So Many Idiots, So Little Time by itsuki9 (Doppelganger Challenge)
Title: So many idiots, so little time
Author: itsuki9
Pairing: Sheppard/McKay
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None.
Word Count: 1340
She chose that day of all days to take the shortcut through the Northeast wing. The door she paused outside of had opened up on its own as she approached.
"Teyla--" That was John, a warning in his tone.
"Teyla! What're you doing here?" Rodney asked around the same time, a breathless cadence to his voice.
She turned around immediately and willed the door to close, close, please close on her way out. They needed to start using the crystal locks in this wing.
Looking back, she should have noticed that those two were glowing perhaps a bit too brightly for any type of physical activity, and that although both of them were bare-chested and sweating like Athosian boys sprinting in the sun-drenched fields, she was the only one blushing.
*
The first sign was that Colonel Sheppard stopped looking desperately bored at meetings. Or when he talked to Colonel Caldwell, or during his daily check-ins with Stargate Control.
He was still bored, but the boredom now seemed manageable. In fact, while even Elizabeth started to look worn out by the end of their second meeting that week, John still seemed rested and calm.
The scientists, on the other hand, concealed the event in their usual fashion--which was to say, not at all.
Teyla counted between three to five Dr. McKays in the lab shortly after lunch-time. She stood there, wide-eyed, as two of them argued over the Ancient controls while a third boiled a new batch of coffee in a beaker. None of the other scientists seemed to think this was a big deal.
"Don't tell Elizabeth," Rodney said.
"Hi. Teyla. Please don't tell Elizabeth," another one said. This one was wearing an old science team uniform ripped at the shoulders.
"Teyla--"
"I understand, Dr. McKay: don't tell Elizabeth."
*
"Oh," Elizabeth said softly, rubbing at her forehead then pressing her face into her palms. "I think I'm either losing my mind, or there really are copies of all of you running loose in Atlantis."
Teyla smiled and reached across the desk to feel her forehead with the back of her fingers. Her skin felt a bit warm to the touch.
"You're not losing your mind, Elizabeth. And I assure you that you're talking to--" What was the phrase? "... 'the real thing.' I'm the only one of myself I've seen." That wasn't a lie.
Elizabeth made a hmm sound and gave her a sharp look.
"Something I should know about?"
*
Teyla was heading for the mess hall but took a transporter to the lab at the last minute. Even though she hadn't given them up, somebody should warn the scientists. Not that she would recommend they cover up a potential technological disaster from Elizabeth, but it was a madhouse in there and the least they could do was ... well, clean things up. Elizabeth's headache was at risk of becoming a permanent condition.
It was even crazier there, the second time around.
A strange thing had happened. The Colonel's doppelgangers (Doug, Flutie, and Gerry), who had been efficiently and seamlessly attending meetings, submitting reports and even trying to beat her at sticks--they've all moved into the lab, where the clones of Dr. McKay were working hard and complaining harder.
Rodney, the one with healed scars on his skin, sweat on his forehead, and the nastiest temper out of them all, said, "Pass me the ..." and finished his command by snapping his fingers. Yes, she was pretty sure he was who he appeared to be.
One of the doppelgangers--Flutie,, she guessed--placed the power meter in the outstretched hand though his eyes never left the folders in his lap. He asked, in a voice as easy and relaxed as John's, "What do you think about the updated projections--"
"Way off the mark," Rodney interrupted, sliding back down to somewhere below the console. "Tell Zelenka that just because he's a senior scientist doesn't mean I won't fire him."
"I can hear you, you know," Zelenka's muffled voice drifted over from several lab benches down. He cursed freely in Czech as he informed one of the other Dr. McKays that they were being too greedy, at which point two of them double-teamed Zelenka and accused him of pettiness and jealousy.
"Socket wrench?" Rodney's grubby palm was outstretched once more. His face, partially obscured by his magnifying goggles, seemed pale when it appeared from under the system to check what the hold up was.
"You mean the box wrench. You need that to get in there to do what you're planning to do." The papers scattered to the ground, forgotten, and Flutie-with-the-ruffled-hair was now squeezing under the console, pointing at the narrow ridge Rodney was working on.
"Oh. Right." Pause. "Wasn't that what I said?"
Teyla became aware of someone else beside her, observing the chaos in the lab. John--the real John, faint scar on his neck and more on his arms, never ease but tension in his limbs--remained in the hallway, oddly quiet.
Elizabeth's fury exploded before dinner time. According to Dr. Zelenka, one of the scientists had cracked under pressure and given up all the details. Items from the room in the Northeast wing were confiscated by 1900, and Elizabeth herself made an appearance in the lab by 1930 to warn them this was no joking matter.
