Supernatural Episode Review - 4x03 - In The Beginning
DEAR GOD LJ WAS BROKEN FOR LIKE THE LAST HOUR AND I COULDN'T POST OR DO THE MUSIC!!!
AHHHH!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!! I’ve been trying desperately to express myself and not gratuitously use that word, and it’s JUST NOT FUCKING WORKING. SO I WILL FOREWARN - THIS POST WILL HAVE COMPLETE AND TOTAL SENTENCES WHERE WORDS END WITH MASSIVE !!!!’s AND CAPS LOCK-SICKNESS AND GRATUITOUS USE OF THE WORD FUCK. JUST FYI! I CANNOT EXPRESS MY GLEE FOR THIS EPISODE ENOUGH. LIKE EVER. AT ALL. FOR SERIOUS. I HAVE NOT BEEN THIS EXCITED OVER THIS SHOW SINCE SEASON 2 (AGAIN, NOT THAT ONE COULD BE EXCITED MUCH LAST YEAR WHAT WITH THE HUMONGOUS LACK OF EPISODES - WHICH ALSO MAKES ME WONDER HOW THIS WOULD HAVE PANNED OUT IF IN FACT, IT DID HAPPEN THAT LAST YEAR WE GOT ALL 22 EPISODES INSTEAD OF THE ONES WE GOT - BUT ANYWAY). I’M LITERALLY SHAKING. AND I DON’T DO THAT OFTEN. I FEEL ALL A-FLUTTER.
*ahem*
Excuse me. *coughs* I may get…slightly out of hand and over the top. I will try my hardest to be coherent and review-y.
As a side-note: Seeing Tom Welling in a suit every week is kinda wigging me out after like 12 years of flannel…just sayin’. Dean Cain, he is not. And I agree - whole-heartedly - I feel as though this Lois & Clark do not have the chemistry of like…all of them before them. It’s just…wrong. I don’t buy it - and I don’t even watch the show.
Right then - here we go (THIS EPISODE WAS AWESOME! PURE GENIUS!)
The Then: MOMMY WINCHESTER! FWEEE BABY SAMMY! DEMON BLOOD AND JARED’S KINDA - BAD ACTING AND MARY KNOWS FRED! Burning Mommy - Mommy’s sorry and HOLY HOTNESS ANGEL CASTIEL. (There is something SO WRONG with the fact that I find the way he says “perdition” to be a form of foreplay). Fred dying by the super-Colt. Castiel and THE MISSION.
Now: Dean’s schleeeeeeeeping and Sam looks…evil. Dear GOD please don’t turn evil. I mean, I dig the hot, that’s not it, but dude…come on. He sneaks out (or rather, he sort of lumbers out - the man’s a giant and he’s sort of totally putting on the shoulder routine here - so right) of the Willow Motel to rendezvous with Ruby; I’m assuming to suck some more black smoke. Yup. Ugh. Don’t like her. And…what happened to her not wanting anything to do with this? Like…really - didn’t she not want anything to do with the whole Angel/Dean/Sam triangle? Didn’t she bail? (Forcing Sam to forget THE PIE?!?!) I’m…what?
This is the motel from…what was it, Scarecrow? And Shadow - the beginning anyway. I’m sure of it actually.
