Fic: Kite Flying For Beginners (Beckett/McKay, NC-17)
Title: Kite Flying For Beginners
Author: flubber2kool
Recipient: wiccanslyr
Pairing: Carson/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I lay no claim to any of the characters or settings from SGA. All other characters are my own.
Author's Notes: Spoilers for various eps from Various seasons. This is a Carson/Rodney story and yep, I even got in a little Woolsey in there too. :D Thanks to my beta padfootthegrim She has been a great help and has made my story far better than it was.
Summary: As Carson thinks back on how he and Rodney got together, he realises that their relationship is a lot like flying a kite.
Two men stood beside the ocean. One was flying a kite and the other was standing watching him. The sun was beginning to set, the men appearing as dark figures against the golden sky.
The man flying the kite was one Meredith Rodney McKay. He had two PHD's and was a self-confessed genius. 'The smartest man in two galaxies.' He was also CSO of the Atlantis expedition.
The other was Carson Beckett. A doctor who was as well known for his ATA gene and his work on ATA gene therapy as he was for his bedside manner. He was part of the small British contingent and he wore his Scottish flag patch with pride. (It hurt him to remember that his compatriot Dr. Peter Grodin, was no longer with them.) He was the CMO of the Atlantis expedition.
"That's it luv. Pull a little harder." Carson called out in encouragement.
As he did so, he fingered the ring that he wore on the third finger of his right hand. This was a commitment ring. Carson and Rodney were more that friends and colleagues. They were lovers. Carson would be the first one to tell you that loving Rodney wasn't the easiest thing to do. There were days when he was amazed that they had managed to get together in the first place. His thoughts drifted back to how he and Rodney had got together.
It all began in the Antarctic base. Carson wasn't sure why it happened. After all, it wasn't like Rodney McKay was the most handsome man in the world. Nor was he the wittiest, or the most charming. Even some of his table manners left more than a little to be desired. And yet, there was something that Carson found irresistible about the man and that was the problem. Back then, all that Rodney saw in Carson was the fact that he was the strongest ATA gene carrier on the base.
Carson hated this. It wasn't as if he liked working with chair anyway. He was more at home in a medical lab surrounded by medical equipment and things that he understood. The chair scared him. He knew he could make it work and that it had something to do with the ATA gene but he still didn't know how he did it. That coupled with the distraction of the man who was in charge just didn't really help at all.
As Carson stood and thought about it, he realized that their relationship had been a bit like flying kites. When he was a child, he had loved kite flying. He hadn't found it at all easy but when he finally managed to master it, it was the most amazing feeling ever. He loved the way that the kite would dance in the wind. But he came to learn that kite flying could be unpredictable. Strong winds could come and go anytime. Rodney was as unpredictable as the wind.
When Carson met Rodney he came over as being a snarky self-assured genius and 'self-assured' genius and scientist who didn't seek out the company of others. He wanted things done his way. When others didn't meet his exacting standards, he didn't hesitate to tell them so.
When he went to Atlantis, this began to change. He became part of a team and began to strike up a strong friendship with John Sheppard, military leader of the expedition after Col. Sumner was killed. In Carson's eyes they became like brothers and it was as if Rodney began to look up to John. He also became friends with Carson.
Of course it wasn't always smooth sailing; Rodney being Rodney was sometimes a victim of his own genius. He didn't suffer fools gladly and he didn't like to be told that he was wrong. The man who seemed to get the brunt of this was Dr. Radek Zelenka, his number two in the science department. This was evident in the incident of Doranda. After Rodney had managed to blow up five sixths of a solar system he had a lot of bridges to rebuild.
Carson watched all this from the sidelines. He wanted to go up to him, to comfort him, tell him it would be alright. He wanted to tell him how he felt. But he just couldn't bring him himself to do it. He reasoned that it was because he didn't want to ruin his friendship; but he knew it was because he was scared. After all, Rodney had given no indication that he was gay. And, if he was honest, he would rather have him as a friend than risk it all on something that was a dream.
Of course there were times when he nearly gave in. When he nearly told him how he felt. These were the times when he had nearly lost him. Such as the time where Rodney and his team came in to contact with the nanovirus, or the time when he had nearly died when trying to ascend. The time that really stuck in his head was when Rodney had been infected by the parasite. He along with everyone else had had to watch his friend seem to die by degrees with there being nothing they could do. During that time Rodney made videos to chart the progress of the problem. It was only when everything had been resolved and Rodney had been saved that Carson found something that gave him hope.
He was looking at the videos when he stopped. "Carson, there's something I wanted to say to you ... while I can still remember ..."
Carson heard his voice off screen. "Go ahead."
Rodney continued, "I... I love you. I... have loved... you for some time."
Rodney then carried on.
That made Carson think; maybe he did have a chance after all. He decided that he would find a way to let him know how he felt. And that chance came sooner than he thought.
Colonel Sheppard and his team had been on a mission to PX1-572. Carson wasn't quite sure what they were doing there. He thought it had something to do with an ancient artifact that was supposed to be there. All he knew for certain was that a few hours in to the mission they had received a message from the Colonel.
"This is Colonel Sheppard to Atlantis. We have come across a village. There is something wrong with their village leader. Their healer has tried everything but there has been no improvement. I know that it may be a long shot... I was wondering if we could get Dr. Beckett to come through and have a look at him."
Richard Woolsey, head of the Atlantis expedition, stood and listened. He considered for a moment. It wouldn't hurt for him to send Dr. Beckett. He was sure that Colonel Sheppard would be able to look after him and keep him safe. After what the Colonel had told him, he had a feeling that he would've told them about the Doctor and he didn't want to disappoint them.
"Alright Colonel. I'll send him through."
"Message understood. Sheppard out." With that the wormhole disconnected.
After a talk with Woolsey Carson found himself in the gate room all geared up and ready to go through. He was still apprehensive as, no matter how many times he did it, he still was ill at ease about going through a wormhole. He'd even gotten Radek to sit down and explain the mechanics of it all. He'd tried asking Rodney but he got lost after the first few sentences. Afterwards he felt even worse. But needs must.
On the other side he was met by Colonel Sheppard. "Hey there doc. Good to see you."
Carson rolled his eyes. "Aye, it's good to see you to. Now where's the patient?"
John gestured over his shoulder with a nod, "he's down in the village."
