654 by elementalv (Wish Fulfillment Challenge)
Title: 654
Author: elementalv
Rating: R
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Notes: Just shy of 1,200 words.
Spoilers: This is post-canon, so there are references to events in Enemy at the Gate.
Summary: Teldy has news, Sheppard has issues, and McKay might get his wish. In more or less that order.
~*~*~
“Sir?”
John sighed. He thought he’d managed to knock the formality out of Teldy a while ago, but she still used it whenever she felt the need to assert her military cojones or some other damn thing. Whatever. John didn’t have to cater to that crap. Or maybe he did, since they were on Earth. He sighed again but didn’t stop proofreading his rationale for returning Atlantis to the Pegasus Galaxy when he asked, “Is there a problem, Major?”
“Are you familiar with Title 10, Subtitle A, Part II, Chapter 37, Item 654 of the U.S. Code?”
“As a matter of fact, Major, I could probably recite it word-perfect from memory.” Crap. He really needed to have Teyla take a look at it. She was a hell of a lot better at punctuation than he’d ever been. Better at spelling, too. And grammar. And expressing herself.
“I - you can?” Her uncertain tone made him look up and smile. It wasn’t often that he was able to knock Teldy for a loop, and he wanted to savor the moment.
“I can. Would you like me to?”
She opened her mouth then closed it again. And then she opened her mouth again to say, “No. That won’t - you memorized it?”
“It’s not like I had any choice in the matter. Every time Dr. McKay goes off on a rant about the level of psychosis demonstrated by U.S. military policy, he drags 654 out as his favorite example. So yes, Major. I’m intimately familiar with that particular section of the U.S.C.”
“Right.” She took a deep breath. “So you’re aware that President Obama is repealing it effective thirty days from now?”
John frowned. “I knew he was planning to, but I didn’t think it would hit until 2010. Why the rush?”
“According to CNN, he decided to tie it to stop-loss, Sir, citing the need to ramp up the effort in Afghanistan. Since the Pentagon wants to close whatever loopholes they can insofar as discharges are concerned, President Obama said it makes sense to repeal 654 sooner rather than later.”
“Huh.” He thought about it for a moment then nodded slowly. “He’s got a point.”
“So you don’t have any concerns about the repeal?”
“Not really.” And he didn’t. If nothing else, it would knock that particular rant out of Rodney’s rotation. “Anyway, it’s probably just as well they’re doing it now, while we’re still on Earth.”
“Sir? I don’t understand.”
Maybe Lorne could persuade her to knock off the “sir” crap. “On the off-chance we have any soldiers who have issues with any announcements made after the repeal goes into effect, it’ll be easier to rotate them out while we’re still here.” He glanced down at his report. “Hey, if I start a sentence with ‘in addition,’ do I put a comma after ‘addition’?”
“What? Oh. Yes.” She was definitely nervous about something, but he watched and waited for her to speak or leave. Having gotten to know her over the last six months, he was willing to bet she’d speak. And she did. “You aren’t concerned about homosexuality in the ranks?”
“Unless a soldier is swapping spit with a Wraith or, even worse, a Genii, I don’t give a rat’s ass. My only concern is that they do the job.”
“And if one of your staff officers were to -”
“Before you go down that conversational path, Major,” he said gently, “you should remember that while 654 is still on the books, I’m honor-bound to do something if anyone under my command makes a public announcement of his or her homosexuality or bisexuality.” Teldy stiffened up to full attention, and John took a deep breath. “I think my hatred of paperwork is legendary by now, so I’m going to be extremely unhappy with anyone who forces me to discharge them for such a stupid reason. Understood?”
“Yes, Sir. Understood. May I be dismissed?”
“Dismissed.” She saluted smartly and walked out of his office. John sent a quick e-mail to Lorne asking him to please try to explain the reality of John’s command to Teldy one more time, because he was getting sick and goddamned tired of being “sirred” every other sentence. And then, before he sent the e-mail, he attached his formal request to send Atlantis home and asked Lorne to take another look at it.
~*~*~
John came out of the bathroom and dropped one of his towels on Rodney’s head. “Well? What do you think?”
