how much more can i take?
life is fucking weird. over the past week so many different things have happened. i'll condense all of these events into a list.
1. last friday, chris and i decided we needed to get healthier, mentally. but just drink sometimes. needless to say, we spent all weekend drinking.
2. saturday, amanda had her 19th birthday party at her new house. that was pretty fun. i got to see megan bolin and try jello shots for the first time.
3. i don't think anything really happened sunday. except chris and i went to see tim and mike's new house.
4. monday was memorial day, 2008. the night seemed to be going great. we were shitfaced at george's and having a good time..until i made some smartass remark to chris as we were leaving, resulting in basically the biggest drunken altercation either of us has ever experienced. i was screaming and crying at his house, which upset his mother, and my mom had to come get me.
5. tuesday and wednesday were pretty much decent days, but with some occasional pissy moments. still haven't talked to chris's mom, though i did send her a text apologizing. she said it was okay, but i still feel like shit. my mom got a new job though, which will hopefully be great for her.
6. yesterday, a few sort of monumental things happened.
A. i got a job at this place called vector, that markets and sells cutco knives--very nice knives. i will be making $13 an hour with bonuses, which is such an improvement from fucking $5.85 at the theater! i found out that glaze also got a job there recently. it really kicks ass to have a friend working with you when you didn't expect it.
B. also yesterday, chris and i called a truce over everything. we discussed what's been on his mind lately, since he's had more time to himself since monday. i speculated that we are both exhibiting symptoms of depression. chris needs a punching bag. i need a self-esteem boost (i think new clothes would help). and we both need to get out of this fucking town.
C. went to glaze's graduation. woo! there was a girl there, the valedictorian, whose dad didn't get to be there to see her walk because he's in iraq. but in a surprise move, she got to see him on webcam in front of everyone. it was really sad for me because my dad didn't get to go to mine. i teared up a little.
D. drank at george's again. i worked on pacing myself this time. and luckily there wasn't any KD or that would have sucked.
7. today, i attened cunningham's kindergarten graduation. it was so nice to get to see those kids! i haven't seen them in over a month since i started homeschooling tessa and my cousins. they all seemed really happy to see me, too.
things have been not really awkward, but definitely different, since that memorial day. chris and i haven't been together like we normally are. i've been having to wait till he feels like seeing me. i've come to understand that, yes, people do need time apart. but either way, it kind of hurts for everything to have shifted so quickly. i'm just hoping for the best! after all, we have a whole three months before school starts again. today will be fun, i think.
in other news: hahaaaaaaaa, i really hate sluts. i just don't see what is so attractive about sitting there speaking loudly and openly about devaluing one's own self worth.
1. last friday, chris and i decided we needed to get healthier, mentally. but just drink sometimes. needless to say, we spent all weekend drinking.
2. saturday, amanda had her 19th birthday party at her new house. that was pretty fun. i got to see megan bolin and try jello shots for the first time.
3. i don't think anything really happened sunday. except chris and i went to see tim and mike's new house.
4. monday was memorial day, 2008. the night seemed to be going great. we were shitfaced at george's and having a good time..until i made some smartass remark to chris as we were leaving, resulting in basically the biggest drunken altercation either of us has ever experienced. i was screaming and crying at his house, which upset his mother, and my mom had to come get me.
5. tuesday and wednesday were pretty much decent days, but with some occasional pissy moments. still haven't talked to chris's mom, though i did send her a text apologizing. she said it was okay, but i still feel like shit. my mom got a new job though, which will hopefully be great for her.
6. yesterday, a few sort of monumental things happened.
A. i got a job at this place called vector, that markets and sells cutco knives--very nice knives. i will be making $13 an hour with bonuses, which is such an improvement from fucking $5.85 at the theater! i found out that glaze also got a job there recently. it really kicks ass to have a friend working with you when you didn't expect it.
B. also yesterday, chris and i called a truce over everything. we discussed what's been on his mind lately, since he's had more time to himself since monday. i speculated that we are both exhibiting symptoms of depression. chris needs a punching bag. i need a self-esteem boost (i think new clothes would help). and we both need to get out of this fucking town.
C. went to glaze's graduation. woo! there was a girl there, the valedictorian, whose dad didn't get to be there to see her walk because he's in iraq. but in a surprise move, she got to see him on webcam in front of everyone. it was really sad for me because my dad didn't get to go to mine. i teared up a little.
D. drank at george's again. i worked on pacing myself this time. and luckily there wasn't any KD or that would have sucked.
7. today, i attened cunningham's kindergarten graduation. it was so nice to get to see those kids! i haven't seen them in over a month since i started homeschooling tessa and my cousins. they all seemed really happy to see me, too.
things have been not really awkward, but definitely different, since that memorial day. chris and i haven't been together like we normally are. i've been having to wait till he feels like seeing me. i've come to understand that, yes, people do need time apart. but either way, it kind of hurts for everything to have shifted so quickly. i'm just hoping for the best! after all, we have a whole three months before school starts again. today will be fun, i think.
in other news: hahaaaaaaaa, i really hate sluts. i just don't see what is so attractive about sitting there speaking loudly and openly about devaluing one's own self worth.