With that, John led Carson in to the village. On the way down Carson could see a figure standing waiting for them. As they drew nearer the person rushed up to them. He nodded to the Colonel and turned towards Carson.
"Are you healer Beckett?" The man said, "I am healer Jolen. I am sorry to have to bring you here. Our leader has been ill for fourteen lunar cycles. Nothing I have done has made a difference... Colonel Sheppard said that you might be able to help."
Carson nodded. "Aye Lad. I will take a look for you. I can't promise anything but I will do my best."
Jolen led Carson towards the building that served as an infirmary. As he did so, Carson noticed Rodney. He was about to call out to him when he looked up. As Rodney looked at Carson he smiled, then he looked down at his feet. Was he blushing?
"That's wishful thinking lad." he thought to himself.
Jolen took Carson in to the building and led him in to a side room.
"This is leader Orlain." Jolen said, as he led Carson o the side of the bed. Laying his medical bag down by the side of the bed, Carson took a look at the man. He looked frail and his skin was covered in a sheen of sweat; his head felt warm to the touch. It wasn't hard to work out that he had a fever.
As Carson pulled back he sheet that covered him, he noticed that Orlain had a dressing on his stomach. Reaching in to his bag, Carson took out a pair of rubber gloves. Pulling them on, he pulled back the dressing and was met by the smell of infection. The wound was oozing.
"Jolen, I need to drain the infection. I have medication that I can give him to numb the area before I clean it. Do you have anything that you can give him to bring down his temperature?" Carson asked as he sorted and prepped his equipment.
Jolen thought for a moment. "Yes I do. We use Comsalan. It's a natural herb that grows on the planet. It has healing properties, one of which is an ability to help this matter. But I tried it before and it didn't work."
"Aye lad. That's probably because of the infection in the wound." Carson looked at Jolen, "How long has the wound been this bad?"
"Only for the last four lunar cycles. It's possible that there is something in there, but I have been unable to bring it to the surface." Jolen looked at Carson with an apprehensive look on his face.
"It's alright lad." Carson said with a smile. "I'm certain that you've done everything that you can."
Jolen smiled nervously at this and went off to prepare the Comsalan. By the time he came back Carson had managed to find and extract the foreign object from the wound and had cleaned it. He also had it all dressed.
"He needs to have the dressing replaced in the morning. Do you have the Comsalan ready?" Carson asked as he cleared everything up.
"It's here. He needs to drink it and ideally he should have it every four hours." Jolen sighed. "I wanted to go home. It's been three days since I have taken an evening meal with my wife. I like to stay with Orlain at night."
Carson looked at him. "Do you not have anyone else could stay with Orlain?"
"Yes I do but I promised him that I would take good care of him." Jolen said looking towards the bed.
Carson looked at him. "It's alright. I'll stay with him."
Jolen looked at him. "Are you sure?"
Carson smiled. "Go on get out of here before I change my mind."
Carson watched Jolen go. He then settled in to watch his patient. Carson was unaware of how much time had passed when he heard a noise. Looking up in the lamplight he saw a figure coming towards him.
"Hey." It was Rodney. "We noticed that you hadn't joined us for food tonight so I've brought you something."
Carson noticed that he was carrying a tray. Rodney put it down and pulled up a chair. "I also thought that you could do with the company."
Carson looked at Rodney; the light shone in his eyes and made them seem a lovely shade of blue. Carson thanked him and began to eat. They spent the next few hours talking or sitting in silence as Carson took care of Orlain.
The next night Jolen went on his way and Carson sat alone watching his patient. Again Rodney brought Carson his meal. On the third night the same thing happened. Only this time, Rodney brought some food for himself and joined Carson for his evening meal. Carson and he sat and talked. It was a very pleasant way to spend an evening.
The next day Orlain's fever broke. He regained consciousness but was still very groggy. In the evening Orlain was sleeping when Jolen came to speak to Carson.
"Thank you for your time Carson. I'll take over tonight." He said with a smile.
Carson looked at him. "Are you sure?"
"Of course. It's time that you spent some time with your friends. In fact Dr. McKay has expressed a desire to spend some time in your company this evening."
Carson schooled his features, but inside he couldn't help feeling a sense of confusion and hope. Carson had noticed how attentive Rodney had been the last few days, and now he wanted to spend time in his company. Maybe there was a chance that Rodney really did mean what he'd said while under the influence of the parasite, but there was still no way to be sure.
"Damn." Carson thought to himself, "Why can't this be easy?"
"Thank you lad," Carson said with a smile, "It'll be nice to spend an evening with my friends."
Jolen smiled. Go on before I change my mind."
"Thank you lad." Carson said with a smile, "It'll be nice to spend an evening with my friends."
"Go on before I change my mind," Jolen said with a mischievous smile.
Carson couldn't help smiling back as he left the building. As he was head towards the center of the village a familiar figure headed towards him.
"Ah, there you are," Rodney greeted as he got close. "So you're going to be joining us tonight?" Before Carson could do more than nod, Rodney continued, "good. We're taking our meal at the village campfire tonight." Suddenly, Rodney's shy look returned. "I hope you don't mind me asking John to save us a seat together."
Carson found this look very endearing. "No, of course not Rodney, I'll be glad to join you."
Rodney looked up at him and beamed. His smiled was large; it was the kind of smile he had on his face when he discovered a piece of Ancient tech, or solved a long standing problem in the city. Since when did he merit a look like that? It was a confusing if pleasurable experience.
As they reached the campfire they saw John and the team and headed towards them.
"Hey Doc. How are things?" John asked.
"We have the infection under control and have managed to bring down his fever. He regained consciousness this morning. When I left him he was sleeping peacefully. Jolen is looking after him tonight."
"Nice one Doc. I knew you could do it."
"Thank you John. Glad to be able to help."
The rest of the evening was spent eating the food that the villagers had made and enjoying their stories. The team also told him about what they had been doing on the mission before he arrived. Teyla told him all about the village and its people. Ronon talked about how he had joined some of the men on and hunt and how much he had enjoyed it. Rodney talked about a building that they had found that he believed had been an Ancient outpost. He hoped that Woolsey would let him bring a team back to investigate it properly. He then complained that John had been flirting with all the pretty women in the village. John grinned, shook his head and rolled his eyes.
