In the Arms of Atlas by liketheriver (Amnesty 2008, Gods and Monsters challenge)

[liketheriverrun]

Title: In the Arms of Atlas
Genre: slashy gen/ preslash with Team
Rating: T.
Word count: ~9500
Warning: None
Spoilers: Anything through Season 5 but nothing really
Author Notes: This fic definitely is preslash in my mind, but I think you could read it as gen given the situation. I'll leave it up to the reader to make that decision. Thanks as always to Koschka for the beta.
Summary: “So, what?” Sheppard demanded. “The Ancients built this planet their own personal Death Star?” When Rodney grinned wickedly at the idea, John saw where the scientist’s thoughts were going and grinned in return. “Think we could build one of our own?”


In the Arms of Atlas

by liketheriver

"Prometheus: I am distressed by the fate of my brother Atlas, who, towards the west, stands bearing on his shoulders the pillar of heaven and earth, a burden not easy for his arms to grasp."

~ Aeschylus, Prometheus Bound

Sheppard didn’t know exactly what to expect of the Ancient facility on the Keendan’s home world. Despite extensive searches in the Atlantean database, Rodney couldn’t find anything that met the description provided by the Travelers who had come across the planet during their exploration of Pegasus. There was a gate in orbit around the planet, a facility that was obviously of Ancient design, and a people who knew the outpost could protect them from the Wraith based on stories passed down for countless generations, but no idea how to make it work. Larrin’s people had immediately thought of the expedition who had claimed the City of the Ancestor’s as their own and offered to fly John’s team and a Jumper to meet the Keendans since the address to the gate was unknown. Once there, the address of the space gate wouldn’t be necessary since they could simply dial out to Atlantis any time they needed to check in or return to the city, and hopefully by then, Radek would have had better luck than McKay in finding the gate’s address. Larrin herself vouched for the safety of the Keendans, who were a simple people who sustained themselves with farming and eagerly traded with the Travelers as their only means of contact with other worlds.

John had gone into the whole situation with a bit of trepidation. There was often a reason why the Ancients put a gate in orbit instead of on the planet itself, usually in order to keep whatever was on the surface from leaving or being accessed by anyone except the Ancients. But the promise of not just one, but two control chairs in the facility had McKay ready to pack his bags that very day. Rodney also had a very good point when he mentioned that two chairs may mean two ZPM banks, and surely at least some of them might still be operational. The last was enough to have Woolsey giving the green light to check out the facility.

But the half erected platform hovering in a low geosynchronous orbit above the planet that they saw from the bridge of the Traveler’s ship had Sheppard simultaneously curious and concerned.

"What the hell is that?" he demanded, thinking in the back of his mind that it looked kind of familiar.

"No one knows," Larrin told him. "The Keendans aren’t even aware that it’s here. But we figured it had something to do with the chairs in the facility."

"It looks like a smaller version of the Ancient satellite weapon," Rodney observed as he studied the structure with the same expression as John.

"So, what?" Sheppard demanded. "The Ancients built this planet their own personal Death Star?" When Rodney grinned wickedly at the idea, John saw where the scientist’s thoughts were going and grinned in return. "Think we could build one of our own?"

"I think the plans are down in that outpost somewhere," McKay confirmed.

John shook his head in amazement. "You realize that Ellis will birth a litter of kittens on the bridge of the Apollo if you manage to give him a weapons system like that, don’t you?"

Rodney just grinned wider and rocked back on his heels.

Teyla, however, frowned in confusion. "That structure is a weapon and you plan to build another?"

"Think of the potential of having a couple of those babies orbiting Atlantis," Rodney pointed out. "We could cut a Wraith fleet to ribbons."

"Do you not remember what happened the last time you tried to make an Ancient weapon operational, Rodney?"

Teyla’s reminder had Larrin inquiring warily, "What happened?"

McKay, however, rolled his eyes. "The Dorandan weapon system was flawed in design. If this one is already functional, making another shouldn’t be any real risk… at least not a big one."

"What happened with the Dorandan system," Larrin questioned again when she didn’t receive an answer.

Ronon snorted and shook his head. "You should probably move your ship out of this solar system just to be on the safe side because the last solar system isn’t there anymore."

Larrin’s eyes widened in alarm but John ignored her just like he ignored Teyla and Ronon’s concerns. Because this had the potential to be huge.

* * * *

Larrin had been right; the Keendans greeted them warmly, eagerly showing them the facility that had McKay practically bouncing with excitement once he hacked his way into the database. It didn’t take long for the physicist to determine the purpose of the facility and he hadn’t been far off base with his suppositions. The chairs were designed to work in tandem with one another.  One, situated in an open room similar to the chair room on Atlantis, acted as the controls for construction and operations of the weapon, and the other, down in the data center, provided secondary support of design during construction and logistics during a battle. And then there were the four functioning ZPMs that had Rodney squatting with his head between his knees to keep from passing out from happiness.

In less than three hours, McKay had the power systems to the weapon online and John took up a position in the main chair with Teyla nearby. Ronon was with Rodney who was to be operating the second chair. As Sheppard leaned back, a holographic image of the planet with the weapons platform floating above it appeared in the air above him. Reaching out with his mind, John gave a cursory nudge at the satellite, causing it to rotate its position.

"Easy, Sheppard, you don’t want to knock it out of orbit," McKay warned.

"Don’t worry, I’m just feeling it out," John assured him.

From her spot near the door, Teyla asked, "Is there a reason I should be worried?"

"No," John explained. "McKay’s just being antsy is all." Not that John could really blame him considering what happened the last time Rodney had played around with an Ancient weapons system. Still, Sheppard was just as familiar with that disaster as McKay, and he had no intention of pushing the satellite without the okay from McKay.

