Thoughts of Spring at the beginning of Fall...
A kind of lyrical ecstasy possesses young Americans in the Springtime, a feeling of not belonging in any one place or in any one moment, a wild restless longing to be elsewhere, everywhere, now!"
-Jack Kerouac
I put a sweater on today. My big, fuzzy, charcoal grey security blanket. I love fall. The cool mornings where, with your windows wide open, you can curl up with a blanket and take in the crisp fresh air. No humidity, no loud fan...just air.
Though I am taking in my favorite season with unabashed ferver...my thoughts turn to spring. Apparently, I am taking a journey back to San Francisco and Sarah would like to come along. Oh to be back in that city...the people, the weather, the experience. I've thought about it a lot lately. The east coast seems so unhealthy anymore. As if it would suck the life out of me. I don't know, SF just seems like somewhere I could actually grow. I've been recalling the time I spent there...hunting down the real world house, buying my first pair of pewter platforms, Girardelli square, the beach. It was like magic. And to share that experience with someone who has never been thrills me completely. Like opening another window to my soul. A place I clicked.
Perhaps I am romanticizing it? Maybe I am just growing more restless to leave here than I thought I was. I'm getting ahead of myself.
First, a vacation, then we will see if it's meant to be. A year seems like such a long time. But, I guess it really isn't. It's been a year since Kraig's birthday. Wish reminds me, I need to make a call tomorrow. Wednesday will be a year since Sarah and I met. A year.
A year since I began this journey of finding me. Re-finding me. But I think the proverbial game of hide and seek is over now. I'm no longer a child. I will no longer live in these predetermined molds others have tried to place me in - that I have tried to fit in for fear of failure. In the end, I only failed to recognize myself and my own happiness. Rebirth.
So, I guess as much as it is fall, it is spring for me. Refreshed and anew. Ready to drink in the world and it's bitter sweetness.
Among other things.
-Jack Kerouac
I put a sweater on today. My big, fuzzy, charcoal grey security blanket. I love fall. The cool mornings where, with your windows wide open, you can curl up with a blanket and take in the crisp fresh air. No humidity, no loud fan...just air.
Though I am taking in my favorite season with unabashed ferver...my thoughts turn to spring. Apparently, I am taking a journey back to San Francisco and Sarah would like to come along. Oh to be back in that city...the people, the weather, the experience. I've thought about it a lot lately. The east coast seems so unhealthy anymore. As if it would suck the life out of me. I don't know, SF just seems like somewhere I could actually grow. I've been recalling the time I spent there...hunting down the real world house, buying my first pair of pewter platforms, Girardelli square, the beach. It was like magic. And to share that experience with someone who has never been thrills me completely. Like opening another window to my soul. A place I clicked.
Perhaps I am romanticizing it? Maybe I am just growing more restless to leave here than I thought I was. I'm getting ahead of myself.
First, a vacation, then we will see if it's meant to be. A year seems like such a long time. But, I guess it really isn't. It's been a year since Kraig's birthday. Wish reminds me, I need to make a call tomorrow. Wednesday will be a year since Sarah and I met. A year.
A year since I began this journey of finding me. Re-finding me. But I think the proverbial game of hide and seek is over now. I'm no longer a child. I will no longer live in these predetermined molds others have tried to place me in - that I have tried to fit in for fear of failure. In the end, I only failed to recognize myself and my own happiness. Rebirth.
So, I guess as much as it is fall, it is spring for me. Refreshed and anew. Ready to drink in the world and it's bitter sweetness.
Among other things.