necessary to the outfit, will kill my feet,
(d) Red Riding Hood is kind of done, and
(e) steampunk is definitely done.
On the other hand:
(a) I worked really hard on it,
(b) it still looks bad-ass, and
(c) if I don't wear it I'll only have two costumes, both from The Venture Bros., unless I dig something else out of my closet.
I'll probably wind up wearing it for Halloween, regardless, because the bar is considerably lower for parties than for cons. I don't know. What do you think?
I'm also thinking I should try to lose some weight before D*C, mostly because of the Dr. Girlfriend costume. It looks great, and I have a system to cover some of the more... unsightly features of my figure. Still, if I resolve to tone myself up enough to be able to wear it without support garments, then I have a clear, concrete goal and a reasonable time frame. I'm fairly certain I can do it, physically, and if I don't have the discipline to maintain a workout routine for a month, then I have failed in more than just health matters.
Does anybody have any tips or resources for weight-loss/muscle toning diets and routines? If not, I may have to either start jogging, which I really don't want to do, or swallow the cost and join a gym. I generally eat like a tiny hippy rabbit, so it's really just a matter of, y'know, moving.
On the subject of appearance and body-image, I had a weird moment the other day. For the past few weeks, my skin and hair have been... not up to par. My acne's been unmanageable, and my hair, which I can normally persuade to be soft and shiny come hell or high water, was just not. I don't know if it's because of the weather or stress or hormones or what, but I just looked like a wreck, no matter what I did. Then, all of a sudden, I woke up Thursday morning and it was fine. My acne started to clear up overnight, and my hair hung exactly the way it was supposed to. (I even got a compliment on how shiny it was!) That morning, I went through my long and complicated beauty routine and looked in the mirror and thought, "There. That's what I'm supposed to look like."
It wasn't even a sense of pride or accomplishment, really. Not, "Wow, I look good today." It was a sense of relief, like I was finally able to look like myself. It was probably a combination of all of the above. The heat finally broke, my birth control (which wreaks havoc with my skin) was getting out of my system, and I'd finally got a job. Plus - and I think this contributes more to the specific feeling - I'd been out of place for the past few months. I stayed with my parents through June, and I never feel comfortable dressing like I normally do, there. Then I was in a new house in a city I'd never been to with people I only kind of knew, which would throw anybody off their game.
I have trouble articulating why looking a certain way is so important to me. It's not a matter of being fashionable or of conforming to particular style. It's about looking good, yes, but it's more than that. It's about looking like me. Smarter people than me have talked about the ways in which people express themselves through their clothes and appearance, but, for me, it's this weirdly intense need. Maybe it's because I wasn't able to express myself for so long that, as with so many other things, I have a deep fear of losing that freedom.
It could also be that I'm shallow, vain, and insecure, but that's a very negative interpretation and I don't do negative.
Art, tl;dr:
I realize that saying, "I don't know if this idea is good" is basically just saying, "I'm an artist", but I don't feel that way about all my ideas. Like, when I have an idea for an academic paper, I know it's good. I may not do it, or it may not be feasible, but I know it's a concept worth pursuing. With art, all I have is the drive to follow the rabbit down the hole and see where I end up. Sometimes I follow the rabbit, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I get to Wonderland, and sometimes I don't get anywhere. It depends on a lot of things, but I never know if the idea was good to begin with. Even things I've finished and am proud of, I never know.
Which is, of course, to say that I'm not working on anything, atm, but I have Ideas. I'm hoping I get the job designing the show that Roommate R is working on, because there's this one costume that would be an absolute pleasure to slave over. I'm also thinking about costumes for next year's cons; how they'd look, logistics, etc. Right now, the list of considerations is Rachel from Blade Runner, Romana from classic Doctor Who, a Stranger from The Venture Bros., or Bellatrix Lestrange. (No, you're not getting a link for that one.) They all have their problems and considerations, but anyone of them would be a lot of fun and a real challenge. I realize it'll be at least a year before I go to another con, but I would need to start working on costumes, like, last week, especially if I do any of these.
Thoughts, suggestions, and comments are welcome. Updates on the situation as it develops.
I have another, much more conceptual idea for a long-term art/media project, but I'm going to keep that close to my chest, for now. Does anybody know of a free (or easily, illegally obtained) user-friendly song writing program? I've used one before, but I don't remember what it was called. Alternatively, does anyone know any musicians/song writers who'd be willing to collaborate on an unbelievably insane venture?
Captain America (no spoilers), tl;dr:
It should come as no surprise to anyone that I found the original, skinny version of Steve Rogers slightly more attractive than the souped-up super soldier version, but I'll never complain about looking at Chris Evans under any circumstances. And surprise Dominic Cooper as Howard Stark!
Like I said, it was mostly just Cap kicking ass, which is ultimately what I paid to see. The script was better, or at least more polished, than in Thor, but it too was, in large part, carried by the actors. What was most interesting was that it felt like, rather than telling a story about becoming a hero, as in most origin stories, it was trying to tell a story about being a hero and a symbol and all that entails. Which would have been amazing if it'd been a little more focused. While the film was exciting and the characters interesting, it felt a little rushed and lacked an emotional center.