Dean’s having some more creepy ass red-tinted dreams. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM MISHA - that must be a signal now - red-tinted dreams = angel coming. There’s this shot of black eyes I think too (actually upon a second/third&fourth viewing, it’s just Dean’s eyes closed I think) - and I’m hoping that’s just the form that angels take - I’d assume, like in movies such as The Prophecy, that since technically, angels are both God-following & God-fallen, that they have similar forms…wouldn’t you think? Like at it’s base’s core - it’d be the same essence? Like black smoke with wings? *snort* His Most Holy Hotness asks Dean what he was dreaming about and does this awesome turn that’s both creepy and totally non-human like…in a totally sexy way - how many people can pull that off?!? Dean’s mumbling something about him getting off watching people sleep and dude - just admit that you were totally dreaming of having sex with him on a cloud or some shit - I’m sure he’d be totally cool with it. I have yet to read any Dean/Castiel or any pairings in which Castiel is with the boys, but I think I should start trying to find some, stat. He tells Dean he has to stop it and then touches two fingers to his forehead, and suddenly Dean’s in hippy-land being told that he cannot sleep on a park bench by a rogue 70’s cop that looks more like a rent-a-cop that’s had about 1,200 too-many doughnuts. It’s not immediately apparent that Castiel has landed him in hippy-land, but the TAB on the bench and the BELL BOTTOMS might be a slight indication. However, Dean’s got Daddy’s journal and his cell phone (with no signal - like exactly what can he do with it then? Dial 777-ANGEL and have Castiel pop up? Listen to some Jamie Dunlap tunes while grooving the bell bottoms & wide collars?). I will also point out, that upon this second viewing, Dean never thinks to look to see if Sam is in the other bed when His Most Holy Hotness is suddenly a perching Tom on his bed. Like - that might have been my first reaction as I’m talking to an angel - I’d check to see if Sam is awake and WATCHING. Anyway - Jay Bird’s Diner is also advertised on the bench and perhaps that’s why Dean goes there - even though he never looks at said advertisements.
“Ramblin’ Man” is playing upon Dean’s entrance to Jay Bird’s Diner and I am appalled. COME ON, KRIPKE - NO REPEATS! IT’S SO UNLAWFUL TO USE THE SAME SONG TWICE. I THINK THERE WERE PLENTY OF SONGS IN THE 70’S THAT COULD HAVE BEEN USED HERE. YOUR NEW SEASON IS AWESOME SO FAR - PLEASE KEEP THE MUSIC BEING AWESOME AS WELL. K, THANKS, BYE.
Dean sits down and he’s slightly confused. He asks a turns-out-to-be-not-so-random-patron where the hell he is exactly and said random relative tells him he’s at Jay Bird’s Diner, in Lawrence, Kansas. Random diner-dude is kinda hot (‘cept for the 50’s hair - it sort of looks like plastic or a Ken-doll). And I have to say, I did not see this one coming. I may be the densest person in the room at the moment, but I was FLOORED when I finally figured this out. Actually, this dude kinda looks like Jonathan Schaech…only better proportioned. Random diner-dude DADDY gets his boy a coffee and Dean insults the…what is he exactly in the 70’s? He’s not a soda-jerk and he’s not a waiter…whatever - the counter guy is wearing some serious disco shit and Dean breaks his father’s heart by making it known that Sonny & Cher do break up. Turns out he’s in 1973 - April 30th to be exact. Dean’s all waaaaaaaaaait a minute here. There’s so much polyester in here you could start a revival! Didn’t think John was an “I Got You Babe” fan, but…oooooook. Perhaps wife’s death’s do that do you…OH MY GOD HE’S TALKING TO JOHN! HOLY HELL! EEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! (Which was my reaction when I figured this shit out) (Also - I love how they both turn when the dude’s all Hey Winchester!) DAAAAAAAAYYYYUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMM! No wonder the boys are HOTASSES! YOUNG!DADDY!WINCHESTER IS THE SHIT. Dean’s all WTF?! DAD!?!?!?! And CROWS!
WHOOOOOOOHOOOOOO HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I AM SO EXCITED!
Dean’s following HotAssDaddy and this episode is aptly titled: “In the Beginning.” After HotAssDaddy turns the corner, HELLO CASTIEL. I love how his clothes never change. NEVER CHANGE THE CLOTHES OH HOLIER THAN THOU HOTNESS. The tie all half-undone and the white shirt and the long coat are just UHNNNN. *ahem* Dean’s all “Is this real?” and His Most HOLY SEXINESS explains that “Time is fluid” and is bendable on occasion. Dude - I got some stuff I want bent. *ahem* SORRY! Dean’s all - I DON’T WANNA BE BENT HERE - SEND ME BACK! And His Most Holiness tells Dean once again that he has to stop “it.” A car honks and when Dean turns back to look at the face of an angel (*GIGGLES* NO PUN INTENDED! *SNERK*) he’s GONE again. He does that a lot. Dude - if you wanna pop in and out (HEH) of my life, you’re MORE than welcome - my door is always open. My license number is (CENSORED FOR ANGEL’S EYES ONLY) and my number is PLEASE COME FUCK ME. OH OH SON OF A BITCH. Has Dean said that yet this year? I’ve been blinded by all the hotness so far this season that I’ve forgotten to keep a tally.
