and i dont kno

[shadowedsoul18]

well i have felt shitty since anns wedding....not physically but mentally and emotionally. i mean after all i was told by jen and ppl about waht i did all what happened i hate my life. i wish i could go back and not have drank and done all that shit. because now my whole family....cousins aunts and uncles hate me and are disappointed in me. and that alone sucks more than anything in the world. and i feel soo embarressed and aweful for everything i did, said and everything that happened. and i know theres no way to make up for it all and im jus really really sry for it all. and believe me i learned my leasson.....i will never drink again until im 21 and even then i wont drink as much as i did at the wedding. because there is no reason to ever get that drunk it gets you no where in life. and ppl are always like "yaH i got Hammered this weekend it was effin awesome" and stuff like that thinking they are all cool. but its not and its not worth it. becasue like now there are things about my own sisters wedding that i cant remember and that also makes me really sad. cuz thats not something that happens over and over again. But i can promise and I really mean it that i WILL NOT drink or even sip alcohol again until im 21. and that i sincerly mean it...a lot of people may not believe me but i wont. i dont like feeling this way and knowing ppl were mad, disappointed and weirded out by my actions. it really upsets me specially cuz i cant fix it and have to live with my stupidness for the rest of my life.

so kids i leave u with this...dont drink b4 your 21 its not worth it...its not worth not being able to have a good time and remembering it all.

peace kids