i fucking suck

[shadowcandy]

everything's falling apart.
everyone is leaving me.
soon i'll be left with no on and nothing.
my closest friends hate me now...
and i fear that i will soon lose the love of my life.
the best thing that has ever happened to me.
the one person who keeps me sane.
the one who can make my day better with one smile.
and make me smile with one silly face or eskimo kiss,
the person that understand me the most.
the only person i feel comfortable asking questions with out feeling stupid.
the only person that has ever made me feel beautiful and comfortable in my own skin.
the one boy who i've made it this far with.
the one boy who i can't see my self with out.
the one boy who i could happily stay with forever.
he's the only person i let into my dark spot.
the crazy part of me.
and he doesn't mind that i'm a little crazy.
he's willing to help me with it.
and understand it.
i've never been this scared in my intire life.
i've never wanted anything so badly.
if this ends...
i don't know what will become of me.
and i don't like that feeling.

i'm so scared i'm going to lose the best thing that has ever happened to me.
i'm going to hate myself forever if i do.
i have something so perfect for me right in front of me...
and it can be gone in seconds.