DADDY’S BUYING A WINNEBAGO *LAUGHS HER ASS OFF* JOHN WINCHESTER IN A WINNEBAGO?!?!!??! WHAT!? Is that where Dean is conceived?! LMAO IN a VAN down by the RIVER!. A 1964 Winnebago no less. And because HotAssDaddy is SUCH a cutiepie, the salesman is gonna give him an extra $250 off the price! Woo? LOL Dean’s all - dude - wrong car - you want this one - it’s the IMPALA!!! Well…that kinda shoots to shit the whole family legacy or restoring it from junk or present from Grandpa Winchester. This proposes a rather circular story and I really should not get on this train of thought, but apparently, I must because…if time is fluid…and Dean goes back continuously - does that mean that the car might not have ever been John’s? What if Dean had not gone back? Would the boys be driving around in a broken-down Winnebago Camper Van?! ROFLMAO
I can just see it now - pot smoke leaking from the cracked window, “Spirit in the Sky” blasting from the radio - “Duuuuude - Saaaaaaaaammmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay - you gotta try this shit - it’s badass!” “Deeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnn-uh. We gotta do that…thing…that stuff we’re supposed to be doin’.” “Whaaaaaaaat? Whatchu talkin’ ‘bout Saaaaaaamaaaaaaaaaay?” “The…stuff. Ya know. That we’re supposed to be doin’!” “Stuff…???? Stuff is good Sammmmaaay. This is some good shit.” “No, no, Dean - I’m sure there’s somethin’ we’re apposed…no, no, we’re proposed…no, no…dude…I’m so baked.” LAUGHTER ALL AROUND. “No, Sam, dude, you’re right. There’s somethin’ - I remember…kinda…*INHALES DEEPLY* Dude, we got any Cheetos?” “Yeah, in back, next to the bongs.” “Awesome!” “Dean…I think it was important.” “Riiiiiiiiiiiiight, it was somethin’ ‘bout a business…with family…….I think I remember…like……..spirits…or…fuck, man, I dunno - pass me another joint.” “Dean…” “Sammy?” “Can you help me here? I think I just dropped all my fingers.” “No prob, bro - I’ll get ‘em for you. You might wanna lay off those ‘shrooms, though.” AND THEN they can have one of those DUDE! SWEET! moments like in Dude, Where’s My Car?
*ahem* So - time loops - make me wonder about shit like that - perhaps I’ll touch on that a little later - and slightly more seriously than the baked-Winchester brothers. What’s sad? They might have been more comfortable on the road in a moving camper over the Impala. Poor boys.
RAINBOW MOTORS? Could we GET anymore cliché? *SNORTS* Dean starts telling HotAssDaddy about the wonders of the Impala and my eyes glaze over with the car-speak. 70’s John is all about family but he concedes to get the Impala so there’s some part of the John we know and love buried in there. He’s a badass under all that plastic hair. He was just waiting for it to have a reason to bust out. Dean introduces himself as Dean Van Halen, and I snorted. I suppose, on the spot, whatever popped in there, but…yeah. After the intros are over, Dean grills Papa about feeling cold spots, smelling sulfur and cattle mutilations, and by now, it’s a wonder that he hasn’t called the fuzz on his oldest son. LOL Dean tells him to watch out for himself and takes his leave.
HotAss Daddy pulls up to what I assume must be either his or Mary’s house in his brand new Impala and Dean has hijacked a car to trail him. I REALLY wish I knew what kind of car that is that Dean’s driving, but I’ve never been into cars - however, whatever kind of car it is - Jensen looks so FUNNY sitting in this one. I can buy this Jonathan Schaech look-alike as a young John. He has enough of Jeffrey Dean’s look to make it seem plausible. I cannot really say the same for Mom here. I mean, we really had nothing to go on as far as canon Mommy Winchester, but there’s something about this chick that just bugs me. I like Samantha so much better. LOL They briefly discuss the car instead of van route and Dean’s all MOMMY!
Then he stalks them some more. They’re in…Jay Bird’s Diner I think…again…and there must be a real lack of eating establishments in Lawrence. Peeping Dean is musing to himself and to Sam that, “Mom is a babe.” Which he then follows with, “I’m going to hell. Again.” ROFLMAO.