At the end of the evening, as the fire began to die down, people started to drift away. Carson was about to get up to leave when he felt a hand on his own. It was Rodney. Carson looked at him and before he could say anything, Rodney closed the distance between them and kissed him. At first it was hesitant and gentle, but as Carson responded, the kiss deepened and became more passionate.
Pulling Carson to his feet Rodney wrapped his arms around him. Running his tongue over Carson's lips he requested entrance. Carson opened enough to let him in. Rodney ran his tongue around the inside of his mouth. Eventually the lack of air forced them apart.
"Rodney?" Carson said in surprise.
Rodney looked at him. "I don't remember everything I said when I had a parasite in my head, but I do remember telling you the way that I feel about you." Rodney stopped and swallowed hard. "I meant every word. I'm just sorry that it took something like that to make you tell you."
Carson raised his hand to Rodney's face and stroked it over his jaw. "Aye luv. I'm sorry too. I thought I'd lost you before I'd found you. That was the hardest operation that I've ever had to perform. Why didn't tell me how you felt before?"
Rodney bowed his head. "I was going to but... well then we became such good friends that I was too scared. I didn't even know if you were gay."
Carson sighed. "I wish you had told me Rodney. I've had feelings for you since I met you at the Antarctic base." This time it was Rodney's turn to look surprised. "But I do know how you felt. I was scared to tell you too. How can two such clever men be so stupid?"
Rodney laid his forehead against Carson's. "I've heard that love does that to you."
Carson laughed. "We know now. Would you like to spend the night together?"
"What... with you Carson?"
Carson shook his head and smiled. "Yes Rodney, with me."
Rodney blushed, not that Carson could see it, and moved his head to Carson's shoulder. "That would be nice."
With that Carson took Rodney's hand in his and led him to his room. Carson lit the lamp and the room was filled by its soft glow. Rodney's eyes were gleaming as Carson began to undress Rodney. Pulling his pants and briefs down Carson got Rodney to sit down so he could remove them. When Rodney was naked Carson stood him up and looked at him. Carson had always admired the man; his broad shoulders and his strong hands and arms. More than once he had dreamt about seeing Rodney naked before him. Now that he was looking at him for real it was better than any dream.
Carson walked round him, like someone appreciating a work of art. "Beautiful. Truly beautiful. Far better than seeing you in my dreams. Why have you hidden yourself so long my luv?"
Carson ran his finger over Rodney's skin. Each touch sent a jolt of electricity from his skin to his groin coming to rest in his cock. It was hard and erect.
Carson looked down at Rodney's cock. He took Rodney in hand and stroked him slowly. With his other hand, he weighed Rodney's balls. "Magnificent Rodney," Carson's voice sounded almost reverential.
Rodney leaned it to Carson's touch. The sound of his words hit Rodney deep in the soul. He had never thought that he would find someone who seemed to love him like that.
"Carson I... I..." the words were lost in his throat as he started to cry.
Carson looked at Rodney. Letting go of his cock and balls, he took Rodney in his arms and pulled him towards him. Rodney whimpered as the cloth of Carson's jacket rubbed against his nipples.
"What is it luv?"
Rodney pulled back a little before continuing. "When I was younger my mother used to taunt me. She didn't think that being a genius was anything special. Sometimes she would be really mean and tell me that I would never amount to anything. That I would just grow old and fat and end up being alone. But now.... now I have you and.... you love me. I proved her wrong didn't I."
Carson held on to him tightly and he put his hand on his back. "Yes you did and I will always be here for you. Now what do you want Rodney? Tell me." Carson asked as he moved his hand up and down.
Rodney stuttered. "I... I... I want you to... fuck me."
To Carson a fuck was something you did on a one night stand with someone you would most likely never see again. Close encounters in places you would wouldn't normally go with people you would and never could care about. Rodney deserved more than that. And Carson was going to give it to him. He cared about Rodney more than he had done about anyone before.
"No Rodney I'm going to make love to you. Now lie down on the bed and spread your legs out for me."
Carson watched as Rodney laid on the bed, his cock bouncing on his stomach. Reaching in to his bag he got out some lube and slicked his fingers. First he inserted one and then another; stretching Rodney to prepare him. Rodney relaxed into the sensation. Carson was taking his time to make this something meaningful. After what Rodney had said about his mother Carson needed to show him what he felt about him and this was it.
Taking out his fingers, Carson heard Rodney sigh. "It's alright lad. I'm just going to get a condom."
"No Carson. No condoms. Want to feel you. Want this... this to be..." Rodney stopped, his voice almost pleading.
"All right then my love." It wasn't as if it would really matter. Carson knew that Rodney was clean and he was.
Before he entered Rodney he leant down and licked from the just above Rodney's anus to the tip of his cock and back again. Carson looked up in time to see Rodney shiver as he looked at him, begging him to enter him. Without another word he rubbed a little lube on to his cock and entered Rodney. Placing Rodney's legs over his shoulders Carson gasped at Rodney's tightness as he eased himself in. Rodney in turn moaned as Carson entered him. Rodney's eyes were wide with lust and yet his look managed to convey a sense of trust. Carson was undone by this.
After pressing himself in totally Carson stopped to let Rodney adjust. Rodney's head tipped back and he moaned and Carson took that as his permission to carry on. He began to move slowly at first, savouring each moment. He also savoured the look on Rodney's face. It was one of complete abandon. It was a look that Carson had never seen before but hoped that he would see again.
Carson abandoned himself in the feelings that came with having himself sheathed within Rodney. He began to move faster and faster; the heat of Rodney sheathing Carson's cock was almost too much for him to bear. It took all his self control not to come there and then. But Carson was determined to make it last for Rodney. His resolve was nearly undone when he watched as Rodney grabbed hold of his cock and started to rub his hand up and down in time to each of Carson's thrusts.
"Carson, Carson, Carson." Rodney chanted his name as if it was a mantra. Each call of his name sounded breathless and needy at the same time. "CARSON," with on final shout Rodney cried out as his body convulsed and he came across his stomach.
As he did Rodney clenched his ass around Carson's cock. The look on Rodney's face, the feeling of his come slicking their bellies, and the vice like grip around his own dick finally pushed Carson over the edge. With a few more ragged thrusts, Carson let go, thrusting deeply into his lover as he groaned and came hard. He felt as if fire was coursing down his spine as he slowly collapsed onto Rodney. As his cock softened, Carson slipped out of Rodney. He fell on to the bed beside his lover and pulled him close. He listened to Rodney's breathing as his own started to settle.
