Catharsis
I had some bad experiences over the holidays, culminating in getting sick, and I am really struggling. I like my life. I like where I live, I like my job, I like my marriage. The only complaint I would have is not having enough money to spend on all the traveling I'd like to do, but I still get out there when I can and have mini adventures. I don't think I'm boring. I don't think I'm someone to just put up with. But since these bad experiences, I feel like everyone is seeing me that way. And my perception being this way is sucking the enjoyment out of almost everything. It is making me feel ambivalent about having people over, about making plans, for fear of disappointment or lack of interest. I'm trying to nip it in the bud. And granted, I've only been able to sleep for two nights now after finally starting to get over the stress I've been under. This is the first day I've left the house for fun since I went to Atlanta two weeks ago. I know I should give myself time to heal and work through it. But damn it, why not share it with LJ land at the same time.
ETA: I was just telling my woes to a friend, who reminded me that I don't have to be interesting or hip or perfect all of the time. I reject that! I feel like I need to win! Umm... yeah, I'm a little frenetic today.
ETA: I was just telling my woes to a friend, who reminded me that I don't have to be interesting or hip or perfect all of the time. I reject that! I feel like I need to win! Umm... yeah, I'm a little frenetic today.