From the doomed lovers table, we can deduce that Mary’s daddy does not care for John - or rather, he’s extremely protective of his blonde…I really don’t think she’s that hot - I must disagree with Dean - offspring. HotAss Daddy thinks it’s because he’s a mechanic from a family of mechanics but apparently that’s not what bothers Mary’s pop. Mary excuses herself and while she’s away, HotAssDaddy’s checking the ring he’s got all ready to give to her. Dean watches in…I’m not sure what his expression really is here…painful remorse? That his parents were happy once? And young? HOLY FUCK MARY’S A KICKASS BITCH! SHE’S TOTALLY KICKING HER LIL BOY’S ASS. Dean of course can’t hit his MOMMY, so he pins her instead and she’s wearing a bracelet that’s filled with supernatural charms and Dean asks her if she’s a hunter. OH MY FUCKING GOD! MOMMY WAS A HUNTER! OH MY GOD! I….OH MY GOD!
…………………………………fieowar3#W@L #D RI#@43q432@$)($*#)#*@K F;weqj/
*HYPERVENTILATES*
HOLY SHIT THE FAMILY BUSINESS IS REALLY ON MARY’S SIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
John pulls up to the Campbell’s mailbox - Mary’s a Campbell. HotAssDaddy drops Mommy off and Dean’s already there. Mary is apprehensive of having Dean come inside, but of course, Dean’s gotta meet Grandpa Campbell. So…did John just never tell the boys at all about their mother’s family? Like…at all? Hunter-parts aside, since he didn’t know…but…yeah.
SKINNER! HEEEEE! HIIIIIIIIIIIII MITCH! I love Mitch. How can you NOT love Mitch!? I mean he was SKINNER! Skinner grills Dean on the proper way to dispatch a vampire. Speaking of vampires…anyone watch True Blood on HBO? This is a completely unnecessary tangent, but…that show is WEIRD. The credits alone nearly made me throw up, develop a serious form of epilepsy and stare open-mouthed at the screen, all while simultaneously bopping to the equally strange theme song. It’s like…Stephenie Meyer on crack…er…heroin, since parts of Breaking Dawn were pure crack. Seriously though…I was kinda offended, being a Twilight fan and all that they basically took pieces of her story and made them “adult.” There’s more sex on that show than softcore porn. Instead of Edward hearing thoughts, it’s Sookie, which…dear GOD whoever decided that name was going to sound good coming out of Stephen Moyer’s fanged-up mouth was seriously channeling some Renesmee-fever. And guess WHAT? Edward Sookie can’t hear Bella BILL. That’s right, they named the goddamn vampire BILL for fuck’s sake. BILL. Bill the vampire. I mean it’s just…and don’t even get me started on Sam - since he is not, now, in fact, THE dog - which if you watch, you’ll know what I’m talking about. However, that does not get us off the whole dog-vibe, since he barks in his sleep and ROLLS AROUND IN DEAD PEOPLE’S BEDS. WTF WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?!?!?!?! Besides the fact that he’s a weird dog-like person or whatever and is in love with Bella Sookie and most likely a werewolf or something. That’s not like Jacob at all. *ahem* Sorry, I just…had to get that out. So, uhm, right then…after the vampire test, we find out that Skinner’s name is Samuel. Deanna? LMAO HEH *Sings* Dean’s named after a giiiiiiiiiiiirl.*Sings* It’s really too bad that Sammy’s not here now - because he could tease Dean mercilessly about the fact he’s named after their grandmother and call him Deanna and shit. Skinner doesn’t trust other hunters - and really, Dean’s kinda like Samuel. I mean, one can find family resemblance, traits.
Over dinner, Dean totally makes Grandpa smile and we learn that John is a naïve civilian. *SNORT* And Skinner is working his own job - the Whitshire farm - Tom Whitshire got chopped up in his own combine while…combining? LOL his dead crop field. Dean asks if they found any information on the web…………..of information. HAHA Apparently the Campbell’s are totally up their signs of DE-monic omens. Electrical storms are perhaps a factor and their weather maps should be there shortly. Dean’s all…dudes - snail mail? He suggest they work together, but Skinner shoots him down.
