(no subject)
i feel like life just bitch slapped me across the face. i was in as good a mood as always then had a long talk with my parents about what i need to do with my life in the next few months to try and achieve the things i want to do and especially about the long-term consequences of my dui and i got really depressed. i hate having so much pressure put on me a having to deal with so much stuff, its not how i am to try and tackle so many things at once. i know once i start working again and saving money i can begin to clear my head about all of this but i dont see relief for quite some time. i know if i was with ada right now she would make me feel better but shes in fucking denmark for a year and i dont think ill be able to go see her for months, i want to go study in italy to be a little closer but i doubt my family could afford to help me do that. writing all of this out made me feel a little better but i dont like thinking about all of this so much and i wish i could make that stop but its impossible.