That being said, I absolutely loved the style. Again, this should come as no surprise to anyone. It was equal parts cool, gritty 1940s and shiny, tech-y science fiction, exactly as it should be. The music, too, was perfect. It had a big, heroic orchestral score, in almost direct contrast, I thought, to the hipper, edgier rock soundtrack of the Iron Man movies. Overall, it was a really beautiful film.
As with all the connected Marvel films, there's an end-credits scene. This time, though, it's the actual teaser trailer for The Avengers. Can it be next May, now?
Wow. This post hits almost all of my major tags.
Now I'm going to go do dishes, eat dinner, and watch Weeds.
Living Situation, tl;dr:
Last summer, I interned with a youth theatre company in Australia, and I had one of those epic, self-realization face palm moments. I realized that I have, in fact, wanted to be an actor since I was 12 years-old, and the only thing keeping me from doing that was this abstract fear of being perceived as naive or frivolous, born out of the working/middle-class mentality toward art, and my dad's voice in my head saying, "There are a lot of actors waiting tables in New York." Subsequent realizations were (a) I'm not actually afraid of that, (b) that mentality is wrong, and (c) I am willing to what I have to in order to pursue a life of art. I resolved then and there that, upon finishing grad school, I would move someplace civilized and become an actor.
The resolution gradually became a vague plan, as I started thinking about the places I could go and what kind of acting I wanted to do. Enter Roommate R, a friend from high school, living in Minneapolis and working as a professional actor and choreographer. He mentioned on Facebook that he was working on a show (Tommy, if memory serves), and I, only sort of joking, said, "I'm just going to quit school and move up there and work with you, ok?" To which he replied, "DO IT!" This led to actual conversations about the possibility of my moving in.
There was lots of back and forth and frantic planning, but, long story short, I packed up my tiny car and drove from south Mississippi to central Minnesota, where I now reside.
The house is a very lovely, very old Victorian right smack in the middle of the city. This means a couple of things:
1) We're right off one of the main roads and can see the interstate from the window, so the sound of traffic is constant.
2) There is no air conditioning, which is only a problem when the weather gets, oh, like it's been for the past few weeks. I've been sleeping naked, with the window open and the fan on high, and I've still been sticking to the sheets.
3) There is no dishwasher.
4) There is only one bathroom.
5) Everything I could possibly need is within 10 miles.
6) The parts of the house that haven't been restored are a little rundown; the parts that have are gorgeous.
I live in a tiny room on the second floor with Roommate R, his wife Roommate A, and their dog Sophie, who is in need of perpetual love and attention and sheds like you would not believe. The Best Landlady Ever (BLE) lives downstairs with her two cats (One of whom is called Nightshade, and I haven't met the other one.), a retriever-chow mix named Jack, and, sometimes, her boyfriend, Roadie. (So referred to because he's a sound guy for rock bands. He was working on the Poison tour, but he got fired because the drummer didn't like him. He's got steady work when Brett Michaels tours solo, though.)
There is some hilarity that comes with three people sharing a bathroom, with which I will regale you at a future time. And one day I'm going to take a picture of the dishes that pile up as a result of not having a dishwasher.
I have a job working as a temp for Big Bank, doing filing and data entry. It's full time, pays okay, and the people are all really nice. Their dress code is business casual, but they're super laid back about tattoos, piercings, and dyed hair, which means that I will probably be twice tattooed and half blonde again at some point in the foreseeable future. Plus, the office is four blocks from out house, so I can walk to work. One of the other temps was told the position was for 18 months. Fingers crossed.
In the meantime, I'm booking auditions and applying for design jobs. No major developments to report on that front, though Roommate R put my name is for costume design on a show he's choreographing. Send good karma.
Dragon*Con, costuming, and body image. tl;dr:
I have a question for you, flist.
I made three costumes for the con: Dr. Girlfriend, Lady au Pair, and Red Riding Hood.
The thing is, I'm re-thinking the Red costume because:
(a) it didn't turn out as well as I would have liked,
(b) not bringing it would free up a ton of space in my very full suitcase,
(c) the boots, which are necessary to the outfit, will kill my feet,
(d) Red Riding Hood is kind of done, and
(e) steampunk is definitely done.
On the other hand:
(a) I worked really hard on it,
(b) it still looks bad-ass, and
(c) if I don't wear it I'll only have two costumes, both from The Venture Bros., unless I dig something else out of my closet.
I'll probably wind up wearing it for Halloween, regardless, because the bar is considerably lower for parties than for cons. I don't know. What do you think?
I'm also thinking I should try to lose some weight before D*C, mostly because of the Dr. Girlfriend costume. It looks great, and I have a system to cover some of the more... unsightly features of my figure. Still, if I resolve to tone myself up enough to be able to wear it without support garments, then I have a clear, concrete goal and a reasonable time frame. I'm fairly certain I can do it, physically, and if I don't have the discipline to maintain a workout routine for a month, then I have failed in more than just health matters.