Oh my GOD - it is a family trait - it’s totally genetic! Skinner and…ya know, I really need a name for Mommy, one that encompasses her non-hotness and annoyance all in one while not detracting from Samantha-as-Mary’s memory. Skinner and the non-mom pull up to what I assume is the Whitshire farm with…is that fruitcake? Skinner stresses the importance of the family business - HA - and they go up to the door….non-mom veering off to talk to the son.
ROFLMAO Dean’s already there as Father SEXASS. HELLO AGAIN! OH MY GOD. I just had the awesomest flash of Father Sexass & Father Sexass Sammy and His Most Holy Hotness Castiel all together doing very naughty things on an altar. *coughs* Dean explains that Father Skinner is the Senior SENIOR priest of their diocese. HEH. Dean relates that Mrs. Whitshire said things were normal on the day before Tom was turned into mulch. Dean leaves Farther Skinner to it and joins non-mom & Charlie, Tom’s son. Charlie says Tommy drank sometimes and roughed up Mom. Some dude came a week ago and asked if he wanted the beatings to stop. The stranger didn’t say he’d want anything, but 10 years down the road he might. Charlie doesn’t know that he just sold his soul. Stranger was normal-looking ‘cept for his creepy-ass Yellow PEEPERS! EEP FRED! Charlie wonders if he’ll go to jail now. *giggles*
Dean’s all - WE ARE ALL IN DANGER - you need to get out while Grandma Deanna *snerk* slices…bananas? For what? Pie? Cereal? Anyway - she’s like a master chef chopping up her nana’s there. Skinner has never heard of a demon with yellow eyes, but of course, Dean has. They argue over whether it’s really a demon or something else and Dean’s adamant it’s Fred and he says they need to get Samuel Colt’s gun and that will kill the demon. Skinner’s all dude - total legend - bedtime story for non-mommy when she was little. Skinner takes that in stride for the moment while he and grandma exchange meaningful looks the whole time. He wonders how Dean’s going to know where the demon will strike. *Holds up finger in triumph* AHA! Dean - he has a list! John’s journal has a list of everyone who came in contact with Fred - the who, the where, the when. Skinner asks the why and Dean relates that John compiled all the information he could so they could find out what killed Mommy. The Whitshire farm is on the list and Dean says that John could see the future when Skinner asks how he knew things that happened only two days ago. HAHA nice save there Dean-o. The list says it will hit Liddy Walsh next. Skinner thinks that Dean seems like a real nice kid, but yeah, he’s a nutcase. HEH Dean’s still going to stop it.
Dean stops by to say goodbye to non-mom he tells her that she and John are meant to be. Ya know, because if they aren’t then he’s sort of a glimmer and probably won’t exist when he gets back to his time unless His Most Holy Hotness makes him exist again and shit. He asks what John is like and non-mom says he’s sweet and kind, even after being in the war and believes in happily ever after - everything a hunter isn’t. ……So…why the whole USMC shirt and stuff? It seems that John was different even before she died - at least the way he was portrayed in episode one. Because let’s face it, he’s kind of a pansy ass in this episode. LOL She knows that he’s going to ask her to marry him and she’ll run away with him if she has to. She loves John and she wants to get out. Mary hates the hunting life. She wants a family. She wants to be safe. The worst thing she can think of is for her kids to be raised like she was. Awwwww. Dean says he needs to tell her something and he needs her to promise that she’ll remember: “On November 2, 1983 - don’t get out of bed. No matter what you hear or what you see, promise me you won’t get out of bed.” *SOBS* *HOLDS DEAN* She promises but we all know she will. There’s even a tear that FALLS OFF HIS FACE. DEAR GOD JENSEN WHAT YOU DO TO ME. MY GOD - I mean…if being smooshed by a SEMI and having your dad give his life for you and being in turmoil because you don’t think you’re worthy WASN’T ENOUGH, compiled with the knowledge that you may have to kill your brother if you can’t save him, ONLY to have him BE killed anyway and then sell your soul for ONE lousy year - at the end of which you totally get MAULED to death by invisible HELLHOUNDS and HANG on hooks in HELL for howeverthefuck long only to be pulled out of said hell by the best-looking angel there is and questioning yet again WHY ME? WASN’T ENOUGH. If the fact that you’ve lost everyone you ever loved and have to cling to the one person that’s left like a LIFELINE hoping that he won’t leave or turn evil WASN’T ENOUGH. If the life that you’re been leading for all eternity and were sick of because it’s all you’ve ever done WASN’T ENOUGH - NOW we have to find out that the one person who we did it all for DIDN’T WANT YOU TO HAVE THAT LIFE AFTER ALL ANYWAY!?!?!?!??!?!!?!??!? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST ON A FUCKING CROSS HOW MUCH MORE CAN THIS ONE GUY TAKE?!?!?!?!??!?!? I feel SO bad for Dean! I mean OBVIOUSLY a mother wouldn’t want that for her children, but for her to TELL HIM. GOD. I have NO WORDS. The complete and utter desolation he must feel sometimes just CONSUMES me FOR him. *throws hands up in the air*
Dean goes off in search of Daniel Elkins and the Colt and there’s his Most Holiest again. Now you see him, now you don’t. We should get him a bell. Dean wonders if God’s his co-pilot now. *snerk* Dean asks why Sam wasn’t brought back with him and The Holiest of Holies says that Dean had to do it alone. Dean wonders if Castiel cares that Sam’s tearing up the future looking for him…but Sam’s not looking for him according to the Epitome of Hot. So…what if Dean was really in trouble? And Sam wasn’t there because he was too busy playing suck the smoke out of a bajillion demons with pseudo-Ruby? Great, that’s probably where we’ll end up with all this. Dean asks what will happen if he gets Fred in this time - if it will break the “family curse” or whatever and John & Mary will be alive and Sam and him will be more normal. The Holy Hot One says that if he alters the future and they never become hunters, everyone they saved will die. Dean realizes this, but it’s his parents and he won’t let them die again. And by the time Dean’s done rationalizing with himself, Castiel is gone again.
Dean’s breaking into a safe or some shit - oh he’s getting the Colt from Daniel. Daniel doesn’t enjoy Dean’s B&E, but Dean’s serious shit and I dunno, he lets him go with the Colt for…some reason. It doesn’t really matter. He tells Daniel where the Campbell’s are - so he can get the gun back I assume, because Dean won’t be there. What’s really the important part here is that Dean just drove from Kansas to Colorado - which even if he’s only going across the Colorado state line to Arapaho, would be a fucking SIX hour drive - nearly 400 miles ONE WAY. I’m not that interested in where Daniel was supposed to live, so I’m not going to look it up - but for FUCK’S sake - it’s a 12-hour drive round trip!!! I mean, at least we had states that were adjoining this week, but STILL. GUYS. PLEASE!
*sigh* Back in Kansas, Skinner and non-mom are polishing and cleaning weapons while Grandma…does something in the kitchen like usual. Skinner lets it slip that it was Liddy that Dean thought Fred was going after and she’s outta there ready to go save her while Skinner muses that she’s hormonal or some shit because first she wants to hunt and then she doesn’t. *rolls eyes* Was that supposed to be “Dean-like” or some shit?
Dr. Brown is no Fred, let’s put it that way, but he has a deal for Liddy Walsh - who’s…father? I think, is ill and dying or some shit, ah, cancer, it’s not important - he’ll give her 10 years and then come asking for something. He goes all yellow-eyed and Skinner comes busting in, shotgun blazing. He shoves Skinner against the wall and he gets his own “Son of a Bitch” in. Non-mom throws herself in the fray and Fred finds her endearing - he wonders where she’s been hiding. Fred likes Mary - she’s got spunk. Dean shows up but Fred escapes.
Dean wants to know what Fred said to non-Mom while Skinner finishes up loose ends with Liddy. Skinner is much more of a compliment-er than John, that’s for sure. Too bad grandpa isn’t around now. (OR IS HE?!?!?!?!)
Dean tells Skinner that they need to talk alone and tells him that Mary will die - not now, but later if they don’t kill Fred. He spills the beans that - massively crazy - but hey, I’m your grandkid and I’m from the future. Doc Brown sent me back in a DeLorean so I could save my parents but my dad’s Crispin Glover, and he’s a world-class geek, so I have to set up this whole prom-thing with Biff…wait, wrong storyline. I’m Dean Winchester, John & Mary are my parents, I’m your grandson - love me! And by the by, Dude - we gotta kill Fred, STAT.