"Rodney?" The confusion in Teyla’s voice was obvious.

Sheppard furrowed his brow at her tone. "Yeah, he just told me to be careful with what I was trying."

"Rodney is three levels down with Ronon and he has not transmitted any warnings across the radio."

"Is your radio working?" he asked her, because John had most definitely heard McKay speak.

"I heard your transmission fine," Teyla told him.

Keying his radio again, Sheppard called, "Rodney, can you copy?"

"Reading you loud and clear," McKay responded, and Teyla nodded that she, too, had heard the transmission.

This time, John didn’t speak aloud. "Can you hear me now?"

"Yes, I hear you." Rodney’s reply was more than a little irritated. "Are you having radio problems or just trying to be annoying?"

"I’m not using my radio," Sheppard thought at him once more, grinning smugly to himself when Teyla stared at him as she realized what was happening.

"What?" McKay demanded in his ear.

"You don’t have to yell, Rodney," John told him mentally. "In fact, you don’t have to speak at all."

The next time John heard Rodney’s voice, it wasn’t through the radio and it was tinged with disbelief. "Are you serious?"

"Yep." John settled back comfortably in the chair as he asked, "So, are we going to do this thing or not?"

* * * *

After an entire day of system checks wherein John tested individual components and Rodney analyzed the data being fed to him, they found four systems with critical malfunctions that needed repairs. Two of them Rodney was able to find a way to reroute and reboot until things seemed to be fully operational, mentally feeding the fixes to Sheppard who carried them out.  The other two would require major repairs or even replacement of parts that were no longer operational.

"You believe this weapons system can actually be brought back fully online?" Woolsey asked through the radio as Sheppard and McKay sat in the Jumper in front of the wormhole back to Atlantis.

"I think we’re awfully damn close to having it operational," John told him. "If we can repair the damaged components."

"Colonel, need I remind you that you don’t have space suits with you? From the schematics you’ve sent back, the satellite doesn’t seem large enough to support a chamber with breathable atmosphere."

"McKay thinks we can make the repairs from the surface," John informed Woolsey.

"But I thought they would require hands on repairs?"

Sheppard looked over to where Rodney was half slumped in the copilot’s seat. "Rodney, you want to explain your idea?"

At John’s coaxing, McKay sat straighter. "Oh, yeah, it’s actually quite simple. The outpost used nanite technology to build the system in the first place."

"You mean replicators," Woolsey corrected from through the gate.

"Basically, yes," Rodney admitted before continuing. "But these aren’t nearly as complex or sophisticated as the human form replicators. They simply build the parts that we need based on the directions we give and then deactivate."

Woolsey hesitated on the other end. "And they cannot develop sentient thought?"

Rodney sighed and scrubbed at his face. "Look, we’re not building Skynet here. I’ve checked the base coding three times and there is nothing in there except the most basic commands to build per our directions."

Sheppard and McKay sat waiting expectantly for the expedition leader’s decision.

"Very well, you have a go to exact the repairs. But do not test the weapon until you report back and I get permission from the SGC. The Daedalus is still a week out from your location, so there’s no help coming from us if you run into trouble."

"We’ll check in tomorrow if not sooner," Sheppard promised with a relieved smile that they had their approval.

"I’ll be eager to hear of your progress. And, Colonel, be careful."

"Aren’t we always?"

"I’d rather not think about that right now," Woolsey grumbled before disconnecting. "Atlantis out."

John turned the Jumper back toward the planet, glancing over to where McKay resumed his slump. "What’s the matter? I figured I’d have to suffer through a dance of joy now that you have the go ahead on the repairs."

Rodney yawned. "I don’t dance."

"Well, you usually don’t start to fall asleep as soon as you get permission to play with Ancient doohickeys.

"I would hardly consider a weapons system a doohickey. It’s a highly complex… multifaceted… integrated…" Rodney’s hand waved as if to coax out the proper word before he finally settled on, "…doohickey."

John snorted before studying McKay more closely. "Seriously, are you okay?"

"Yes," he snapped. "Christ, I managed to get a weapon that hasn’t been operational in over ten thousand years up to ninety percent ready status today. Excuse me if I’m not firing on all cylinders here. It’s just been a really long day."

Sometimes Sheppard forgot how easy it was for him with the Ancient equipment and how exhausting they could be for those who didn’t have the strength of his gene, especially the chairs. The life signs detectors were one thing, even the Jumpers weren’t too bad, but the chairs required a great deal of concentration for those who weren’t used to them. But a meal and good night’s sleep would probably fix Rodney right up.

"Well, you better rest up," John advised. "I have a feeling we have a few more long days ahead of us."

* * * *

It took almost two days to complete the repairs. The first few parts took longer to construct than the rest, but eventually Rodney stopped trying to use words to mentally convey the necessary steps and just started sending images to Sheppard and the process speeded up exponentially. The two fell into an easy rhythm with McKay ultimately being able to catch what John was doing wrong before he even did it and sending messages to correct the process before Sheppard went too far off the mark.

"John?" The touch to John’s arm had him opening his eyes to focus on Teyla’s face staring down on him in concern.

"What’s wrong?" he asked, eager to get back to the work at hand.

"I have been calling your name but you did not respond. Nor did you respond to Ronon’s hail through the radio."

Sheppard shook his head to clear it. "Sorry, I was just concentrating on the repairs." In the back of his mind he could still feel Rodney feeding him information and he had the sensation of dreaming he was awake since he couldn’t fully concentrate on either Teyla or McKay.

"Yes, you and Rodney have been very intent on your work. Perhaps you should rest and eat something," Teyla suggested.

"I’m fine," John dismissed. "I’m not even hungry."

