Fic: The Planet Of Kyre Banorg, by Ifylla
Title: The Planet of Kyre Banorg
Author: Ifylla
Wordcount: 311
Rating: G.
Pairings: None.
Warnings: Crackfic!
Notes: I do not own Stargate Atlantis, or Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and there is not a day that goes by that I do not regret it.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“Hey, at least it's not Planet of the Apes,” John not-so-gently shoves Rodney to the ground and shoots the rabbit-like creature several times. There is shouting and panicking, and Ronon is just standing there, firing random blasts at ever furry white creature as it bares its teeth and rushes them.
From the moment they passed through the Stargate, it had been one rabbit after the other, blood in its fangs, leaping high off the ground and launching at the closest person, ripping their throat out. They've already lost one scientist, they won't lose any more.
“I don't think our weapons are doing much,” Ronon growls, kicks at two rodents and shoots a third.
There are hundreds of them, a huge fluffy amoeba of vicious rabbits, and despite all the fear and death and gunfire, John can't help but laugh.
“John? What is so funny?” Teyla hits away two rabbits like baseballs, a stick in either hand. There are tears streaming from his eyes, and he is having trouble seeing straight enough to shoot.
“It's just- I wish we had a-a- Holy Hand Grenade!” He doubles over in laughter, uncontrollable, and a rabbit launches straight over him.
“A what?” They have started walking backwards, towards the Stargate, firing/smacking/kicking all the way. Rodney snorts, cowers behind them.
“I'll explain- later,” John bites his lip, keeps shooting, tears streaming down his cheeks.
And later, Elizabeth asks them what happened, and John with difficulty, curves his fingers like teeth, like jaws, and tells her that “death awaits us with nasty big pointy teeth”, and then promptly folds into tearful guffaws on the meeting room floor.
The only words they were able to extract from him were “The most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodents we've ever set our eyes on.”
Author: Ifylla
Wordcount: 311
Rating: G.
Pairings: None.
Warnings: Crackfic!
Notes: I do not own Stargate Atlantis, or Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and there is not a day that goes by that I do not regret it.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“Hey, at least it's not Planet of the Apes,” John not-so-gently shoves Rodney to the ground and shoots the rabbit-like creature several times. There is shouting and panicking, and Ronon is just standing there, firing random blasts at ever furry white creature as it bares its teeth and rushes them.
From the moment they passed through the Stargate, it had been one rabbit after the other, blood in its fangs, leaping high off the ground and launching at the closest person, ripping their throat out. They've already lost one scientist, they won't lose any more.
“I don't think our weapons are doing much,” Ronon growls, kicks at two rodents and shoots a third.
There are hundreds of them, a huge fluffy amoeba of vicious rabbits, and despite all the fear and death and gunfire, John can't help but laugh.
“John? What is so funny?” Teyla hits away two rabbits like baseballs, a stick in either hand. There are tears streaming from his eyes, and he is having trouble seeing straight enough to shoot.
“It's just- I wish we had a-a- Holy Hand Grenade!” He doubles over in laughter, uncontrollable, and a rabbit launches straight over him.
“A what?” They have started walking backwards, towards the Stargate, firing/smacking/kicking all the way. Rodney snorts, cowers behind them.
“I'll explain- later,” John bites his lip, keeps shooting, tears streaming down his cheeks.
And later, Elizabeth asks them what happened, and John with difficulty, curves his fingers like teeth, like jaws, and tells her that “death awaits us with nasty big pointy teeth”, and then promptly folds into tearful guffaws on the meeting room floor.
The only words they were able to extract from him were “The most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodents we've ever set our eyes on.”