Out of time [fic]
Title: Out of time
Author: shadowbyrd
Rating: PG - 13
Pairing: Tosh/Owen, mentions of Jack/Tosh and Owen/other
Word Count: 1395
Summary: You only live once. Sometimes it isn't enough.
Prompt: 11. Thought I needed this. for un_love_you
A/N: Despite the title, actually has nothing to do with the episode "Out of Time". Many thanks to laligin for beta'ing. Any remaining mistakes are all me, baby.
It's a few minutes to midnight, according to the clock on Owen's dashboard. Tosh is sitting in the front seat, head propped against the window, every shudder the wheels make over the road playing across her skull. They're on their way to search an office building one of the victims worked at. It's one of the flash new ones, where half the walls are glass and Owen has been cracking jokes about the Hub and making snide remarks about Jack's taste in interior design.
Tosh looks at Owen at the corner of her eyes, caught in profile, under the stripes of light, dark, light, dark from the yellow street lamps.
She goes through phases with Owen; she likes him and then she doesn't. One month she can't help but follow him with her eyes. The next he's her best friend and nothing more; someone to drink and gossip and take the piss with.
She isn't sure where she is just now - but it's mostly irrelevant anyway.
Owen parks just outside the building (no doubt flouting a few traffic laws in the process), leaving Tosh to switch off the radio. As they approach the doors, Owen jogs just ahead and opens the door for her, making a grand gesture with his hand. "Ladies first," he says, waggling his eyebrows at her.
She smiles at him and ducks through the door and up the stair case, Owen following.
“Very gentlemanly of you,” Tosh remarks over her shoulder.
“You know me, Tosh. Always appreciate a good view.” He laughs, giving her a friendly slap on the small of her back.
She's meant to laugh along. Instead she rolls her eyes. Every time she’s with someone she hopes it will be different, that this time he won't do anything or say anything.
Every time she's disappointed.
Back at the Hub things are winding down, though not in the way that they'd like; there's nothing more to be done at the moment. All their leads have dried up and the instruments that Toshiko's calibrating are a last resort.
Gwen and Ianto are going through some files together, and probably gossiping the way they're sniggering and she's elbowing him. Owen has taken up residence by her work station, leaning on the edge of the desk, just watching her work. She almost wishes he were prattling on about some night out, or bitching about the rest of the team. Owen being quiet is just unnerving.
"So," he says eventually. "How are you getting on?"
"Not bad."
"You reckon you'll be done in time for a drink later?"
A frown pulls at the corner of Toshiko's mouth and she shakes her head. "I think I'm going to be here a while."
Owen swallows and starts to say something, but then Jack nudges his way between them, his back to Owen. It looks like he’s being possessive, but more likely it's Jack being painfully oblivious. "We all set?"
Tosh flashes him a smile, because she can. "Just about," she says, returning to her instruments.
Jack returns her smile and nods. "Good." He shuffles a little closer. "What about you?"
Tosh scrunches her nose. "I think I probably will stay. Y'know, when and if anything happens."
Jack's smile widens. "Excellent."
When he walks off to talk with Gwen and Ianto, Owen stares after him for a moment. Turning back to Tosh he asks, a slight but definite edge to his voice, "How are things with the good Captain?"
"Not bad," she says, lightly.
Owen nods in that knowing way (which, when not being used in a conversation about relationships, Tosh and Ianto have decided means that he has no idea what's going on) and drifts off to join Gwen and Ianto.
*
She keeps thinking recently about back when Jack first brought him back to the Hub and introduced him to them. He wasn’t really any different from how he is now; blunt, crude and angry. And yet - there was something to him then, something brighter and yet painfully put on. Like he wanted to try to be someone else, who didn’t have so much to be angry about, someone who still had time and energy for sympathy.
Someone who made the absolute worst puns to break the ice.
"They do say it's the way you tell them," Jack had observed at another scuppered punchline.
Owen had been sheepish for about three seconds, then, spotting Tosh sniggering behind her hand, he snatched her up around her waist and spun her around to hear her shriek and laugh. Just because he could.
(She still hopes that wasn’t put on. She had liked that.)
He’s gotten better at his wisecracking - there’s plenty in this job for him to wise-crack about. His timing on the other hand, has stayed bad.
*
It isn't too long before things drift a bit with Jack. It doesn't have much to do with Owen. Or indeed, much to do with Toshiko; Jack has a bit of a butterfly mind at times.
From the way Gwen's eye flick from her to Jack whenever they're talking and Ianto’s glances of vague sympathy she knows that it's got around.