"John, you have been working for almost eight hours straight without a break."

Sheppard blinked in surprise. "Eight hours?"

"Yes," Teyla confirmed. "Ronon is concerned about Rodney and so am I."

"What’s wrong with McKay? He seems fine to me." In fact, John could sense the annoyance in Rodney’s thoughts floating around in his now that McKay wasn’t getting any feedback from Sheppard.

"He does not look well," Teyla informed him. "You know he does not do well when he goes too long without food."

John frowned at the reminder, and if they really had been at it for eight hours then McKay really should eat something. But they were so damn close to finishing the part they were working on that he hated to stop.

"Look, give us ten more minutes, twenty tops to finish up what we’re working on, and we’ll take a dinner break."

"I do not think it is wise to wait…"

Sheppard cut her off. "Just go get the food, bring it back here, and we’ll stop when you get back. Okay?"

Teyla sighed. "Very well. But when I return, you both will leave the chairs and take a rest break."

"You got it," John promised with a reassuring smile to counter Teyla’s warning. Laying his head back in the chair, he called to Rodney, "Okay, let’s get back to work."

"I have been working," McKay snapped in his head. "What the hell have you been doing?"

"Teyla was bugging me, but I think I got rid of her for a little while, so let’s see if we can finish this up before she gets back."

But it only seemed to be a few minutes before his shoulder was shaken roughly. "John!"

Sheppard’s eyes flew open and he snarled, "What the fuck is your problem?" Teyla took a step back from his outburst and the anger seeped out John as Teyla’s face came more into focus and he could see the stricken expression. "Oh, hey, Teyla…" he stammered.

Teyla squared her shoulders and ordered. "You have been working for far too long. You need to leave the chairs and come eat. The food I brought over an hour ago is already cold."

Maybe she was right, maybe he had been working too long, because yelling at Teyla was not something John ever did. Not unless he planned to have his kneecaps busted the next time they sparred. So he nodded in agreement. "Yeah, okay, that’s a good idea."

Deactivating the chair, Sheppard sat up and instantly felt the connection to McKay sever, as well. The momentary disorientation brought about by the sensation had Teyla taking his arm to steady him. "I guess you were right about that food," John admitted a bit abashed as he straightened.

Teyla released her hold on him, but stayed close in case he stumbled again. "Perhaps next time you will heed my advice before either you or Rodney reaches this state in the future."

By the time John and Teyla met up with their teammates, Rodney was staring listlessly at the food in front of him. Ronon thumped the pale man on the shoulder, rousing him with a stern reminder. "Eat."

McKay took up his fork and stabbed another piece of meat, his only acknowledgment that John had joined him at the table was to scoot over on the bench to make room for Sheppard to sit beside him. Sheppard frowned at Rodney’s state as he took the offered seat without even considering the empty bench on the opposite side of the table. "Christ, McKay, why didn’t say something? You’ve never been shy about bitching when you were hungry before."

Rodney spoke around the mouthful of food he chewed slowly. "Honestly, I didn’t even really notice it."

"Me either," John admitted, his own stomach growling at the smell of food now that it was in front of him. Unlike McKay, John dug into the meal eagerly. "It’s like I’m completely in the zone. I’ve gotta tell you, these chairs are some pretty cool shit."

Ronon picked at a piece of fruit left on his mostly empty plate. "So you two have made a lot of progress on the weapon?"

"Tons," Sheppard confirmed. "In a few more hours we’ll probably have the entire system operational."

Rodney seemed to slump a little more at the prospect of the additional work and Teyla stepped in. "Then there is no need to continue working tonight." It wasn’t until she mentioned it that John realized the sun had already set on the planet.

"Well, seeing as we’re so close to finishing, it seems a shame to stop now." Looking at Rodney’s plate where the man was moving a pile of vegetables around without eating them, he backtracked. "But I’ll leave it up to McKay."

When Rodney didn’t answer, Teyla inquired, "Is there a problem with your food, Rodney? You are usually much more… enthusiastic at mealtimes."

"What?" As if Teyla’s observation reminded him he was supposed to eat, Rodney took another bite. "No, it’s fine. I was just thinking about the repairs."

"That’s the spirit," John coaxed with a bump to McKay’s shoulder as he took another large bite, prompting Rodney to do the same. The fact was, Sheppard hadn’t been this excited about something in a really long time. The possibilities were incredible. Not just for the defense of Atlantis and other worlds in the Pegasus galaxy, but even Earth could possibly put it to use with the Antarctic base. He couldn’t stop his excited smile. "I mean, we’re building a goddamn weapons satellite, McKay. Can you believe it?"

Rodney’s lips curled in response to John’s enthusiasm and a little color returned to his face as he admitted, "It is pretty amazing, isn’t it?"

"Hell, yes, it’s amazing," John agreed. Because if they could build a satellite, what was to stop them from building other things they might need? Jumpers, Aurora class battle cruises… hell, they could even build an entire city or a stargate. The possibilities were absolutely endless. With those thoughts, he turned his full attention to the meal, totally stoked to get back in the chair and back to work.

* * * *

"Standby for weapon activation in five, four, three…" Rodney was speaking out loud for the benefit of Teyla, who was now with him to monitor the external controls in his room, and Ronon, who was watching the holographic display above John’s head.

They had received permission to test the system within a few hours of completing the repairs. Sheppard had used the Jumper to deploy a large piece of metal debris up into orbit around the planet before returning to his chair to test the weapon.

"Hold firing," Teyla interrupted the countdown. "There is a warning on the guidance system."

John gripped the arms to the chair to keep from growling in frustration. So close. They were so damn close and he could feel Rodney’s irritation feeding his own.

"It’s not used to having such a small target," McKay explained. "It was never meant to lock onto anything smaller than a Dart."