Does anybody have any tips or resources for weight-loss/muscle toning diets and routines? If not, I may have to either start jogging, which I really don't want to do, or swallow the cost and join a gym. I generally eat like a tiny hippy rabbit, so it's really just a matter of, y'know, moving.
On the subject of appearance and body-image, I had a weird moment the other day. For the past few weeks, my skin and hair have been... not up to par. My acne's been unmanageable, and my hair, which I can normally persuade to be soft and shiny come hell or high water, was just not. I don't know if it's because of the weather or stress or hormones or what, but I just looked like a wreck, no matter what I did. Then, all of a sudden, I woke up Thursday morning and it was fine. My acne started to clear up overnight, and my hair hung exactly the way it was supposed to. (I even got a compliment on how shiny it was!) That morning, I went through my long and complicated beauty routine and looked in the mirror and thought, "There. That's what I'm supposed to look like."
It wasn't even a sense of pride or accomplishment, really. Not, "Wow, I look good today." It was a sense of relief, like I was finally able to look like myself. It was probably a combination of all of the above. The heat finally broke, my birth control (which wreaks havoc with my skin) was getting out of my system, and I'd finally got a job. Plus - and I think this contributes more to the specific feeling - I'd been out of place for the past few months. I stayed with my parents through June, and I never feel comfortable dressing like I normally do, there. Then I was in a new house in a city I'd never been to with people I only kind of knew, which would throw anybody off their game.
I have trouble articulating why looking a certain way is so important to me. It's not a matter of being fashionable or of conforming to particular style. It's about looking good, yes, but it's more than that. It's about looking like me. Smarter people than me have talked about the ways in which people express themselves through their clothes and appearance, but, for me, it's this weirdly intense need. Maybe it's because I wasn't able to express myself for so long that, as with so many other things, I have a deep fear of losing that freedom.
It could also be that I'm shallow, vain, and insecure, but that's a very negative interpretation and I don't do negative.
Art, tl;dr:
I realize that saying, "I don't know if this idea is good" is basically just saying, "I'm an artist", but I don't feel that way about all my ideas. Like, when I have an idea for an academic paper, I know it's good. I may not do it, or it may not be feasible, but I know it's a concept worth pursuing. With art, all I have is the drive to follow the rabbit down the hole and see where I end up. Sometimes I follow the rabbit, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I get to Wonderland, and sometimes I don't get anywhere. It depends on a lot of things, but I never know if the idea was good to begin with. Even things I've finished and am proud of, I never know.
Which is, of course, to say that I'm not working on anything, atm, but I have Ideas. I'm hoping I get the job designing the show that Roommate R is working on, because there's this one costume that would be an absolute pleasure to slave over. I'm also thinking about costumes for next year's cons; how they'd look, logistics, etc. Right now, the list of considerations is Rachel from Blade Runner, Romana from classic Doctor Who, a Stranger from The Venture Bros., or Bellatrix Lestrange. (No, you're not getting a link for that one.) They all have their problems and considerations, but anyone of them would be a lot of fun and a real challenge. I realize it'll be at least a year before I go to another con, but I would need to start working on costumes, like, last week, especially if I do any of these.
Thoughts, suggestions, and comments are welcome. Updates on the situation as it develops.
I have another, much more conceptual idea for a long-term art/media project, but I'm going to keep that close to my chest, for now. Does anybody know of a free (or easily, illegally obtained) user-friendly song writing program? I've used one before, but I don't remember what it was called. Alternatively, does anyone know any musicians/song writers who'd be willing to collaborate on an unbelievably insane venture?
Captain America (no spoilers), tl;dr:
It should come as no surprise to anyone that I found the original, skinny version of Steve Rogers slightly more attractive than the souped-up super soldier version, but I'll never complain about looking at Chris Evans under any circumstances. And surprise Dominic Cooper as Howard Stark!
Like I said, it was mostly just Cap kicking ass, which is ultimately what I paid to see. The script was better, or at least more polished, than in Thor, but it too was, in large part, carried by the actors. What was most interesting was that it felt like, rather than telling a story about becoming a hero, as in most origin stories, it was trying to tell a story about being a hero and a symbol and all that entails. Which would have been amazing if it'd been a little more focused. While the film was exciting and the characters interesting, it felt a little rushed and lacked an emotional center.
That being said, I absolutely loved the style. Again, this should come as no surprise to anyone. It was equal parts cool, gritty 1940s and shiny, tech-y science fiction, exactly as it should be. The music, too, was perfect. It had a big, heroic orchestral score, in almost direct contrast, I thought, to the hipper, edgier rock soundtrack of the Iron Man movies. Overall, it was a really beautiful film.
As with all the connected Marvel films, there's an end-credits scene. This time, though, it's the actual teaser trailer for The Avengers. Can it be next May, now?
Wow. This post hits almost all of my major tags.
Now I'm going to go do dishes, eat dinner, and watch Weeds.