Carson slipped out of the bed and padded to the bathroom, coming back with a cloth. As he went to clean Rodney up, he stopped to look at him. He looked sated and, for the first time in a long time, he looked at peace.
"Hey there... " Rodney looked at him and gave him a sloppy grin. "That was... mmmm, worth waiting for."
Carson smiled, cleaned him up and went to look at his ass. Rodney lifted his head and looked down at Carson. "What ya doing?" he asked groggily, through the post coital haze.
"Just making sure that everything is okay down there."
Rolling his eyes, Rodney mumbled, "Always the doctor. Now get up here. There are other parts of me that need taking care of."
Carson laughed and joined Rodney on the bed, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him into a cuddle.
"Thank you Carson. I have done that before... it's just that... well to be frank I think, looking back on it, I think they were all pity fucks. Nobody really cared about me and they... just indulged me by staying the night. But they were gone by the morning."
Carson held Rodney tight. "I won't be gone in the morning."
Rodney sighed happily, "I know Carson. This is the real thing."
With that the two of them drifted in to an easy sleep.
The next morning Carson woke up to find his arm draped across Rodney's body. There was something that felt so right about it and he lay still, watching Rodney until his lover finally began to stir. "Hey there, sleepy," Carson said softly.
Rodney rolled over and looked at Carson and gave him the warmest smile that he had ever seen. It made Carson's insides go gooey; he just couldn't help it. Rodney looked at him through half opened eyes. The way that the morning light caught them made them shine. They looked as blue as the ocean around Atlantis on a sunny day. Rodney moved over towards him and kissed him gently on the lips. As he pulled back, he smiled at Carson again.
"Hey there, Carson, it's good to see you." Rodney looked so happy. Carson was pleased that he had been the one to put that look on his face.
Eventually they both got up and ready to go out and face the day. As they dressed they kept looking at each other and smiling. Carson felt like he was flying. They couldn't help grinning as they walked out to meet the rest of the team. John and Ronon gave each other a knowing look as the two men walked towards them.
The rest of the day was spent with Carson checking on Orlain's progress with Rodney close by his side, with the rest of the team taking a good look round the village. Ronon found some more knives to add to his collection and Teyla found some cloth to take home to make in to clothes.
At the end of the day, Carson and Rodney joined the others. "Orlain's going to be okay. He was sitting up and talking. Jolen says that he feels that he should be able to administer his medicines from now on. We are able to leave as soon as we like."
John nodded. An hour or so later they found themselves at the gate. Jolen was with them.
He walked up to Carson and gave him a hug. "You have our eternal gratitude. Thank you for your help, Doctor."
"You're welcome." Carson smiled as he turned to watch Rodney dial the DHD.
With the familiar sound of the gate dialing and the wormhole establishing, the team headed back to Atlantis. It was good to get back, especially for Rodney and Carson. As time went by they found great solace in their relationship, but Carson wanted more. He really wanted to show Rodney just how much he meant to him. It was then he thought about having a commitment ceremony. As per usual in the Pegasus galaxy real life got in the way.
After the defeat of the Wraith, Carson managed to land the city in the water just off San Francisco. As he walked onto the balcony he saw Rodney standing with John, Ronon, Teyla and the expedition leader Richard Woolsey. Making his way to stand beside Rodney, he reached out for his hand. Rodney smiled and took Carson's hand as they looked out to the Golden Gate Bridge. It felt strange to be home. Carson felt as if his life had turned full circle. Here would be the perfect place for a commitment ceremony. He knew it wouldn't be binding in the eyes of the law, but that didn't matter. It would be binding for him. Carson knew that Rodney was the one for him, and nothing that they could say or do would change that.
A month later, Rodney, Carson and a small group of people stood on the same balcony. They'd decided to have the ceremony on Atlantis. They knew that their families would be mad but they could always do something later. Teyla had said that the Athosians had such a ceremony and that both Rodney and Carson would need someone to stand with them.
"It is our tradition."
Rodney turned to his friend John and Carson asked Ronon if he would do it. Both men accepted; glad to be able to be part of the ceremony. They had also asked if Richard Woolsey wished to be there too. As head of the expedition and the man who, in his own way, helped bring them together they wanted him to be there.
There was also an item that was to be used as a sign of their commitment. Carson and Rodney had decided to use rings. John had the ring meant for Carson and Ronon had the ring meant for Rodney.
It was a lovely ceremony; Teyla spoke about the commitment that Rodney and Carson were making and how this would be seen by those who watched over them. Each of the people present were asked why they should be joined in this way. Richard said that they deserved each other; Ronon said that it was about time and John said that they both deserved to be loved.
"I declare my love and commit my life to you Meredith Rodney McKay. There is no one but you in my life and there will be no one else but you from now until the end of time." With that Ronon handed Carson the ring. He slipped it onto Rodney's finger.
"I declare my love and commit my life to you Carson Beckett. There is no one but you in my life and there will be no one else but you from now until the end of time." John handed Rodney the ring. He slipped it on to Carson's finger.
"May those who have gone before look upon you and the commitment you have made. May you be forever blessed and your days together be many." Teyla replied, blessing them.
Everyone who was there clapped and cheered. Richard had arranged a special meal for them in the briefing room. At the end of the meal Rodney and Carson were about to leave when John stopped them.
"Hey guys. Got you a present. Hope you like it."
Rodney opened the gift John handed him. It was the makings of a kite and it resembled a F302.
"You know, I never flew a kite when I was a child. I was never given a chance to do that." Rodney said as he studied the kite.
Richard walked over to them as Carson watched Rodney look at the kite. "Well Doctor, you will have plenty of time to learn. I have arranged for you two take two weeks off so you can spend some time together." Carson watched as Rodney was about to protest, but Woolsey cut him off with a raised hand "I promise you that we'll not let anyone from outside take over the city in your absence. This is our home and I have no intention of losing it to anyone."
With that they walked off to get ready to leave.
That was how he found himself on the beach with Rodney flying the kite. Love was definitely like flying kites; it was unpredictable and uncertain; but when it really worked, it worked. Right now he was flying so high he was up there in the stars.