"Well, seeing as I only had the Jumper to work with, I was kind of limited in what I could haul up there," John grumbled.

"We’ll have to compensate is all," Rodney told him. "I’ll override the automatic controls and we’ll control the firing trajectory manually."

"Is that wise?" Teyla asked.

John rolled his eyes at how cautious she was being on this mission.  "Piece of cake. Right, McKay?"

"Actually, it’s probably best to trust our judgment more than the automatic systems at this point."

"Exactly," John concurred. "So let fire this sucker already."

"Overriding automatic controls now." With Rodney’s report, John could feel the satellite literally waiting for his command. Apparently, so did McKay. "Sheppard? Everything under control?"

"It just feels a little weird. Give me a second." The sensation was a lot like climbing on a new horse and having to establish who exactly was calling the shots, and Sheppard put all of his concentration into taking control of the satellite. Once the weapon seemed to stabilize in his mind, John told him, "Okay, I’m good."

Rodney didn’t seem too convinced. "Sure?"

Mentally settling into the satellite’s control a little more, John took a deep breath, finally starting to feel the control meld naturally with his thoughts. "Yeah, I am now."

McKay must have felt the same thing because he resumed his countdown. "Five, four, three, two, one. Fire!"

Rodney’s calculations to correct the trajectory flowed easily into Sheppard and he adjusted the pitch and yaw of the satellite before releasing the full power of the weapon on the floating debris. If he hadn’t known it was impossible, John would have swore the fire of the laser had come from inside him because, for a split second, his whole body burned with the scorching heat of the light, causing him to gasp as he arched up off the chair.

"Sheppard!"

Ronon’s voice was muted, seeming to come from a long ways away. So was Teyla’s when it reported needlessly through the radio, "You have successfully destroyed the debris." Because John knew the test had been a success, knew it with every fiber of his being that was still humming with the achievement and practically begging to do it again.

But as distant as Ronon and Teyla seemed, Rodney’s voice was right there in his head. "John?" There was a touch of awe and fear and even a little pride in the way McKay said his name.

Sheppard reached out for him, trying to draw Rodney in closer so he could feel it, too. So Rodney could feel the way the satellite was pulsing with power and eagerness and pure energy and how all those things were flowing back into John in a way that made it a little hard to catch his breath. Rodney was part of this, Rodney was helping to make this happen, and Rodney deserved to feel it, too. Because the Wraith wouldn’t stand a chance against them. The Wraith, the Genii, or anybody else who had their eyes on Atlantis just better watch their fucking backs, because no one could hold a candle to what John Sheppard was capable of doing now.

"McKay, we are goddamn rock stars!" he thought back in response.

The sound of Rodney’s relieved laughter filled his ears and his head and rolled through his entire body like a wave.

* * * *

"Colonel, I understand that you’re anxious to continue with your work, but I think it would be prudent to await the arrival of the Daedalus to provide a full team of scientists to assist before you begin construction of a new satellite."

Even though Woolsey couldn’t see it, Sheppard frowned at the stargate floating in front of him. "We don’t need a full team of scientist; McKay and I can handle it."

"And what do you think, Dr. McKay?"

Teyla took Woolsey’s question as her opportunity to step in. "Rodney is not here. He is resting back on the planet."

Her tone had Woolsey asking, "Is everything all right?"

"He’s fine," John assured, because if Rodney wasn’t, surely he of all people would know because of their link through the chairs.

Teyla seemed torn between her trust and loyalty to John and what she felt was her responsibility to her other teammate. Evidently, Woolsey took her silence as a sign that Sheppard may have been oversimplifying the facts. "Teyla?"

"The work is very tiring for Rodney." She ignored John’s scowl and continued. "But I am sure after a full night’s sleep he will be much improved."

"And what about you, Colonel? How are you holding up?"

"Never better," Sheppard told him honestly. "Just eager to put what we’ve learned from this system to work for the benefit of Atlantis."

"Atlantis has gone without that system for over ten thousand years," Woolsey pointed out. "It can wait another five or six days. So, I’ll be expecting to see you and your team back here soon?"

Crap. Woolsey was trying to call them back and that meant it would be almost a week before they were able to return. "Actually, I think we should stay here. Even if we aren’t actually constructing the new satellite, Rodney can start pulling together all the schematics for the team coming from Atlantis. Plus, he hasn’t had a chance to check out anything else in the database. Who knows? Maybe he’ll be able to find the gate address so we don’t have to use the Daedalus like a glorified cross town bus."

"Very well," Woolsey finally relented. "But I expect you to continue your regular check-ins, and if Dr. McKay isn’t feeling better by tomorrow you are to return to Atlantis immediately."

"Oh, absolutely," John swore. "Sheppard out."

John was rather pleased with himself for how things had gone with Woolsey. Teyla, however, looked anything but pleased. "This mission is taking a toll on Rodney’s health. Surely, you can see that."

"How long was McKay awake when the Wraith were on their way to Atlantis that first year? How long were we all awake? We’ve all been tired before. Hell, that’s par for the course.  Rodney’s always bounced back after a little sleep and a hot meal."

"John, this is not the same," Teyla practically pleaded. "Something is not right."

Teyla was obviously worried, and even though John thought she was overreacting, he sighed. "I’m not going to do anything to endanger McKay’s life if it’s not absolutely critical to the mission. After all this time, you have to know I would never do that to any of you. Right?"

Teyla gave a slightly embarrassed smile. "Of course, I know that."

"Then trust me on this. If he says he can’t do the work, I won’t push it. You know Rodney as well as I do; he always has some sort of serious medical condition he’s going on and on about and nine times out of ten it’s nothing." When Teyla just sat silently, John pushed further. "The first word that he says about being too tired to work, I’ll call a stop to it. Okay?"

