Sgwiglonia Classic #2 - Embarassing Story
Here’s another classic entry. Just to clarify: Rabbi Brody, a former teacher of mine, once arrived to class and explained that his eye was irritated because he had shot himself in the eye with shampoo in the shower. I thought that was hilarious.
“Embarassing Story” - Originally Posted May 21st, 2004
So I was reading a teen magazine that my dad inexplicably got in the mail for some reason, and I came across this letter in one of those "embarrassing stories" articles. I swear, this is actually what the letter said:
"I was throwing a pool party, and I had invited this guy who I had a major crush on. I was shocked to see that he actually decided to come, but when I finally gathered the courage to talk to him I was so absorbed with his golden hair and perfect teeth that I tripped on a step as I was walking over to him. My shirt got caught on the arm of a chair and my top was totally ripped off. I was so embarrassed! My crush even started pointing at me and laughing. Then all my clothes came off for some reason and I farted and my little brother pushed my dresser out the second story window and it bounced into the pool and all my leopard print thongs and Pokémon bras spilled out and my crush started making out with my BFF and the paparazzi arrived for footage that was broadcasted all over the world, even Kazakhstan, and then Islamic fundamentalists came over in black helicopters and pointed at me while chanting 'It is the Satan!' and my crush was chanting too between kissing my BFF and then a meteor fell from the sky and plowed my house four miles into the earth. And then I had my period."
Actually, I made up most of that letter. The real letter was by some girl named R. Brody who had shot herself in the eye with shampoo or something.
“Embarassing Story” - Originally Posted May 21st, 2004
So I was reading a teen magazine that my dad inexplicably got in the mail for some reason, and I came across this letter in one of those "embarrassing stories" articles. I swear, this is actually what the letter said:
"I was throwing a pool party, and I had invited this guy who I had a major crush on. I was shocked to see that he actually decided to come, but when I finally gathered the courage to talk to him I was so absorbed with his golden hair and perfect teeth that I tripped on a step as I was walking over to him. My shirt got caught on the arm of a chair and my top was totally ripped off. I was so embarrassed! My crush even started pointing at me and laughing. Then all my clothes came off for some reason and I farted and my little brother pushed my dresser out the second story window and it bounced into the pool and all my leopard print thongs and Pokémon bras spilled out and my crush started making out with my BFF and the paparazzi arrived for footage that was broadcasted all over the world, even Kazakhstan, and then Islamic fundamentalists came over in black helicopters and pointed at me while chanting 'It is the Satan!' and my crush was chanting too between kissing my BFF and then a meteor fell from the sky and plowed my house four miles into the earth. And then I had my period."
Actually, I made up most of that letter. The real letter was by some girl named R. Brody who had shot herself in the eye with shampoo or something.