Author: flubber2kool
Recipient: wiccanslyr
Pairing: Carson/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I lay no claim to any of the characters or settings from SGA. All other characters are my own.
Author's Notes: Spoilers for various eps from Various seasons. This is a Carson/Rodney story and yep, I even got in a little Woolsey in there too. :D Thanks to my beta padfootthegrim She has been a great help and has made my story far better than it was.
Summary: As Carson thinks back on how he and Rodney got together, he realises that their relationship is a lot like flying a kite.
Two men stood beside the ocean. One was flying a kite and the other was standing watching him. The sun was beginning to set, the men appearing as dark figures against the golden sky.
The man flying the kite was one Meredith Rodney McKay. He had two PHD's and was a self-confessed genius. 'The smartest man in two galaxies.' He was also CSO of the Atlantis expedition.
The other was Carson Beckett. A doctor who was as well known for his ATA gene and his work on ATA gene therapy as he was for his bedside manner. He was part of the small British contingent and he wore his Scottish flag patch with pride. (It hurt him to remember that his compatriot Dr. Peter Grodin, was no longer with them.) He was the CMO of the Atlantis expedition.
"That's it luv. Pull a little harder." Carson called out in encouragement.
As he did so, he fingered the ring that he wore on the third finger of his right hand. This was a commitment ring. Carson and Rodney were more that friends and colleagues. They were lovers. Carson would be the first one to tell you that loving Rodney wasn't the easiest thing to do. There were days when he was amazed that they had managed to get together in the first place. His thoughts drifted back to how he and Rodney had got together.
It all began in the Antarctic base. Carson wasn't sure why it happened. After all, it wasn't like Rodney McKay was the most handsome man in the world. Nor was he the wittiest, or the most charming. Even some of his table manners left more than a little to be desired. And yet, there was something that Carson found irresistible about the man and that was the problem. Back then, all that Rodney saw in Carson was the fact that he was the strongest ATA gene carrier on the base.
Carson hated this. It wasn't as if he liked working with chair anyway. He was more at home in a medical lab surrounded by medical equipment and things that he understood. The chair scared him. He knew he could make it work and that it had something to do with the ATA gene but he still didn't know how he did it. That coupled with the distraction of the man who was in charge just didn't really help at all.
As Carson stood and thought about it, he realized that their relationship had been a bit like flying kites. When he was a child, he had loved kite flying. He hadn't found it at all easy but when he finally managed to master it, it was the most amazing feeling ever. He loved the way that the kite would dance in the wind. But he came to learn that kite flying could be unpredictable. Strong winds could come and go anytime. Rodney was as unpredictable as the wind.
When Carson met Rodney he came over as being a snarky self-assured genius and 'self-assured' genius and scientist who didn't seek out the company of others. He wanted things done his way. When others didn't meet his exacting standards, he didn't hesitate to tell them so.
When he went to Atlantis, this began to change. He became part of a team and began to strike up a strong friendship with John Sheppard, military leader of the expedition after Col. Sumner was killed. In Carson's eyes they became like brothers and it was as if Rodney began to look up to John. He also became friends with Carson.
Of course it wasn't always smooth sailing; Rodney being Rodney was sometimes a victim of his own genius. He didn't suffer fools gladly and he didn't like to be told that he was wrong. The man who seemed to get the brunt of this was Dr. Radek Zelenka, his number two in the science department. This was evident in the incident of Doranda. After Rodney had managed to blow up five sixths of a solar system he had a lot of bridges to rebuild.
Carson watched all this from the sidelines. He wanted to go up to him, to comfort him, tell him it would be alright. He wanted to tell him how he felt. But he just couldn't bring him himself to do it. He reasoned that it was because he didn't want to ruin his friendship; but he knew it was because he was scared. After all, Rodney had given no indication that he was gay. And, if he was honest, he would rather have him as a friend than risk it all on something that was a dream.
Of course there were times when he nearly gave in. When he nearly told him how he felt. These were the times when he had nearly lost him. Such as the time where Rodney and his team came in to contact with the nanovirus, or the time when he had nearly died when trying to ascend. The time that really stuck in his head was when Rodney had been infected by the parasite. He along with everyone else had had to watch his friend seem to die by degrees with there being nothing they could do. During that time Rodney made videos to chart the progress of the problem. It was only when everything had been resolved and Rodney had been saved that Carson found something that gave him hope.
He was looking at the videos when he stopped. "Carson, there's something I wanted to say to you ... while I can still remember ..."
Carson heard his voice off screen. "Go ahead."
Rodney continued, "I... I love you. I... have loved... you for some time."
Rodney then carried on.
That made Carson think; maybe he did have a chance after all. He decided that he would find a way to let him know how he felt. And that chance came sooner than he thought.
Colonel Sheppard and his team had been on a mission to PX1-572. Carson wasn't quite sure what they were doing there. He thought it had something to do with an ancient artifact that was supposed to be there. All he knew for certain was that a few hours in to the mission they had received a message from the Colonel.
"This is Colonel Sheppard to Atlantis. We have come across a village. There is something wrong with their village leader. Their healer has tried everything but there has been no improvement. I know that it may be a long shot... I was wondering if we could get Dr. Beckett to come through and have a look at him."
Richard Woolsey, head of the Atlantis expedition, stood and listened. He considered for a moment. It wouldn't hurt for him to send Dr. Beckett. He was sure that Colonel Sheppard would be able to look after him and keep him safe. After what the Colonel had told him, he had a feeling that he would've told them about the Doctor and he didn't want to disappoint them.
"Alright Colonel. I'll send him through."
"Message understood. Sheppard out." With that the wormhole disconnected.
After a talk with Woolsey Carson found himself in the gate room all geared up and ready to go through. He was still apprehensive as, no matter how many times he did it, he still was ill at ease about going through a wormhole. He'd even gotten Radek to sit down and explain the mechanics of it all. He'd tried asking Rodney but he got lost after the first few sentences. Afterwards he felt even worse. But needs must.
On the other side he was met by Colonel Sheppard. "Hey there doc. Good to see you."
Carson rolled his eyes. "Aye, it's good to see you to. Now where's the patient?"
John gestured over his shoulder with a nod, "he's down in the village."