Teyla finally nodded. "I will stay with him, as well, just to make sure he is not pushing himself too hard."

"There. See? With all of us watching out for him, what could happen?"

Teyla’s smile in return seemed forced, and Sheppard could tell she was still worried. But John had no intentions of letting anything happen to McKay. After all, the work they were doing was too important to risk not having Rodney around to finish the job.

* * * *

"Rodney?"

John cracked the door open to McKay’s room and peeked in to see the man he was looking for was still asleep. Not surprising considering it was past midnight, but the fact was, Sheppard couldn’t sleep. He’d been lying in his bed, foot tapping endlessly against nothing but air as he stared up at the ceiling and chewed on a thumb nail. All he could think about was that the chairs were just a few levels up and waiting for him and Rodney to return. That got him thinking about McKay, and sure he was probably sleeping, but John’s mind just didn’t seem to want to shut down. He had ideas, lots of ideas, that only Rodney would be able to help him with. Ideas for how to construct the satellite, for what they could make after the satellite… or maybe before. And that idea had him creeping down the hall past Teyla’s room and into McKay’s.

"Rodney, you awake?"

Just stepping inside the room had his anxiety lessening. Whatever that drink was they had with dinner must have been loaded with caffeine because he felt like he’d drank an entire pot of coffee by himself. But just seeing McKay made him feel tons better. Rodney could help him with the chair and the plans and what they needed to finish up and start anew. Problem was, Rodney was also passed out flat on his stomach, drooling on his pillow as he snored.

"McKay!"

Rodney jerked awake, looking around the dimly lit room in groggy confusion. "What? What’s wrong?" When his eyes seemed to focus on Sheppard, his bleariness didn’t clear, but the puzzlement seemed to ease and he pushed himself up. "Hey."

John took that as his cue that it was okay to sit beside McKay on the bed. "Good, you’re up. I had an idea that I need to kind of run past you."

Rodney scrubbed at his face, swaying into John’s shoulder. "An idea that couldn’t wait until the light of day?"

"You’re the one who always says you do your best work when everyone else is asleep. Well, everyone else is asleep."

With a sleepy bobble of his head, McKay conceded, "True. So what’s this idea of yours?"

"Woolsey won’t let us start construction of the new satellite," John informed him, "but I was thinking we probably shouldn’t just start trying to make the new weapon without at least trying out making something from scratch. You know, just to make sure we really have some control over the process."

"So what?" Eyebrow rose over still hazy blue eyes. "You want to make a new Xbox or something?"

Sheppard knew he’d never get Rodney out of bed for something like that, but there was something that might work. "I was thinking more along the lines of a ZPM."

"A ZedPM?" McKay demanded in shock, all sign of sleep disappearing.

John stood and began pacing as he spoke. "Why not? Think of how much that would help us and hundreds of other planets here in Pegasus. Or how it would help Earth with its defenses. Or to power the Daedalus and cut the trip back from Earth down to a few days."

"Yes, it would be great, but building a ZedPM isn’t an easy undertaking. I mean, sure we could possibly use the chairs to perfect the crystalline structure necessary to decrease the rate of natural entropy and maintain the vacuum, but it still doesn’t solve the problem with how to capture and contain the subspace."

John cursed under his breath as he continued pacing trying to come up with something else they could try. "How about drones? Do you think we could make drones?"

McKay grimaced at the idea. "Sure you don’t want to just start with the Xbox?"

Sheppard rolled his eyes. "I’m serious, McKay."

"So am I." With a bewildered scowl, Rodney stood and shook his head. "What is up with you?"

"Nothing," John insisted, feeling the anxiety start to grow again.

"Waking me up in the middle of the night to go build ZedPMs and drones isn’t nothing." Rodney finally reached out and grabbed John’s arm to halt his back and forth path across the room. "John, what the hell is going on?"

At McKay’s touch, Sheppard stopped walking, and for a split second he thought he could feel that same connection they had in the chairs, then it was gone. And Jesus, all they had to do was go back to the chairs to have it again. He hadn’t realized he was breathing hard until he and Rodney had stood staring at each other for a long moment. Rodney’s eyes were circled in dark smears of exhaustion and his fingers trembled on John’s bicep, but all Sheppard could think about were the chairs and how good it felt to have that easy give and take flow so naturally between the two of them…how right it felt.

"Don’t you feel it, Rodney?" Gripping McKay’s arms in return he practically pleaded, "Don’t you feel like you need to be doing this? Like we need to be doing this?"

Rodney was breathing as heavily as John, seemingly teetering between acquiescence and denial before he finally licked his lips and gave a quick nod. "The…uhm… the Asgard beaming technology… I have the schematics on my laptop. If we could integrate those into the Jumpers it would make extracting teams pinned down in the field…"

John didn’t wait for Rodney to finish his idea before he started out the door and down the hall with his hand still holding onto McKay’s arm. He didn’t need a reason, not really, not if it meant they would be back in the chairs.

* * * *

"John, what are you doing?" John didn’t have to open his eyes to see that Teyla was pissed. "Mr. Woolsey was very explicit that you were not to begin construction on the satellite…"

"Relax," Sheppard dismissed. "We’re not building the satellite." Reaching out with his mind again, John turned his attention back to McKay. "I don’t think that part is going to fit."

Rodney scoffed in his head. "You don’t get paid to think. If you did, you wouldn’t make enough money to afford all your hair gel. Just hook it up already."

"Then what are you building?" Teyla asked. "And how long have you been here?"