During the morning meeting in the board room Toshiko glances across at Owen. Not a dicky bird. He keeps his back to her and barely looks at her, even when she's speaking. It's genuine this time - she's acted as his wingman enough times to know when he's just trying to "play it cool". It continues the rest of the day; he is friendly in passing, casual and about as good natured as Owen can be without the foundations of reality being altered too significantly.
They go out for drinks later, just the two of them, and Owen spends half the night chatting up a girl with black and red hair.
All back to normal.
*
He couldn’t keep up the act long - no one can at Torchwood unless they’re like Jack and in character 24/7. He broke after nearly two weeks.
Toshiko still watches him, though.
The thing with Jack comes back a few weeks later, when it’s quietened down a bit at work. If she were to be uncharitable she would say that he'd picked her up again out of boredom.
As for Owen - it's like flicking a switch.
Suddenly he's back to hanging around at her workstation, sending her flirty winks and every now and then giving her surprisingly sweet remarks about how nice she looks.
And he doesn't even know that he's doing it.
Toshiko wants to scream.
* * *
She doesn't actually mean to say it - she just wants him to be quiet, to stop screaming like he's already in his death throes because she can't listen to that, and they've each of them only got minutes left -
He goes very quiet after that. Maybe he's finally realised all those "I love you"s weren't pity, "all in the moment" or "I love you as a friend".
She’s almost surprised he still remembers their never-date.
"We sort of missed each other." His voice echoes off the walls. If she closed her eyes she could almost pretend that he was here in the autopsy room, blowing up rats. Back where he belonged. "It was my fault. I didn't...I didn't notice until it was too late. I'm sorry."
"Me too." She should have once, just once, called him on his bullshit. She should have asked him out sooner - any day could have been their last.
There's a hiss and Owen murmuring "Oh God," over and over, and then nothing.
There's another voice echoing off the walls and she can't help but smile at the somewhat blurred sight of Jack. It's all very funny when you think about it. Bloody hilarious, really.
Staring up into Jack's face, all the colours running together, she smiles wider, remembering how Owen picked her up and twirled her around and almost crashed into the autopsy table.
She had liked that. The way he smiled at her, just because she was smiling. It felt like something.
But then, if it was - if he'd ever really felt anything like that for her, and all that time it hadn’t been just a bit of jealousy - why were they dying saying “we missed each other” and not “I love you”?
His timing always was bloody awful. Right up ‘til the very -
Author: shadowbyrd
Rating: PG - 13
Pairing: Tosh/Owen, mentions of Jack/Tosh and Owen/other
Word Count: 1395
Summary: You only live once. Sometimes it isn't enough.
Prompt: 11. Thought I needed this. for un_love_you
A/N: Despite the title, actually has nothing to do with the episode "Out of Time". Many thanks to laligin for beta'ing. Any remaining mistakes are all me, baby.
It's a few minutes to midnight, according to the clock on Owen's dashboard. Tosh is sitting in the front seat, head propped against the window, every shudder the wheels make over the road playing across her skull. They're on their way to search an office building one of the victims worked at. It's one of the flash new ones, where half the walls are glass and Owen has been cracking jokes about the Hub and making snide remarks about Jack's taste in interior design.
Tosh looks at Owen at the corner of her eyes, caught in profile, under the stripes of light, dark, light, dark from the yellow street lamps.
She goes through phases with Owen; she likes him and then she doesn't. One month she can't help but follow him with her eyes. The next he's her best friend and nothing more; someone to drink and gossip and take the piss with.
She isn't sure where she is just now - but it's mostly irrelevant anyway.
Owen parks just outside the building (no doubt flouting a few traffic laws in the process), leaving Tosh to switch off the radio. As they approach the doors, Owen jogs just ahead and opens the door for her, making a grand gesture with his hand. "Ladies first," he says, waggling his eyebrows at her.
She smiles at him and ducks through the door and up the stair case, Owen following.
“Very gentlemanly of you,” Tosh remarks over her shoulder.
“You know me, Tosh. Always appreciate a good view.” He laughs, giving her a friendly slap on the small of her back.
She's meant to laugh along. Instead she rolls her eyes. Every time she’s with someone she hopes it will be different, that this time he won't do anything or say anything.
Every time she's disappointed.
Back at the Hub things are winding down, though not in the way that they'd like; there's nothing more to be done at the moment. All their leads have dried up and the instruments that Toshiko's calibrating are a last resort.
Gwen and Ianto are going through some files together, and probably gossiping the way they're sniggering and she's elbowing him. Owen has taken up residence by her work station, leaning on the edge of the desk, just watching her work. She almost wishes he were prattling on about some night out, or bitching about the rest of the team. Owen being quiet is just unnerving.