With that, John led Carson in to the village. On the way down Carson could see a figure standing waiting for them. As they drew nearer the person rushed up to them. He nodded to the Colonel and turned towards Carson.
"Are you healer Beckett?" The man said, "I am healer Jolen. I am sorry to have to bring you here. Our leader has been ill for fourteen lunar cycles. Nothing I have done has made a difference... Colonel Sheppard said that you might be able to help."
Carson nodded. "Aye Lad. I will take a look for you. I can't promise anything but I will do my best."
Jolen led Carson towards the building that served as an infirmary. As he did so, Carson noticed Rodney. He was about to call out to him when he looked up. As Rodney looked at Carson he smiled, then he looked down at his feet. Was he blushing?
"That's wishful thinking lad." he thought to himself.
Jolen took Carson in to the building and led him in to a side room.
"This is leader Orlain." Jolen said, as he led Carson o the side of the bed. Laying his medical bag down by the side of the bed, Carson took a look at the man. He looked frail and his skin was covered in a sheen of sweat; his head felt warm to the touch. It wasn't hard to work out that he had a fever.
As Carson pulled back he sheet that covered him, he noticed that Orlain had a dressing on his stomach. Reaching in to his bag, Carson took out a pair of rubber gloves. Pulling them on, he pulled back the dressing and was met by the smell of infection. The wound was oozing.
"Jolen, I need to drain the infection. I have medication that I can give him to numb the area before I clean it. Do you have anything that you can give him to bring down his temperature?" Carson asked as he sorted and prepped his equipment.
Jolen thought for a moment. "Yes I do. We use Comsalan. It's a natural herb that grows on the planet. It has healing properties, one of which is an ability to help this matter. But I tried it before and it didn't work."
"Aye lad. That's probably because of the infection in the wound." Carson looked at Jolen, "How long has the wound been this bad?"
"Only for the last four lunar cycles. It's possible that there is something in there, but I have been unable to bring it to the surface." Jolen looked at Carson with an apprehensive look on his face.
"It's alright lad." Carson said with a smile. "I'm certain that you've done everything that you can."
Jolen smiled nervously at this and went off to prepare the Comsalan. By the time he came back Carson had managed to find and extract the foreign object from the wound and had cleaned it. He also had it all dressed.
"He needs to have the dressing replaced in the morning. Do you have the Comsalan ready?" Carson asked as he cleared everything up.
"It's here. He needs to drink it and ideally he should have it every four hours." Jolen sighed. "I wanted to go home. It's been three days since I have taken an evening meal with my wife. I like to stay with Orlain at night."
Carson looked at him. "Do you not have anyone else could stay with Orlain?"
"Yes I do but I promised him that I would take good care of him." Jolen said looking towards the bed.
Carson looked at him. "It's alright. I'll stay with him."
Jolen looked at him. "Are you sure?"
Carson smiled. "Go on get out of here before I change my mind."
Carson watched Jolen go. He then settled in to watch his patient. Carson was unaware of how much time had passed when he heard a noise. Looking up in the lamplight he saw a figure coming towards him.
"Hey." It was Rodney. "We noticed that you hadn't joined us for food tonight so I've brought you something."
Carson noticed that he was carrying a tray. Rodney put it down and pulled up a chair. "I also thought that you could do with the company."
Carson looked at Rodney; the light shone in his eyes and made them seem a lovely shade of blue. Carson thanked him and began to eat. They spent the next few hours talking or sitting in silence as Carson took care of Orlain.
The next night Jolen went on his way and Carson sat alone watching his patient. Again Rodney brought Carson his meal. On the third night the same thing happened. Only this time, Rodney brought some food for himself and joined Carson for his evening meal. Carson and he sat and talked. It was a very pleasant way to spend an evening.
The next day Orlain's fever broke. He regained consciousness but was still very groggy. In the evening Orlain was sleeping when Jolen came to speak to Carson.
"Thank you for your time Carson. I'll take over tonight." He said with a smile.
Carson looked at him. "Are you sure?"
"Of course. It's time that you spent some time with your friends. In fact Dr. McKay has expressed a desire to spend some time in your company this evening."
Carson schooled his features, but inside he couldn't help feeling a sense of confusion and hope. Carson had noticed how attentive Rodney had been the last few days, and now he wanted to spend time in his company. Maybe there was a chance that Rodney really did mean what he'd said while under the influence of the parasite, but there was still no way to be sure.
"Damn." Carson thought to himself, "Why can't this be easy?"
"Thank you lad," Carson said with a smile, "It'll be nice to spend an evening with my friends."
Jolen smiled. Go on before I change my mind."
"Thank you lad." Carson said with a smile, "It'll be nice to spend an evening with my friends."
"Go on before I change my mind," Jolen said with a mischievous smile.
Carson couldn't help smiling back as he left the building. As he was head towards the center of the village a familiar figure headed towards him.
"Ah, there you are," Rodney greeted as he got close. "So you're going to be joining us tonight?" Before Carson could do more than nod, Rodney continued, "good. We're taking our meal at the village campfire tonight." Suddenly, Rodney's shy look returned. "I hope you don't mind me asking John to save us a seat together."
Carson found this look very endearing. "No, of course not Rodney, I'll be glad to join you."
Rodney looked up at him and beamed. His smiled was large; it was the kind of smile he had on his face when he discovered a piece of Ancient tech, or solved a long standing problem in the city. Since when did he merit a look like that? It was a confusing if pleasurable experience.
As they reached the campfire they saw John and the team and headed towards them.
"Hey Doc. How are things?" John asked.
"We have the infection under control and have managed to bring down his fever. He regained consciousness this morning. When I left him he was sleeping peacefully. Jolen is looking after him tonight."
"Nice one Doc. I knew you could do it."
"Thank you John. Glad to be able to help."
The rest of the evening was spent eating the food that the villagers had made and enjoying their stories. The team also told him about what they had been doing on the mission before he arrived. Teyla told him all about the village and its people. Ronon talked about how he had joined some of the men on and hunt and how much he had enjoyed it. Rodney talked about a building that they had found that he believed had been an Ancient outpost. He hoped that Woolsey would let him bring a team back to investigate it properly. He then complained that John had been flirting with all the pretty women in the village. John grinned, shook his head and rolled his eyes.