John figured she was checking out the holographic image floating above him even though he didn’t open his eyes to respond. "Well, as much as I might deserve it, I don’t get paid to stand around and look pretty." With a snort he reminded Rodney, "Besides, don’t forget I could have been in MENSA."

"Yeah, but oddly enough, you’re not in MENSA, and considering that I have yet to see the actual entrance exam results, I’m beginning to doubt the legitimacy of that claim. So, listen to the man with multiple PhDs and connect the parts."

"I’m telling you, McKay, it’s not going to…" Sheppard was cut off by a stream of images showing exactly how the components would slide together. "Ohhhh, I get it."

Sheppard could picture the blue eyes rolled at the admission. "MENSA my Canadian ass."

"John, answer me!" Teyla shook his shoulder.

John felt the anger rolling over him at yet another interruption. "Look, this doesn’t involve you, so I’d appreciate it if you would just back off."

Teyla’s frown just deepened and she raised her eyebrows. "This does involve me, Colonel Sheppard. It involves me because you are endangering a member of our team. Although the way you have been behaving lately, I am not even sure you remember you are on a team."

"Sheppard?" Rodney called warily. "What’s going on?"

"Teyla’s here. She wants us to stop."

"Rodney is fine," John insisted out loud, yet again. "He’s fine, I’m fine, and you don’t need to worry about anything else except minding your own business and letting us finish our work."

Before Teyla could say anything more, Ronon spoke through the radio, "Teyla, how’s Sheppard?"

"He’s fine," she informed the Satedan. "Stubborn but fine. Why? Is there a problem?"

"Is he in the chair?" Ronon asked.

"Yes, he is." Both her tone and her expression were disapproving.

"You better get down here, then. There’s something you need to see."

"I am on my way," she told Ronon with a worried scowl before turning back to Sheppard. "We are not finished with this conversation."

"That’s what you think," he mumbled to himself as soon as she was out the door. "Rodney, can you lock the doors to the room I’m in?"

"That shouldn’t be a problem," Rodney told him.

"Then do it. The less distractions we have, the sooner we’ll have an Asgard beam to play with."

Removing his radio from his ear, John settled back comfortably into the chair. Within seconds he and McKay were back to the designs and he was easily able to ignore the sound of Teyla and Ronon banging on the door moments later.

* * * *

Once he and Rodney fell into that same rhythm they had had before, the banter slowed and finally stopped all together until John couldn’t really distinguish where his thoughts left off and McKay’s began. Without the constant interruptions of Teyla and Ronon, they finished the Asgard beam in no time. The accomplishment dazzled Sheppard. They had made it on their own from a design that wasn’t even Ancient and that meant there really weren’t any limits to what they could do. With that hypothesis proven, John’s mind turned to all the things they could make that had no existing designs at all. Images flashed behind his closed eyes and Sheppard could already feel Rodney working through the calculations and the design sketches… communications devices that would form a miniature wormhole of their own and let them speak across the galaxy without the aid of the gate, food replicators that would feed starving worlds, cloning machines that would rebuild entire planets that had been destroyed by the Wraith eons before. That’s when the thought struck him; why just settle for clones?

The double helix floated enticingly before him, twirling perfectly in the void that existed between John and Rodney’s collective thoughts.

"What?" It was the first individual thought John had heard from Rodney in what seemed to be ages.

"We can do it, Rodney," John coaxed. "What’s to stop us? We can create a whole new life. We can populate all these empty worlds. We can beat the Wraith at their own goddamn game."

"We’re not gods, Sheppard," Rodney argued.

"Well, we sure the hell are more than glorified mechanics."

Because they could create life out of nothing, John could feel it in his bones that they could do it if they wanted. And if that wasn’t the definition of divinity then he didn’t know what the fuck was.

"John, I’m not so sure… we can’t just go around creating new life forms. I mean, what would the IOA say? They’ll kick us off of Atlantis for sure."

"Fuck the IOA. They’d have to find a way to stop of us first and we won’t let the happen." It was true. Nothing could stop them. Nothing.

"John…" McKay was holding something back, for the first time John could feel it, could hear it in the way he said Sheppard’s name and it was something along the lines of fear.

But they were too close to throw in the towel now. "We can make them resistant to feeding by the Wraith. We can arm them, give them ships…"

"I can’t. As much as I want… " Rodney’s frustration was obvious and so was his growing anxiety. "I just can’t."

"I won’t let anything happen to you, McKay. I swear it. You’re safe with me." For the first time since Sheppard had walked through the gate and into a sunken city he actually believed that. He’d finally found a way to keep Rodney from harm, to keep Teyla and Ronon and all of Atlantis out of danger. "I’ll keep you safe."

"I know you will," Rodney confirmed in resignation. "That’s why I’m going to do the same for you."

That’s when the lights went out, the chairs shut down, and Rodney was just… gone.

"Rodney?" John reached out with his mind and just came up against nothingness. "Rodney!" The next time he called, it was out loud to a darkened room as he crawled on the floor looking for his lost radio. "Rodney!" His voice was rough from disuse and he cleared his throat and tried again… and again… and again.

He was still screaming it when Ronon managed to pry the door open and Teyla dropped to the floor beside him to wrap her arms around him.

"John, you and Rodney are safe now. All will be well."

But Teyla wasn’t Rodney, her touch felt hollow and empty and her promises held nothing that John so desperately needed.

* * * *

"Ronon, I swear, if you let me up, let me see him, I won’t do anything to make things worse."

Teyla and Ronon had finally restrained John after multiple attempts to get at McKay. Teyla swore it was for Sheppard’s own good and for Rodney’s seeing as the scientist was still nonresponsive almost eight hours after McKay himself had managed to drain the ZPMs of all power from his chair.