"So," he says eventually. "How are you getting on?"
"Not bad."
"You reckon you'll be done in time for a drink later?"
A frown pulls at the corner of Toshiko's mouth and she shakes her head. "I think I'm going to be here a while."
Owen swallows and starts to say something, but then Jack nudges his way between them, his back to Owen. It looks like he’s being possessive, but more likely it's Jack being painfully oblivious. "We all set?"
Tosh flashes him a smile, because she can. "Just about," she says, returning to her instruments.
Jack returns her smile and nods. "Good." He shuffles a little closer. "What about you?"
Tosh scrunches her nose. "I think I probably will stay. Y'know, when and if anything happens."
Jack's smile widens. "Excellent."
When he walks off to talk with Gwen and Ianto, Owen stares after him for a moment. Turning back to Tosh he asks, a slight but definite edge to his voice, "How are things with the good Captain?"
"Not bad," she says, lightly.
Owen nods in that knowing way (which, when not being used in a conversation about relationships, Tosh and Ianto have decided means that he has no idea what's going on) and drifts off to join Gwen and Ianto.
*
She keeps thinking recently about back when Jack first brought him back to the Hub and introduced him to them. He wasn’t really any different from how he is now; blunt, crude and angry. And yet - there was something to him then, something brighter and yet painfully put on. Like he wanted to try to be someone else, who didn’t have so much to be angry about, someone who still had time and energy for sympathy.
Someone who made the absolute worst puns to break the ice.
"They do say it's the way you tell them," Jack had observed at another scuppered punchline.
Owen had been sheepish for about three seconds, then, spotting Tosh sniggering behind her hand, he snatched her up around her waist and spun her around to hear her shriek and laugh. Just because he could.
(She still hopes that wasn’t put on. She had liked that.)
He’s gotten better at his wisecracking - there’s plenty in this job for him to wise-crack about. His timing on the other hand, has stayed bad.
*
It isn't too long before things drift a bit with Jack. It doesn't have much to do with Owen. Or indeed, much to do with Toshiko; Jack has a bit of a butterfly mind at times.
From the way Gwen's eye flick from her to Jack whenever they're talking and Ianto’s glances of vague sympathy she knows that it's got around.
During the morning meeting in the board room Toshiko glances across at Owen. Not a dicky bird. He keeps his back to her and barely looks at her, even when she's speaking. It's genuine this time - she's acted as his wingman enough times to know when he's just trying to "play it cool". It continues the rest of the day; he is friendly in passing, casual and about as good natured as Owen can be without the foundations of reality being altered too significantly.
They go out for drinks later, just the two of them, and Owen spends half the night chatting up a girl with black and red hair.
All back to normal.
*
He couldn’t keep up the act long - no one can at Torchwood unless they’re like Jack and in character 24/7. He broke after nearly two weeks.
Toshiko still watches him, though.
The thing with Jack comes back a few weeks later, when it’s quietened down a bit at work. If she were to be uncharitable she would say that he'd picked her up again out of boredom.
As for Owen - it's like flicking a switch.
Suddenly he's back to hanging around at her workstation, sending her flirty winks and every now and then giving her surprisingly sweet remarks about how nice she looks.
And he doesn't even know that he's doing it.
Toshiko wants to scream.
* * *
She doesn't actually mean to say it - she just wants him to be quiet, to stop screaming like he's already in his death throes because she can't listen to that, and they've each of them only got minutes left -
He goes very quiet after that. Maybe he's finally realised all those "I love you"s weren't pity, "all in the moment" or "I love you as a friend".
She’s almost surprised he still remembers their never-date.
"We sort of missed each other." His voice echoes off the walls. If she closed her eyes she could almost pretend that he was here in the autopsy room, blowing up rats. Back where he belonged. "It was my fault. I didn't...I didn't notice until it was too late. I'm sorry."
"Me too." She should have once, just once, called him on his bullshit. She should have asked him out sooner - any day could have been their last.
There's a hiss and Owen murmuring "Oh God," over and over, and then nothing.
There's another voice echoing off the walls and she can't help but smile at the somewhat blurred sight of Jack. It's all very funny when you think about it. Bloody hilarious, really.
Staring up into Jack's face, all the colours running together, she smiles wider, remembering how Owen picked her up and twirled her around and almost crashed into the autopsy table.
She had liked that. The way he smiled at her, just because she was smiling. It felt like something.
But then, if it was - if he'd ever really felt anything like that for her, and all that time it hadn’t been just a bit of jealousy - why were they dying saying “we missed each other” and not “I love you”?
His timing always was bloody awful. Right up ‘til the very -