Skinner’s all dude…
Mary runs to John and wants him to take her away. John asks no questions - just gets her in the car. Skinner totally believes Dean…..and asks to see the Colt….ohhhhh that may not be - OH OH - Dean says he doesn’t let anyone touch it. HEH. OH FUCK. DAMN STRAIGHT! DUDE REMEMBER THE ALAMO! REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED WHEN YOU THOUGHT DADDY WAS YOUR DADDY - YOU WOUND UP WITH BLOOD-SPITTING-INNER-INJURIES AND BEING HIT BY A SEMI. OH FUCK! UT OH. Fred possessed SKINNER! OH NO! FUCK! HOLY HELL THIS EPISODE IS SO FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!1!
Sidebar: EDWARD NORTON & COLIN FARRELL!!!!!!!! TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!! IN A MOVIE!!! JESUS H. CHRIST!!
Dean! Don’t tell him you kill his kids at a later date! We don’t want you spewing blood from your mouth again! Or…rather, since I enjoy injured men, PLEASE DO - but! Sam’s busy being a smoke-sucker and he can’t fuck you back to health - so please spit the blood when you return to the future! K! Dean’s glued to the chair as Fred/Skinner grills him about being future boy. He’s SO AWESOME. He knows only someone in high places can go back in time and he came all this way to see him because he killed his Mommy. DUDES - MITCH YOU ROCK! Everyone that plays Fred just NAILS it. Evil must be easy to play - or maybe it’s because they’re having so much FUN. Evil does get to have a lot of fun. STAY AWAY SAMMY - THE EVIL ISN’T AS MUCH FUN AS FUCKING YOUR BROTHER, K? HAHA - Dean’s all - I came her to kill you and the way Skinner does this is just masterful. He’s like, “Hey!” as if it’s a fun afterthought - are you one of my psychic kids? ‘Cause that would rule! So HE SNIFFS HIM IN A COMPLETELY INAPPROPRIATELY SEXUAL MANNER THAT MADE ME HITCH A BREATH OR TWO. FUCK. He’s all nooope, not you future boy! But a brother! Means it all worked out - it’s why he’s there - he doesn’t want the souls - he wants the children. I’ve come for…the children. He’s choosing parents - people like Mary because they’re strong and pure and they’re ideal breeders. Damn. Skinner’s got a nice ass. *coughs* He doesn’t breed with any of the parents, but he’d like to with Mary. Mary’s his favorite so far. Dear God - I feel like I’ve stumbled into 10 Things I Hate About You (God rest you Heath - seriously). “What’s with this chick, she got beer flavored nipples?” Seriously - Samantha - I get the appeal. This chick? NO. He needs permission - needs permission to enter the houses - there’s red tape even in hell and in 10 years it’ll all be worth it. Meanwhile, Deanna, who is apparently better with cutting bananas than sneaking up on demons is advancing to…I dunno what the hell she was planning on doing, she runs like a pussy in a minute.
So Fred bleeds in their mouth - makes you big & strong…yeah, I dunno, whatever Fred. His endgame is not to lead a demon army, though. It’s bigger than that - but he’s not gonna tell Dean what it is - or the angels on his shoulder. So what would be bigger than taking over Earth? Heaven too? Dethrone God? Something along those lines? And…if Azazel is only a falling angel and Castiel said that Lucifer is real - is Azazel working for the devil then? So many answers and yet SO many questions.
Dean’s all - dude - I so toast your ass. SON OF A BITCH FROM DEAN!
Fred sticks Skinner and then goes after grandma too, who is not a very effective hunter. Skinner kills her and Dean is too late again to shoot him.