Ronon simply crossed his arms and leaned back against the wall. "It’s not going to happen, Sheppard. Not until you’re thinking straight again or Atlantis reaches us."

John tugged on the restraints yet again, the muscles of his forearms straining against the leather straps. "There is nothing wrong with my thinking. So just untie me and let me see McKay."

"Why do you want to see him?"

The simplicity of Ronon’s question had John stammering. "Because… he’s unconscious. I should be there with him."

"Teyla’s taking care of him," Ronon justified.

"She… can’t." Sheppard struggled to come up with an explanation as to why he would be better at the job than Teyla. But how the hell could he get Ronon to understand that he knew what Rodney needed because he needed the same thing? He needed that connection again, that feeling that he and McKay could do any fucking thing they put their minds to. So he settled on repeating, "She might think she is but she can’t. Okay?"

"And how would you make him better? By putting him back in the chairs?" When Sheppard clamped his mouth shut to keep from saying that’s exactly what he wanted to do, Ronon shook his head. "Even if I let you out, you couldn’t use the chairs anymore."

"Rodney could fix them," John insisted, struggling harder against the restraints. "He could fix them and get us back to work."

Ronon snorted and shook his head. "Yeah, that’s what I thought you’d say."

"What we were doing is important work…"

Ronon took a step forward then and cut Sheppard off. "What you were doing nearly killed McKay.   You wanting to do that to him again is why you’re staying tied up. So stop struggling before you hurt yourself."

John ignored the warning and pulled harder. "We could destroy the Wraith…"

"You’re no better than the Wraith!" Ronon bellowed, leaning down into Sheppard’s face. "Teyla’s been reading in the database and found out what those chairs do. They were made for a long siege and McKay’s chair was meant to support the person in your chair. People were supposed to switch out but since he was the only one here that could use it, you were pretty much sucking his life out of him little by little.  He was barely conscious when you had him lock the doors and he was practically in a coma when he finally killed the power.  So, how does that make you any better than a Wraith?"

Sheppard shook his head in denial of the gut punch Ronon’s words had delivered. "No, that’s not true. He would have told me. Rodney would have told me if I was doing that to him."

"Sheppard, you haven’t listened to anything anyone has said to you since you first sat in that damn chair. Did you ever stop to think that maybe that’s why McKay finally turned them off and made sure you couldn’t turn them back on?"

The news just made John struggle harder. "No, I didn’t do that to him. I wouldn’t do that; you know I wouldn’t. Let me up, I need to see him. I need to see him, Ronon! Let me up!"

"Not yet," Ronon told him with a touch of sympathy as he turned and walked out of the room.

"Ronon!" John called desperately after his teammate, straining so hard he felt the leather bite into his skin. "Untie me! You son of a bitch, let me out! I need to see McKay! Ronon!"

But Ronon ignored the demands and the threats and just let John scream himself hoarse until he lay exhausted and panting and aching for Rodney to be back buzzing around in his head, until he was left wishing they had never come to this fucking planet in the first place.

* * * *

The touch of a cool cloth to his forehead had John opening his eyes and asking hopefully, "Rodney?"

In the dim light of the room he could see Teyla sitting by his bed and giving him a small smile. "He is resting comfortably. I believe he is out of danger now. He even woke for a few moments earlier."

John ached all over and he felt like his skin was on fire. Giving a cursory test of the restraints just to check if they were still in place, he felt the soft rub of gauze on his wrists against the leather.

"I trust you will not try to do more harm to yourself by fighting the bindings," Teyla noted when John looked at her questioningly before she dabbed the damp cloth against his neck.

Closing his eyes, John shook his head silently, even though he really did want to do just that. Maybe then this would all be over and he wouldn’t feel like utter shit anymore. Because it was obvious Teyla wasn’t going to let him see McKay, and Sheppard knew nothing would be better until he could see Rodney.

"I have been studying the Ancient database and I believe I have found what caused the problem and why the Ancestors stopped work here at this facility."

If he could have, John would have turned on his side away from her because, honestly, he didn’t care why he had done what he had. In the long run it didn’t matter. He’d nearly killed Rodney and that thought just wouldn’t let go of him. It was nearly as consuming as the chairs had been. But since he was still tied down, all he could do was keep his eyes closed and listen as Teyla continued to wipe the sweat from his fevered skin.

"There was a problem with the nanites that were used to construct the satellite. Some sort of feedback loop with the person occupying the chair. Perhaps Rodney will be able to understand it better once he is awake. But the end result is that the person in the control chair is compelled to continue to feed their need to build. It is almost the same sort of physiological response that a person addicted to the Wraith enzyme experiences."

He knew Teyla was only telling him this to give him a logical explanation for what he had done but it just felt like an excuse. John didn’t want excuses; he just wanted McKay.

"The Daedalus contacted us today with a long range transmission to the Jumper. They will arrive tomorrow with a crew from Atlantis. I am hopeful they will learn even more than I have been able to find in the logs."

Tomorrow? The last time Sheppard had checked in with Atlantis, the ship was still about five days out. Which begged the question how long had he kept Rodney trapped in that chair? And how long had they been recovering? And how long was it going to take before he stopped missing that connection with McKay?

"John, did you understand what I have told you?"

John finally opened his eyes again and could see what had been in Teyla’s expression since they first started using the chairs… worry, concern, caring, and even a bit of her own exhaustion. "I’m sorry," he managed to say in little more than a whisper.

"You were not yourself these past several days," she dismissed. "There is no need to apologize."

"Yes there is," he insisted.

"Perhaps you are right, but I am not the one who needs to hear it."

"Then let me tell him," John pleaded softly.

Teyla hesitated, weighing her options, no doubt weighing John’s sanity before finally relenting. "Very well. Ronon and I will take you to him."

