guilty as charged.
maybe not all of us, but i would venture to say that most of us have atleast one of these people in our lives. we hate admit it, but its undeniable that we all know a person or two who treats us so unlike we should be treated. they make us miserable, make us cry, and generally break our hearts into pieces. the mystery lies not in why we initially let them in(for everything always looks so good at the start) but why we keep allowing them to return. we all know that we should cast them away for the emotional and physical benefit of ourselves;however something everytime keeps us from doing so. something everytime keeps us telling ourselves how THIS will be the last time we let them walk all over us-and as we always discover, it never really is.
so what is it? is it the naive hopeful mindset we all seem to have that keeps us believing that "maybe they will change, maybe things will go back to how things were in the beginning, maybe..." whatever it is,it keeps us giving them second, third, and four hundred and sixty six chances. so if they do hurt so much, why do our hearts skip a beat when we see their phone number scroll across our caller id? at times it can really feel like an addiction. they have a hold on our lives and as much as we know and we should liberate our selves from the hurt we know we will be setting ourselves up to...we just cant let go. its a slow agonizing process. we listen to our friends tell how we should let the person go, how the person is wrong for us and how they dont want to see us get hurt again. we nod and agree and say we will change...but deep down we are just waiting for one more chance to prove our friends wrong. we never do change. they are always right. its always easier looking from the outside in. but once youre in, its near impossible to get out.
whats really tough is that most of the time, these people could care less that we care about them. they are generally apathetic and have their own agenda.(one that rarely concerns us) the most defying question of all tho, is how they can move on so fast with so much disregard. how can we spend so much time with them, making memories and building a relationship that could seemingly go on forever, and just like that its over...and when they say over they mean over. yet we sit like an abandoned puppy, big eyed and full of tears, watching our owner drive miles away without one look back.
so because of all this, we are viewed as dumb girls or guys. deserving of the treatment we receive because it is our own fault that we brought it upon ourselves. maybe so. maybe we could help to stop it if we REALLY tried. i admit i have one of these people in my life. one i keep letting back in when i should really for the sake of my emotional health, be casting out. at times i think i am through, just like them, however i quickly find they still have a slight hold on me. i am guilty as charged. but until you have one of these people in your life- you wont know how truly hard it is to break free. that is, unless you are one of those people.
in that case, screw you.
so what is it? is it the naive hopeful mindset we all seem to have that keeps us believing that "maybe they will change, maybe things will go back to how things were in the beginning, maybe..." whatever it is,it keeps us giving them second, third, and four hundred and sixty six chances. so if they do hurt so much, why do our hearts skip a beat when we see their phone number scroll across our caller id? at times it can really feel like an addiction. they have a hold on our lives and as much as we know and we should liberate our selves from the hurt we know we will be setting ourselves up to...we just cant let go. its a slow agonizing process. we listen to our friends tell how we should let the person go, how the person is wrong for us and how they dont want to see us get hurt again. we nod and agree and say we will change...but deep down we are just waiting for one more chance to prove our friends wrong. we never do change. they are always right. its always easier looking from the outside in. but once youre in, its near impossible to get out.
whats really tough is that most of the time, these people could care less that we care about them. they are generally apathetic and have their own agenda.(one that rarely concerns us) the most defying question of all tho, is how they can move on so fast with so much disregard. how can we spend so much time with them, making memories and building a relationship that could seemingly go on forever, and just like that its over...and when they say over they mean over. yet we sit like an abandoned puppy, big eyed and full of tears, watching our owner drive miles away without one look back.
so because of all this, we are viewed as dumb girls or guys. deserving of the treatment we receive because it is our own fault that we brought it upon ourselves. maybe so. maybe we could help to stop it if we REALLY tried. i admit i have one of these people in my life. one i keep letting back in when i should really for the sake of my emotional health, be casting out. at times i think i am through, just like them, however i quickly find they still have a slight hold on me. i am guilty as charged. but until you have one of these people in your life- you wont know how truly hard it is to break free. that is, unless you are one of those people.
in that case, screw you.