Heads should have rolled, except there had been nothing for her to pick on. The science team was making excellent progress on their projects, the Colonel's paperwork was on-time for once, and the Fluties and Gerrys, as well as Dr. McKays One through Five were nowhere in sight. Somebody had gotten rid of the evidence. And mopped the floor while at it.
John was sullen and tight-lipped, and Rodney seemed as if there were words hanging at the tip of his tongue. The scientists were surprisingly well-behaved, as if they, too, felt the sudden low pressure.
John still attended meetings while the Marines continued repairing damage to the city. As long as nobody from SGC was being a complete ass, he never had much to add, and Elizabeth didn't push. To her, sometimes his presence alone was enough.
This carried on for weeks, until one day Teyla came looking for her missing student and found a doppelganger of Colonel Sheppard in the lab again, "just helping out" (the way all three of them had during the fiasco.) A sparring session apparently held less interest to any of them than watching Rodney blow up things.
She was about to remind them this was a bad idea when she noticed the scars in all the right places on John's neck and tanned arms as he hunched over the lab bench, head lowered in concentration next to Rodney's. They were sitting so close. Rodney was talking quietly, for once.
When one of the half-asleep scientists told John to brew a new beaker of coffee (a demand Rodney had easily made a hundred times before), John's glare was meaner than all the McKay doppelgangers combined. It said, I might not be your boss, but I can still fire you.
John, whom she thought gave a convincing impression of never faltering under the weight of his responsibilities, had been drawing closed circles around where he stood, on his touch-worn map of Atlantis. The scientists, the Athosians, Elizabeth--his footprints had always remained within self-imposed boundaries, and now he had crossed one of them. He was still on edge, poised to deal with any challenge, because John had a hard time believing that nobody took issue with him spending what little of his free time in the labs. The hush and the tension he picked up on, that made him slouch painfully, more deliberately, in the hard chairs--
"Is not because you are military commander," Zelenka murmured as he left the lab for the night. The door slid closed behind him.
"Obviously. It's because scientists are a neurotic bunch on any day," Rodney was saying, just as the door opened again. Teyla blinked in surprise and pushed off from the wall she'd been leaning against. In came Zelenka, showered, shaved, and in a clean set of clothes, making some tired-sounding noise of agreement.
Life on Atlantis shifted gears back to the usual level of crazy.
End.
Author: itsuki9
Pairing: Sheppard/McKay
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None.
Word Count: 1340
She chose that day of all days to take the shortcut through the Northeast wing. The door she paused outside of had opened up on its own as she approached.
"Teyla--" That was John, a warning in his tone.
"Teyla! What're you doing here?" Rodney asked around the same time, a breathless cadence to his voice.
She turned around immediately and willed the door to close, close, please close on her way out. They needed to start using the crystal locks in this wing.
Looking back, she should have noticed that those two were glowing perhaps a bit too brightly for any type of physical activity, and that although both of them were bare-chested and sweating like Athosian boys sprinting in the sun-drenched fields, she was the only one blushing.
*
The first sign was that Colonel Sheppard stopped looking desperately bored at meetings. Or when he talked to Colonel Caldwell, or during his daily check-ins with Stargate Control.
He was still bored, but the boredom now seemed manageable. In fact, while even Elizabeth started to look worn out by the end of their second meeting that week, John still seemed rested and calm.
The scientists, on the other hand, concealed the event in their usual fashion--which was to say, not at all.
Teyla counted between three to five Dr. McKays in the lab shortly after lunch-time. She stood there, wide-eyed, as two of them argued over the Ancient controls while a third boiled a new batch of coffee in a beaker. None of the other scientists seemed to think this was a big deal.
"Don't tell Elizabeth," Rodney said.
"Hi. Teyla. Please don't tell Elizabeth," another one said. This one was wearing an old science team uniform ripped at the shoulders.
"Teyla--"
"I understand, Dr. McKay: don't tell Elizabeth."
*
"Oh," Elizabeth said softly, rubbing at her forehead then pressing her face into her palms. "I think I'm either losing my mind, or there really are copies of all of you running loose in Atlantis."
Teyla smiled and reached across the desk to feel her forehead with the back of her fingers. Her skin felt a bit warm to the touch.
"You're not losing your mind, Elizabeth. And I assure you that you're talking to--" What was the phrase? "... 'the real thing.' I'm the only one of myself I've seen." That wasn't a lie.
Elizabeth made a hmm sound and gave her a sharp look.
"Something I should know about?"