Rodney batted at the towel until it fell to the floor. “I think you can’t spell to save yourself. How the hell did you graduate the Academy?”
“My good looks and stellar math skills.” John scratched his armpit and asked, “Seriously. Is it any good? You think the IOA will buy it?”
“Hm. Maybe. I think you have too much emphasis on weapons research,” he said, crossing out a paragraph. “I can’t tell you how much I’m going to miss being able to print and mark hard copy whenever I feel like it.”
“If that’s the only downside you can think of for returning to Pegasus -”
“Trust me, it’s not. And you forgot to put in my section on the need to locate and explore Ancient outposts.”
“I didn’t forget it, I left it out on purpose. It’s too long.” While Rodney spluttered over that pronouncement, John removed the towel around his waist and pulled a pair of underwear out of his dresser. He glanced at Rodney’s back, thought for a moment, and then put the underwear back in the drawer. “Hey.”
“I can’t believe -”
John stood behind Rodney and slowly moved his hand down Rodney’s chest and to his groin. It was enough to stem the flow of words. “Remember that wish you made when I was blowing your birthday candle the other night?”
“God, you’re disgusting,” Rodney said, lifting up a little and spreading his legs to give John better access.
“You love it,” he whispered straight into Rodney’s ear. He reached down with his other hand to open Rodney’s trousers. “Anyway, word is that 654 will be repealed in thirty days.”
“Fine, fine,” he said impatiently. “Would you please get a move on?”
“Aw, Rodney. Aren’t you a little upset that you won’t be able to yell at me anymore about ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’?” John freed Rodney’s dick from his boxers and started stripping it with a squeeze and a twist at the head. Rodney always went a little nuts when John did that. Honestly, John went a little nuts, too, especially when Rodney turned his head just enough to capture John’s mouth with a kiss. And god, he didn’t think he’d ever get enough of Rodney’s mouth, which was just as grabby and demanding and intrusive as the rest of Rodney.
Maybe they could talk about getting married later. Like in-the-morning later, because Rodney was making those noises that told John he was about three strokes from coming, and it would be a damn shame if John didn’t get to blow that birthday candle.
Author: elementalv
Rating: R
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Notes: Just shy of 1,200 words.
Spoilers: This is post-canon, so there are references to events in Enemy at the Gate.
Summary: Teldy has news, Sheppard has issues, and McKay might get his wish. In more or less that order.
~*~*~
“Sir?”
John sighed. He thought he’d managed to knock the formality out of Teldy a while ago, but she still used it whenever she felt the need to assert her military cojones or some other damn thing. Whatever. John didn’t have to cater to that crap. Or maybe he did, since they were on Earth. He sighed again but didn’t stop proofreading his rationale for returning Atlantis to the Pegasus Galaxy when he asked, “Is there a problem, Major?”
“Are you familiar with Title 10, Subtitle A, Part II, Chapter 37, Item 654 of the U.S. Code?”
“As a matter of fact, Major, I could probably recite it word-perfect from memory.” Crap. He really needed to have Teyla take a look at it. She was a hell of a lot better at punctuation than he’d ever been. Better at spelling, too. And grammar. And expressing herself.
“I - you can?” Her uncertain tone made him look up and smile. It wasn’t often that he was able to knock Teldy for a loop, and he wanted to savor the moment.
“I can. Would you like me to?”
She opened her mouth then closed it again. And then she opened her mouth again to say, “No. That won’t - you memorized it?”
“It’s not like I had any choice in the matter. Every time Dr. McKay goes off on a rant about the level of psychosis demonstrated by U.S. military policy, he drags 654 out as his favorite example. So yes, Major. I’m intimately familiar with that particular section of the U.S.C.”
“Right.” She took a deep breath. “So you’re aware that President Obama is repealing it effective thirty days from now?”
John frowned. “I knew he was planning to, but I didn’t think it would hit until 2010. Why the rush?”
“According to CNN, he decided to tie it to stop-loss, Sir, citing the need to ramp up the effort in Afghanistan. Since the Pentagon wants to close whatever loopholes they can insofar as discharges are concerned, President Obama said it makes sense to repeal 654 sooner rather than later.”