* * * *

The room where Rodney was sleeping was as dimly lit as the one where they had been holding John. Seeing as McKay had literally blown the fuses in the Ancient facility, they were limited to lighting the place with lamps provided by the locals. But even in the low light, Sheppard could see how pale McKay still looked. Rodney was curled on his side, one hand resting near his chin on the pillow and the other hanging partially off the bed. It appeared that Teyla had had Rodney hooked up to an I.V. given the medical supplies from kit from the Jumper and the band aid on the back of McKay’s hand. Sheppard was once again amazed at what their Athosian teammate had taken the time to learn since her arrival in Atlantis. He could only imagine that Rodney had been dehydrated and his blood sugar had no doubt plummeted. After all, John couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a real meal that Teyla or Ronon hadn’t spoon fed him while he was restrained. Still, even having to see Rodney in this condition went a long way in making Sheppard feel better by just be in the same room with him.

Sheppard had spent a good deal of his life trying not to get too close to people. In a lot of ways, it was easier because when they left… and one way or another, they always left… there were no lingering regrets to bog him down. But then he’d come to Atlantis and the world as he’d known it had changed and John found himself changing right along with it. He’d let people in, formed bonds deeper than any he’d ever formed before, even with his own flesh and blood, and he'd been willing to die for them without a second thought. And if he were honest with himself, the person he’d connected with the easiest was the one he never should have befriended in the first place. Teyla had been simple; she was genuine and honest and real to her very core. Elizabeth had been a lot like him in the beginning, just struggling to hold on to some semblance of control in a ridiculously out of control situation. Carson was the kind of guy you couldn’t help but like. Ronon shared a common spirit of a soldier fighting for redemption. But McKay was… hell, he was everything Sheppard wasn’t and somehow that made him fit perfectly into John’s life, like they were adjacent puzzle piece that slipped seamlessly together to complete the picture of John’s existence. As much as he liked to pretend McKay was just a pal, the truth was that, even before they’d shared the connection through the chairs, Rodney had become such an integral part of Sheppard’s world he literally couldn’t imagine it without McKay. But after the link they’d shared during their time in the facility, finally seeing Rodney again had John realizing he could take a breath without his chest aching with a feeling akin to homesickness.

His two healthy teammates stayed by the door, at least allowing him the pretense of a bit of privacy as he crossed the short distance to McKay’s bed. If they’d been back on Atlantis in the infirmary, John knew there would have been monitors in place and the sound of a stable heartbeat to reassure him that Rodney was really okay. As it was, he could only watch the way Rodney’s chest rose and fell steadily as he slept.

Now that he was here where he had been begging to be brought for so long, Sheppard found himself hesitant to move any closer. When he looked back and Teyla nodded encouragingly, he took a seat beside McKay’s bed.

"Hey," John told the sleeping form, lowering his voice when Rodney flinched in his sleep so that he didn’t wake McKay. As much as he wanted Rodney to be awake, to tell John that he was okay, John knew that would be selfish when what Rodney really needed was rest. And John was sick to death of being selfish. "I just wanted you to know that I… uh… I fucked up. Big time. I know that now and you were right to shut down the chairs, and if you want to hold it over my head when you wake up, I’ll understand why."

Reaching out a tentative hand, he patted lightly on Rodney’s arm dangling off the bed. That’s all he had intended, just one little pat then a quick retreat back into his own personal space. But the feel of McKay’s skin against his held the memory of the connection they had shared, and he found his hand wrapping around Rodney’s forearm and refusing to let go. It also had Rodney blinking his eyes open and regarding John with an intensity that belied McKay’s sleepy demeanor and had Sheppard feeling like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar and his stomach twisting at how Rodney would react to him being there. Because there was no way McKay could want him anywhere near him after what John had done.

"You okay?" Rodney asked, twisting his wrist so that he could grip John’s arm in return.

The touch had Sheppard fighting the constriction in his throat at the relief he felt. "You stupid son of a bitch," he managed to choke out before dropping his head to the mattress so that he wouldn't lose it completely. "Why didn’t you let me know what was happening to you?"

"Because I liked it as much as you did," Rodney admitted quietly as his other hand came to rest on the back of John’s neck.  Sheppard knew it was the connection he was talking about and that McKay’s touch was his way of trying to restore it the same at John. "I miss it, too."

Neither seemed to care that Teyla and Ronon were watching them, because it didn’t matter. They might not understand the absolute need he and McKay had to be in contact, but John knew they’d respect it for what it was. When Rodney tugged on his arm to signal him closer, John gave in almost helplessly. It wasn’t exactly the same silent communication they had shared before, but John wasn’t about to quibble over details and miss out on the opportunity to feel normal again.

Sheppard moved forward to rest his forehead against Rodney’s chest and exhaled heavily. "Jesus, I’m sorry, McKay. I’m so goddamn sorry."

McKay’s hand slid effortlessly around John’s shoulders to hold him even tighter and he snorted hoarsely into the top of Sheppard’s head. "You better fucking believe you’re sorry."

John barked a coarse laugh against McKay’s chest, twisted his fist into Rodney’s shirt, soaked in Rodney’s warmth, felt the way Rodney was trembling in relief as much as he was himself. This wasn’t the same thing they had had before, he couldn’t read Rodney’s mind, he couldn’t sense McKay nestled comfortably in his thoughts, couldn’t feel Rodney taking his burden… more of a burden than Rodney could have or even should have tried to take onto his shoulders. But here in the grasp of Rodney’s arms it was close, damn close, which was good seeing as it was as close as they were going to get any time soon. No, this wasn’t the same thing they’d had in the chairs, not by a long shot. But it was pretty damn good in its own right.

And for now, it was going to have to be enough.

The End