Well well well
... that was interesting.
I have a boyfriend. I have a boy friend. I mean, I've got a boyfriend! I just got down and dirty with a guy on the expedition. Calvin. Calvin Kavanagh. Guy. Male. Not girl.
How the hell am I ever going to explain this to Sarah?
I mean, okay, sure, I've thought the occasional guy was cute and all but hey, I'm a decent, liberal fellow. Of course I am secure enough in myself to notice someone worth looking at, especially if that someone has a good brain to back up the pretty surface. But ... a guy?
How could I get to be this old and not figure out I ... like guys?
And then to end up in the infirmary after at least half the expedition saw him carrying me like that through the hallways like some sort of epic adventure hero. If I hadn't liked him before, that would have done it. He didn't give a shit about what anyone thought -- he thought I was dying and he took care of it.
But ... but he.
Oh man. Okay. Take it easy. He's hot, he likes you, you like him. You had great sex together. You told him you're okay with being together, and really, why not? It's not a big deal. He's just ... not a girl. It'll be okay.
I don't even have words for this. It was all hot and it was sexy and it was touching and it was ... it was, wow. Great. Absolutely great. And there will be more.
But ... a guy?
At least I'm not in the American military. Thank God for small mercies.
I have a boyfriend. I have a boy friend. I mean, I've got a boyfriend! I just got down and dirty with a guy on the expedition. Calvin. Calvin Kavanagh. Guy. Male. Not girl.
How the hell am I ever going to explain this to Sarah?
I mean, okay, sure, I've thought the occasional guy was cute and all but hey, I'm a decent, liberal fellow. Of course I am secure enough in myself to notice someone worth looking at, especially if that someone has a good brain to back up the pretty surface. But ... a guy?
How could I get to be this old and not figure out I ... like guys?
And then to end up in the infirmary after at least half the expedition saw him carrying me like that through the hallways like some sort of epic adventure hero. If I hadn't liked him before, that would have done it. He didn't give a shit about what anyone thought -- he thought I was dying and he took care of it.
But ... but he.
Oh man. Okay. Take it easy. He's hot, he likes you, you like him. You had great sex together. You told him you're okay with being together, and really, why not? It's not a big deal. He's just ... not a girl. It'll be okay.
I don't even have words for this. It was all hot and it was sexy and it was touching and it was ... it was, wow. Great. Absolutely great. And there will be more.
But ... a guy?
At least I'm not in the American military. Thank God for small mercies.