John’s proposing and Mary’s kinda freaking out because “There’s things you don’t know about me, John.” Well no SHIT. Pansy ass, yet HotAssDaddy says he’ll always love her for who she is. Almost kiss, kiss - But OH it’s Skinner. OH HOLY FUCK - HE JUST KILLED JOHN!!!!!!!!!!!! They’re all dead and she’s little orphan Mary now - LMAO - And OH OH THIS IS WHY - OH MY GOD - THIS IS WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GOD DAMN. HEH Non-mom gets her own son of a bitch in and that must be genetic too. Skinner says he’ll let John live, but not her parents - she’ll get her normal life, no more hunting - no more fear - he’ll make sure of it; BUT he needs permission to come back in 10 years - and as long as he’s not interrupted when he shows up, nobody gets hurt. He promises. Or she can spend the rest of her life desperate and alone. “It’s a good deal. So what do you say?”
FUCKING HELL SHE SAYS ………….WHAT DOES SHE SAY!?!??!??! FUCK!
Well obviously - she kisses Skinner and before Dean can kill him yet again, he smokes his way out of Skinner. And John comes back to life.
And Misha is back for Dean.
And then they’re gone.
FUCK.
Well that explains why she said she was sorry to Sam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………….how’s she gonna explain to John why Daddy’s dead?
How is Skinner hot?! SERIOUSLY?! I mean, he was OLD when he was Skinner really and now he’s even OLDER and he’s still fucking HOT. The man’s dead sexy! Maybe it’s the contacts - but he’s still hot when he’s just Grandpa Winchester. Maybe it’s the genes - everyone related to the boys is naturally and totally hot.
Dean wakes up in real time and Misha is there of course. Dean says he couldn’t stop any of it and she still made the deal and she still died. His Most Holy Sexiness tells him he couldn’t have stopped it. “Destiny can’t be changed, Dean. All roads lead to the same destination.” Dean asks why they sent him back then - it was for the truth and now Dean knows everything that they do.
Dean’s all, the fuck?
His Most Holiest of Hosts looks to Sam’s bed, which is empty of course, ‘cause he’s out sucking demon ass…er…that didn’t come out right. The angels, re: the good guys, know what Fred did to Sam, but they don’t know the WHY. They need to know the why - the endgame.
“Where’s Sam?” Indeed, I say. Misha says, “425 Waterman,” instead. Sam’s on a dangerous road - THAT’S WHO HE’S SUPPOSED TO STOP - or they will. GOD. The two of them here - both close-ups on their faces and MMMMMMMM yeah. MISHA’S GOT STUBBLE! HEE!
JESUS FUCK
OH MY GOD. NOOOOOOOOOOO TO BE CONTINUED?!?!?!??!?!?!?
WHAAAAAAAAAT NO!O@#JI@Oujieowajfds ajfkld ajfioewa rea~
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Next week: Something evil inside…Innocent man or Monster. Uhm…Dean gets eaten? I’m sensing a theme running in this next episode.
Ok - NOW - the big question - IF Dean had never gone back…WOULD Mary have been “found” by Fred? Did his going back somehow get her out in the open? Because again, time loops and shit - it’s fluid and ever moving. The past is moving just as the present and the future are - all intertwined. So…if Dean had never gone back…would it have influenced the past? Present? Future? I’m confusing even myself there, but…assuming that Mary had not gone to Liddy’s house that night…Fred wouldn’t have seen her, he wouldn’t have become attached…so wouldn’t it follow then that she wouldn’t have been chosen by him that night? John wouldn’t have died? Skinner & Deanna would still be alive? Jesus, I’m giving myself a headache. Mulder? Scully? Can you take over? I think I may have stepped into a black hole or a time tunnel or some shit because now I’m just thinking on too many planes. If Dean was the catalyst for everything and Castiel said that destiny can’t be changed…then…did it serve a purpose for him to go back? Did his going back actually change anything? How did it happen before he went back? Or it’s all a continuous loop - Dean never DIDN’T go back - he always goes back. Or again, if time is fluid, then his going back negates destiny doesn’t it? If it’s just a continuous loop and he’s been pre-ordained somehow to go back and have this happen - to be the driving force, then isn’t that similar to the age-old argument about free will? That if God knows all things, all possibilities and your whole life is planned out for you, then how does free will play a role if everything is predetermined? Ow.
Know what else? I just realized that Jared was in, like, ONE scene this whole episode - it must have been like a week off for him!
P.S. Kripke - please keep up the total AWESOME that has been this season thus far - and don’t fuck it up somewhere in the middle so I hate you endlessly forever and forever.