At the end of the evening, as the fire began to die down, people started to drift away. Carson was about to get up to leave when he felt a hand on his own. It was Rodney. Carson looked at him and before he could say anything, Rodney closed the distance between them and kissed him. At first it was hesitant and gentle, but as Carson responded, the kiss deepened and became more passionate.
Pulling Carson to his feet Rodney wrapped his arms around him. Running his tongue over Carson's lips he requested entrance. Carson opened enough to let him in. Rodney ran his tongue around the inside of his mouth. Eventually the lack of air forced them apart.
"Rodney?" Carson said in surprise.
Rodney looked at him. "I don't remember everything I said when I had a parasite in my head, but I do remember telling you the way that I feel about you." Rodney stopped and swallowed hard. "I meant every word. I'm just sorry that it took something like that to make you tell you."
Carson raised his hand to Rodney's face and stroked it over his jaw. "Aye luv. I'm sorry too. I thought I'd lost you before I'd found you. That was the hardest operation that I've ever had to perform. Why didn't tell me how you felt before?"
Rodney bowed his head. "I was going to but... well then we became such good friends that I was too scared. I didn't even know if you were gay."
Carson sighed. "I wish you had told me Rodney. I've had feelings for you since I met you at the Antarctic base." This time it was Rodney's turn to look surprised. "But I do know how you felt. I was scared to tell you too. How can two such clever men be so stupid?"
Rodney laid his forehead against Carson's. "I've heard that love does that to you."
Carson laughed. "We know now. Would you like to spend the night together?"
"What... with you Carson?"
Carson shook his head and smiled. "Yes Rodney, with me."
Rodney blushed, not that Carson could see it, and moved his head to Carson's shoulder. "That would be nice."
With that Carson took Rodney's hand in his and led him to his room. Carson lit the lamp and the room was filled by its soft glow. Rodney's eyes were gleaming as Carson began to undress Rodney. Pulling his pants and briefs down Carson got Rodney to sit down so he could remove them. When Rodney was naked Carson stood him up and looked at him. Carson had always admired the man; his broad shoulders and his strong hands and arms. More than once he had dreamt about seeing Rodney naked before him. Now that he was looking at him for real it was better than any dream.
Carson walked round him, like someone appreciating a work of art. "Beautiful. Truly beautiful. Far better than seeing you in my dreams. Why have you hidden yourself so long my luv?"
Carson ran his finger over Rodney's skin. Each touch sent a jolt of electricity from his skin to his groin coming to rest in his cock. It was hard and erect.
Carson looked down at Rodney's cock. He took Rodney in hand and stroked him slowly. With his other hand, he weighed Rodney's balls. "Magnificent Rodney," Carson's voice sounded almost reverential.
Rodney leaned it to Carson's touch. The sound of his words hit Rodney deep in the soul. He had never thought that he would find someone who seemed to love him like that.
"Carson I... I..." the words were lost in his throat as he started to cry.
Carson looked at Rodney. Letting go of his cock and balls, he took Rodney in his arms and pulled him towards him. Rodney whimpered as the cloth of Carson's jacket rubbed against his nipples.
"What is it luv?"
Rodney pulled back a little before continuing. "When I was younger my mother used to taunt me. She didn't think that being a genius was anything special. Sometimes she would be really mean and tell me that I would never amount to anything. That I would just grow old and fat and end up being alone. But now.... now I have you and.... you love me. I proved her wrong didn't I."
Carson held on to him tightly and he put his hand on his back. "Yes you did and I will always be here for you. Now what do you want Rodney? Tell me." Carson asked as he moved his hand up and down.
Rodney stuttered. "I... I... I want you to... fuck me."
To Carson a fuck was something you did on a one night stand with someone you would most likely never see again. Close encounters in places you would wouldn't normally go with people you would and never could care about. Rodney deserved more than that. And Carson was going to give it to him. He cared about Rodney more than he had done about anyone before.
"No Rodney I'm going to make love to you. Now lie down on the bed and spread your legs out for me."
Carson watched as Rodney laid on the bed, his cock bouncing on his stomach. Reaching in to his bag he got out some lube and slicked his fingers. First he inserted one and then another; stretching Rodney to prepare him. Rodney relaxed into the sensation. Carson was taking his time to make this something meaningful. After what Rodney had said about his mother Carson needed to show him what he felt about him and this was it.
Taking out his fingers, Carson heard Rodney sigh. "It's alright lad. I'm just going to get a condom."
"No Carson. No condoms. Want to feel you. Want this... this to be..." Rodney stopped, his voice almost pleading.
"All right then my love." It wasn't as if it would really matter. Carson knew that Rodney was clean and he was.
Before he entered Rodney he leant down and licked from the just above Rodney's anus to the tip of his cock and back again. Carson looked up in time to see Rodney shiver as he looked at him, begging him to enter him. Without another word he rubbed a little lube on to his cock and entered Rodney. Placing Rodney's legs over his shoulders Carson gasped at Rodney's tightness as he eased himself in. Rodney in turn moaned as Carson entered him. Rodney's eyes were wide with lust and yet his look managed to convey a sense of trust. Carson was undone by this.
After pressing himself in totally Carson stopped to let Rodney adjust. Rodney's head tipped back and he moaned and Carson took that as his permission to carry on. He began to move slowly at first, savouring each moment. He also savoured the look on Rodney's face. It was one of complete abandon. It was a look that Carson had never seen before but hoped that he would see again.
Carson abandoned himself in the feelings that came with having himself sheathed within Rodney. He began to move faster and faster; the heat of Rodney sheathing Carson's cock was almost too much for him to bear. It took all his self control not to come there and then. But Carson was determined to make it last for Rodney. His resolve was nearly undone when he watched as Rodney grabbed hold of his cock and started to rub his hand up and down in time to each of Carson's thrusts.
"Carson, Carson, Carson." Rodney chanted his name as if it was a mantra. Each call of his name sounded breathless and needy at the same time. "CARSON," with on final shout Rodney cried out as his body convulsed and he came across his stomach.
As he did Rodney clenched his ass around Carson's cock. The look on Rodney's face, the feeling of his come slicking their bellies, and the vice like grip around his own dick finally pushed Carson over the edge. With a few more ragged thrusts, Carson let go, thrusting deeply into his lover as he groaned and came hard. He felt as if fire was coursing down his spine as he slowly collapsed onto Rodney. As his cock softened, Carson slipped out of Rodney. He fell on to the bed beside his lover and pulled him close. He listened to Rodney's breathing as his own started to settle.