“Huh.” He thought about it for a moment then nodded slowly. “He’s got a point.”
“So you don’t have any concerns about the repeal?”
“Not really.” And he didn’t. If nothing else, it would knock that particular rant out of Rodney’s rotation. “Anyway, it’s probably just as well they’re doing it now, while we’re still on Earth.”
“Sir? I don’t understand.”
Maybe Lorne could persuade her to knock off the “sir” crap. “On the off-chance we have any soldiers who have issues with any announcements made after the repeal goes into effect, it’ll be easier to rotate them out while we’re still here.” He glanced down at his report. “Hey, if I start a sentence with ‘in addition,’ do I put a comma after ‘addition’?”
“What? Oh. Yes.” She was definitely nervous about something, but he watched and waited for her to speak or leave. Having gotten to know her over the last six months, he was willing to bet she’d speak. And she did. “You aren’t concerned about homosexuality in the ranks?”
“Unless a soldier is swapping spit with a Wraith or, even worse, a Genii, I don’t give a rat’s ass. My only concern is that they do the job.”
“And if one of your staff officers were to -”
“Before you go down that conversational path, Major,” he said gently, “you should remember that while 654 is still on the books, I’m honor-bound to do something if anyone under my command makes a public announcement of his or her homosexuality or bisexuality.” Teldy stiffened up to full attention, and John took a deep breath. “I think my hatred of paperwork is legendary by now, so I’m going to be extremely unhappy with anyone who forces me to discharge them for such a stupid reason. Understood?”
“Yes, Sir. Understood. May I be dismissed?”
“Dismissed.” She saluted smartly and walked out of his office. John sent a quick e-mail to Lorne asking him to please try to explain the reality of John’s command to Teldy one more time, because he was getting sick and goddamned tired of being “sirred” every other sentence. And then, before he sent the e-mail, he attached his formal request to send Atlantis home and asked Lorne to take another look at it.
~*~*~
John came out of the bathroom and dropped one of his towels on Rodney’s head. “Well? What do you think?”
Rodney batted at the towel until it fell to the floor. “I think you can’t spell to save yourself. How the hell did you graduate the Academy?”
“My good looks and stellar math skills.” John scratched his armpit and asked, “Seriously. Is it any good? You think the IOA will buy it?”
“Hm. Maybe. I think you have too much emphasis on weapons research,” he said, crossing out a paragraph. “I can’t tell you how much I’m going to miss being able to print and mark hard copy whenever I feel like it.”
“If that’s the only downside you can think of for returning to Pegasus -”
“Trust me, it’s not. And you forgot to put in my section on the need to locate and explore Ancient outposts.”
“I didn’t forget it, I left it out on purpose. It’s too long.” While Rodney spluttered over that pronouncement, John removed the towel around his waist and pulled a pair of underwear out of his dresser. He glanced at Rodney’s back, thought for a moment, and then put the underwear back in the drawer. “Hey.”
“I can’t believe -”
John stood behind Rodney and slowly moved his hand down Rodney’s chest and to his groin. It was enough to stem the flow of words. “Remember that wish you made when I was blowing your birthday candle the other night?”
“God, you’re disgusting,” Rodney said, lifting up a little and spreading his legs to give John better access.
“You love it,” he whispered straight into Rodney’s ear. He reached down with his other hand to open Rodney’s trousers. “Anyway, word is that 654 will be repealed in thirty days.”
“Fine, fine,” he said impatiently. “Would you please get a move on?”
“Aw, Rodney. Aren’t you a little upset that you won’t be able to yell at me anymore about ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’?” John freed Rodney’s dick from his boxers and started stripping it with a squeeze and a twist at the head. Rodney always went a little nuts when John did that. Honestly, John went a little nuts, too, especially when Rodney turned his head just enough to capture John’s mouth with a kiss. And god, he didn’t think he’d ever get enough of Rodney’s mouth, which was just as grabby and demanding and intrusive as the rest of Rodney.
Maybe they could talk about getting married later. Like in-the-morning later, because Rodney was making those noises that told John he was about three strokes from coming, and it would be a damn shame if John didn’t get to blow that birthday candle.