(no subject)
well basically when one thing gets better something always defies it.
i'm not going to israel anymore. and i'm really upset about this because i really really thought i was going. it was something to look forward to and now i can't go.
the only people who have called me in the last few days and really basically in the last week. is my mom and zac a couple times. oh winnie called me. thats it really. need i say more??
shaw can be a lonly place sometimes even when your surrounded by people. \I wish my room mate was what i wanted it to be. i knew i should not have excpectations and all though this situation is better then last year, its not what i want. other people get room mates who they are good firendw ith who goes to meals with them and hangs out with them and i've got myself and I. i hate everything sometimes.
i guess i'm kind of in a relationship. i know werid. but what i want is a guy who calls me all the time and wants to take me places..... maybe things can be that way. we'll see. i dont know the first thinga bout being in a relationship though....... its possible i've been living in a box my whole life. i feel like it sometimes when i feel so lost.
i finally have some direction in my life but only for the next like 2 1/2 years. after that is a mystery.
thats it.....for the rollarcoaster life of nicole.