Carson slipped out of the bed and padded to the bathroom, coming back with a cloth. As he went to clean Rodney up, he stopped to look at him. He looked sated and, for the first time in a long time, he looked at peace.
"Hey there... " Rodney looked at him and gave him a sloppy grin. "That was... mmmm, worth waiting for."
Carson smiled, cleaned him up and went to look at his ass. Rodney lifted his head and looked down at Carson. "What ya doing?" he asked groggily, through the post coital haze.
"Just making sure that everything is okay down there."
Rolling his eyes, Rodney mumbled, "Always the doctor. Now get up here. There are other parts of me that need taking care of."
Carson laughed and joined Rodney on the bed, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him into a cuddle.
"Thank you Carson. I have done that before... it's just that... well to be frank I think, looking back on it, I think they were all pity fucks. Nobody really cared about me and they... just indulged me by staying the night. But they were gone by the morning."
Carson held Rodney tight. "I won't be gone in the morning."
Rodney sighed happily, "I know Carson. This is the real thing."
With that the two of them drifted in to an easy sleep.
The next morning Carson woke up to find his arm draped across Rodney's body. There was something that felt so right about it and he lay still, watching Rodney until his lover finally began to stir. "Hey there, sleepy," Carson said softly.
Rodney rolled over and looked at Carson and gave him the warmest smile that he had ever seen. It made Carson's insides go gooey; he just couldn't help it. Rodney looked at him through half opened eyes. The way that the morning light caught them made them shine. They looked as blue as the ocean around Atlantis on a sunny day. Rodney moved over towards him and kissed him gently on the lips. As he pulled back, he smiled at Carson again.
"Hey there, Carson, it's good to see you." Rodney looked so happy. Carson was pleased that he had been the one to put that look on his face.
Eventually they both got up and ready to go out and face the day. As they dressed they kept looking at each other and smiling. Carson felt like he was flying. They couldn't help grinning as they walked out to meet the rest of the team. John and Ronon gave each other a knowing look as the two men walked towards them.
The rest of the day was spent with Carson checking on Orlain's progress with Rodney close by his side, with the rest of the team taking a good look round the village. Ronon found some more knives to add to his collection and Teyla found some cloth to take home to make in to clothes.
At the end of the day, Carson and Rodney joined the others. "Orlain's going to be okay. He was sitting up and talking. Jolen says that he feels that he should be able to administer his medicines from now on. We are able to leave as soon as we like."
John nodded. An hour or so later they found themselves at the gate. Jolen was with them.
He walked up to Carson and gave him a hug. "You have our eternal gratitude. Thank you for your help, Doctor."
"You're welcome." Carson smiled as he turned to watch Rodney dial the DHD.
With the familiar sound of the gate dialing and the wormhole establishing, the team headed back to Atlantis. It was good to get back, especially for Rodney and Carson. As time went by they found great solace in their relationship, but Carson wanted more. He really wanted to show Rodney just how much he meant to him. It was then he thought about having a commitment ceremony. As per usual in the Pegasus galaxy real life got in the way.
After the defeat of the Wraith, Carson managed to land the city in the water just off San Francisco. As he walked onto the balcony he saw Rodney standing with John, Ronon, Teyla and the expedition leader Richard Woolsey. Making his way to stand beside Rodney, he reached out for his hand. Rodney smiled and took Carson's hand as they looked out to the Golden Gate Bridge. It felt strange to be home. Carson felt as if his life had turned full circle. Here would be the perfect place for a commitment ceremony. He knew it wouldn't be binding in the eyes of the law, but that didn't matter. It would be binding for him. Carson knew that Rodney was the one for him, and nothing that they could say or do would change that.
A month later, Rodney, Carson and a small group of people stood on the same balcony. They'd decided to have the ceremony on Atlantis. They knew that their families would be mad but they could always do something later. Teyla had said that the Athosians had such a ceremony and that both Rodney and Carson would need someone to stand with them.
"It is our tradition."
Rodney turned to his friend John and Carson asked Ronon if he would do it. Both men accepted; glad to be able to be part of the ceremony. They had also asked if Richard Woolsey wished to be there too. As head of the expedition and the man who, in his own way, helped bring them together they wanted him to be there.
There was also an item that was to be used as a sign of their commitment. Carson and Rodney had decided to use rings. John had the ring meant for Carson and Ronon had the ring meant for Rodney.
It was a lovely ceremony; Teyla spoke about the commitment that Rodney and Carson were making and how this would be seen by those who watched over them. Each of the people present were asked why they should be joined in this way. Richard said that they deserved each other; Ronon said that it was about time and John said that they both deserved to be loved.
"I declare my love and commit my life to you Meredith Rodney McKay. There is no one but you in my life and there will be no one else but you from now until the end of time." With that Ronon handed Carson the ring. He slipped it onto Rodney's finger.
"I declare my love and commit my life to you Carson Beckett. There is no one but you in my life and there will be no one else but you from now until the end of time." John handed Rodney the ring. He slipped it on to Carson's finger.
"May those who have gone before look upon you and the commitment you have made. May you be forever blessed and your days together be many." Teyla replied, blessing them.
Everyone who was there clapped and cheered. Richard had arranged a special meal for them in the briefing room. At the end of the meal Rodney and Carson were about to leave when John stopped them.
"Hey guys. Got you a present. Hope you like it."
Rodney opened the gift John handed him. It was the makings of a kite and it resembled a F302.
"You know, I never flew a kite when I was a child. I was never given a chance to do that." Rodney said as he studied the kite.
Richard walked over to them as Carson watched Rodney look at the kite. "Well Doctor, you will have plenty of time to learn. I have arranged for you two take two weeks off so you can spend some time together." Carson watched as Rodney was about to protest, but Woolsey cut him off with a raised hand "I promise you that we'll not let anyone from outside take over the city in your absence. This is our home and I have no intention of losing it to anyone."
With that they walked off to get ready to leave.
That was how he found himself on the beach with Rodney flying the kite. Love was definitely like flying kites; it was unpredictable and uncertain; but when it really worked, it worked. Right now he was flying so high he was up there in the stars.