1)The Joy of Sex and The Kama Sutra, from Barnes & Noble.
The bookstore was one of the first places Daniel took her off base. He thought that it was a good place to start, since he could leave her in the Erotica aisle and go check out the latest fictions in the Archaeology section.
And it did start out smoothly…Vala grabbed a stack of reading material and plopped to the floor. She looked interested enough, and Daniel didn’t want to give the plain-clothed SF’s that were inconspicuously tailing them that much ammo about how much time he spent with the alien chick in the sex aisle. So, he went and found those two books and set them down beside her.
“Here,” he said. “Lots of pictures.”
Vala smiled, but was otherwise saucer-eyed and quiet, so Daniel walked off, pretty damn pleased with himself.
Things went downhill when they tried to leave about an hour later. Right as they were about to pass through the exit, one of the SF’s shot forward and grabbed Vala by the arms.
“Ow,” Vala protested, trying to pull away. “Hey!”
Daniel recognized the beginnings for a very loud conversation and it would have broken his heart to be banned from the Barnes & Noble. Quickly, he moved between Vala and the SF’s, closing his fingertips around each of her shoulders.
“Guys? What’s going on?” He tried to ignore the way Vala’s face lit up and she started squirming against him.
“She has merchandise under her shirt,” said one of the SFs, pointing at Vala’s chest.
“I do not!” Vala protested.
“Shhh,” Daniel pleaded.
“These are all me,” she said arching her back into Daniel’s torso.
“Vala,” Daniel said, keeping his voice down. “What do you have under your shirt?”
“Just me.” She tilted her head back to look at him and showed him lying, white teeth.
“Vala.”
“If you don’t believe me, you’re welcome to check.” And she was squirming again.
“Sir -“ the SF started.
“No,” Vala said. “Not you. I want Daniel to search me.”
People were starting to stare, and at this rate, Daniel was getting banned and Vala would never be allowed off base again. He considered making that threat for a second - but then he thought better of it. Threats didn’t really work on Vala.
“Look,” he said. “I will buy whatever it is that you want. You don’t have to steal it and you don’t have to cause a scene.”
And maybe he sounded desperate, because Vala abruptly lifted the hem of her sweater and the two heavy paperbacks tumbled to the floor. Quickly, Daniel scooped them up and made a beeline for the register. Hefting them on to the counter, he paused long enough to wonder how Vala had hid them.
That was how Vala came to own her very first possessions from Earth. Daniel didn’t get banned from the bookstore, but in the car ride home, Vala started naming positions from the Kama Sutra and asking which ones he and the SFs had tried.
The bookstore was one of the first places Daniel took her off base. He thought that it was a good place to start, since he could leave her in the Erotica aisle and go check out the latest fictions in the Archaeology section.
And it did start out smoothly…Vala grabbed a stack of reading material and plopped to the floor. She looked interested enough, and Daniel didn’t want to give the plain-clothed SF’s that were inconspicuously tailing them that much ammo about how much time he spent with the alien chick in the sex aisle. So, he went and found those two books and set them down beside her.
“Here,” he said. “Lots of pictures.”
Vala smiled, but was otherwise saucer-eyed and quiet, so Daniel walked off, pretty damn pleased with himself.
Things went downhill when they tried to leave about an hour later. Right as they were about to pass through the exit, one of the SF’s shot forward and grabbed Vala by the arms.
“Ow,” Vala protested, trying to pull away. “Hey!”
Daniel recognized the beginnings for a very loud conversation and it would have broken his heart to be banned from the Barnes & Noble. Quickly, he moved between Vala and the SF’s, closing his fingertips around each of her shoulders.
“Guys? What’s going on?” He tried to ignore the way Vala’s face lit up and she started squirming against him.
“She has merchandise under her shirt,” said one of the SFs, pointing at Vala’s chest.
“I do not!” Vala protested.
“Shhh,” Daniel pleaded.
“These are all me,” she said arching her back into Daniel’s torso.
“Vala,” Daniel said, keeping his voice down. “What do you have under your shirt?”
“Just me.” She tilted her head back to look at him and showed him lying, white teeth.
“Vala.”
“If you don’t believe me, you’re welcome to check.” And she was squirming again.
“Sir -“ the SF started.
“No,” Vala said. “Not you. I want Daniel to search me.”
People were starting to stare, and at this rate, Daniel was getting banned and Vala would never be allowed off base again. He considered making that threat for a second - but then he thought better of it. Threats didn’t really work on Vala.
“Look,” he said. “I will buy whatever it is that you want. You don’t have to steal it and you don’t have to cause a scene.”
And maybe he sounded desperate, because Vala abruptly lifted the hem of her sweater and the two heavy paperbacks tumbled to the floor. Quickly, Daniel scooped them up and made a beeline for the register. Hefting them on to the counter, he paused long enough to wonder how Vala had hid them.
That was how Vala came to own her very first possessions from Earth. Daniel didn’t get banned from the bookstore, but in the car ride home, Vala started naming positions from the Kama Sutra and asking which ones he and the SFs had tried.
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