*
Teyla was heading for the mess hall but took a transporter to the lab at the last minute. Even though she hadn't given them up, somebody should warn the scientists. Not that she would recommend they cover up a potential technological disaster from Elizabeth, but it was a madhouse in there and the least they could do was ... well, clean things up. Elizabeth's headache was at risk of becoming a permanent condition.
It was even crazier there, the second time around.
A strange thing had happened. The Colonel's doppelgangers (Doug, Flutie, and Gerry), who had been efficiently and seamlessly attending meetings, submitting reports and even trying to beat her at sticks--they've all moved into the lab, where the clones of Dr. McKay were working hard and complaining harder.
Rodney, the one with healed scars on his skin, sweat on his forehead, and the nastiest temper out of them all, said, "Pass me the ..." and finished his command by snapping his fingers. Yes, she was pretty sure he was who he appeared to be.
One of the doppelgangers--Flutie,, she guessed--placed the power meter in the outstretched hand though his eyes never left the folders in his lap. He asked, in a voice as easy and relaxed as John's, "What do you think about the updated projections--"
"Way off the mark," Rodney interrupted, sliding back down to somewhere below the console. "Tell Zelenka that just because he's a senior scientist doesn't mean I won't fire him."
"I can hear you, you know," Zelenka's muffled voice drifted over from several lab benches down. He cursed freely in Czech as he informed one of the other Dr. McKays that they were being too greedy, at which point two of them double-teamed Zelenka and accused him of pettiness and jealousy.
"Socket wrench?" Rodney's grubby palm was outstretched once more. His face, partially obscured by his magnifying goggles, seemed pale when it appeared from under the system to check what the hold up was.
"You mean the box wrench. You need that to get in there to do what you're planning to do." The papers scattered to the ground, forgotten, and Flutie-with-the-ruffled-hair was now squeezing under the console, pointing at the narrow ridge Rodney was working on.
"Oh. Right." Pause. "Wasn't that what I said?"
Teyla became aware of someone else beside her, observing the chaos in the lab. John--the real John, faint scar on his neck and more on his arms, never ease but tension in his limbs--remained in the hallway, oddly quiet.
Elizabeth's fury exploded before dinner time. According to Dr. Zelenka, one of the scientists had cracked under pressure and given up all the details. Items from the room in the Northeast wing were confiscated by 1900, and Elizabeth herself made an appearance in the lab by 1930 to warn them this was no joking matter.
Heads should have rolled, except there had been nothing for her to pick on. The science team was making excellent progress on their projects, the Colonel's paperwork was on-time for once, and the Fluties and Gerrys, as well as Dr. McKays One through Five were nowhere in sight. Somebody had gotten rid of the evidence. And mopped the floor while at it.
John was sullen and tight-lipped, and Rodney seemed as if there were words hanging at the tip of his tongue. The scientists were surprisingly well-behaved, as if they, too, felt the sudden low pressure.
John still attended meetings while the Marines continued repairing damage to the city. As long as nobody from SGC was being a complete ass, he never had much to add, and Elizabeth didn't push. To her, sometimes his presence alone was enough.
This carried on for weeks, until one day Teyla came looking for her missing student and found a doppelganger of Colonel Sheppard in the lab again, "just helping out" (the way all three of them had during the fiasco.) A sparring session apparently held less interest to any of them than watching Rodney blow up things.
She was about to remind them this was a bad idea when she noticed the scars in all the right places on John's neck and tanned arms as he hunched over the lab bench, head lowered in concentration next to Rodney's. They were sitting so close. Rodney was talking quietly, for once.
When one of the half-asleep scientists told John to brew a new beaker of coffee (a demand Rodney had easily made a hundred times before), John's glare was meaner than all the McKay doppelgangers combined. It said, I might not be your boss, but I can still fire you.
John, whom she thought gave a convincing impression of never faltering under the weight of his responsibilities, had been drawing closed circles around where he stood, on his touch-worn map of Atlantis. The scientists, the Athosians, Elizabeth--his footprints had always remained within self-imposed boundaries, and now he had crossed one of them. He was still on edge, poised to deal with any challenge, because John had a hard time believing that nobody took issue with him spending what little of his free time in the labs. The hush and the tension he picked up on, that made him slouch painfully, more deliberately, in the hard chairs--
"Is not because you are military commander," Zelenka murmured as he left the lab for the night. The door slid closed behind him.
"Obviously. It's because scientists are a neurotic bunch on any day," Rodney was saying, just as the door opened again. Teyla blinked in surprise and pushed off from the wall she'd been leaning against. In came Zelenka, showered, shaved, and in a clean set of clothes, making some tired-sounding noise of agreement.
Life on Atlantis shifted gears back to the usual level of crazy.
End.