Looking Up (or when Santana finally got her shit together)
Title: Looking Up (1/3)
Pairing: Santana/Brittany (primarily)
Rating: PG-13 for now
Summary: Santana and Brittany are undeniable. But so is the fact that they live in Lima, Ohio.
Title: Looking Up (1/3)
Pairing: Santana/Brittany (primarily)
Rating: PG-13 for now
Summary: Santana and Brittany are undeniable. But so is the fact that they live in Lima, Ohio.
Santana is certain of many things. She knows that she is going to leave Lima and Ohio far, far behind her. She knows that the Cheerios are merely a tool, if she can utilize them to stay at the top of the social pyramid of WMHS, then she can escape this stupid little life without too many scars (she ignores the fact that she is the one currently inflicting the scars). She knows that being the head of the Cheerios, being on the track team, being at the top of her advanced classes, and being in as many clubs as she is, she’s a shoe-in for a bunch of scholarships.
She can string along as many boys as she wants. They’re at the top of the school’s social ladder but they are all completely meaningless. She feels nothing when they touch her and when they kiss her all Santana can focus on is how they will help put her above the other girls and how long she has to let them hang around her before she can throw them to the side. Everyone in her life is meant to be used and left behind when they can offer her nothing else. Boys help to cultivate her ruthless image.
There’s only one problem.
She doesn’t want any of them. The one person she wants does not fit into her plan of escaping Lima unscathed.
Santana doesn’t want Brittany to use her. Santana wants Brittany because she wants to know every curve and line of the other girl. She wants to discover every part of her and conquer it. She wants Brittany for no other reason than the fact that she cares about her, maybe even... But conquerors are not afforded the luxury of caring.
At least, that’s what she tells herself.
The only time that Brittany has ever been absolutely certain about anything is when she feels music moving through her body. Rachel Berry sings the way that Brittany moves. It is as though in that moment, there is nothing but the act of music, making it real, making it physical. Brittany wants to dance forever.
There are many things that Brittany is uncertain about. School comes to mind, but even though her teachers have always told her that her education is the only way to go anywhere, she feels something inside of her that tells her differently. How can school provide a future if she’s just no good at it? Brittany knows that she’s going to dance into her future, no matter how many mean math teachers tell her that she’s being unrealistic.
But popularity, that’s another thing that Brittany is confused by. It just happened when she moved to Lima from an even smaller town in Michigan. She never tried to be popular; Sue Sylvester had seen her dance at a ballet recital in the summer before seventh grade. Before she had even made any friends, her parents had enrolled her into Sue Sylvester’s Camp for Preteen Performers. Most people called it the Cheerios Manufacturing Plant.
That was where she met Quinn. More importantly it’s where she met Santana.
If there’s anything else that Brittany knows, it’s that she loves Santana. If there’s anything that Brittany is confused by, it’s why she can’t lean over and kiss Santana in the middle of the hall. But Santana says that they can’t and Santana knows these things.
When they’re alone in the mirrored rehearsal room, Santana will watch Brittany dance. She gets this look in her eye and Brittany feels her love in the same way that she feels the music roll through every nerve in her body. She dances and makes music tangible; when they’re alone with only their reflections for company, they make their love real. She reaches out and Santana will take her hand and pull her close like in salsa dancing, except the only spinning that happens is when their lips meet and their bodies press together close enough that Brittany can feel Santana’s heart beating against her own chest.
Brittany knows by her heartbeat that something about them scares Santana. But she knows that when she’s dancing into her future, she wants Santana to be dancing next to her.
~*~
Fuck.
That’s the only though running through Santana’s head as she watches Brittany back away from her with wide, hurt, blue eyes. The look on the blonde’s face cracks something deep inside the other girl.
“Britt,” she pleads, reaching out the way she’s done a million times before.
Brittany does not take her hand.
Instead the blonde cheerleader does an about-face and flees from the kitchen that they’ve been occupying to get away from the rowdy party going on outside. She clips the entering Quinn’s shoulder as she tries to escape.
“Woah, Brittany! What’s wr-” But she’s gone before Quinn can finish.
Santana’s eyes follow her out into the large group of jocks and Cheerios until she is lost in the crowd.
“What the hell did you do?”
Her eyes snap back find Quinn with an expression that expects answers. She sneers instead of confiding.
“Mind your own fucking business, Juno.”
She tries to walk past the other girl and attempts not to reveal the fact that her eyes are scanning the crowd once again. A solid grip on her wrist tugs her back into place and she’s looking into hazel eyes when she wants to be downing ten shots of tequila to forget what just happened.
“She’s not going to wait around for you forever.” Quinn whispers softly.
Santana wants to say something, to make some snide comment, but she can’t. Instead she breaks eye contact and physical contact with Quinn.
Run. Find her. Tell her you’re sorry. Don’t let her go. Make her stop hurting.
Instead of doing any of the things that her mind and heart are screaming at her, she turns and walks toward the kegs and the boys handing out frothing cups to the Cheerios around them. She can feel as Quinn looks on with disappointment. She ignores it.
Fan
Pairing: Santana/Brittany (primarily)
Rating: PG-13 for now
Summary: Santana and Brittany are undeniable. But so is the fact that they live in Lima, Ohio.
Title: Looking Up (1/3)
Pairing: Santana/Brittany (primarily)
Rating: PG-13 for now
Summary: Santana and Brittany are undeniable. But so is the fact that they live in Lima, Ohio.
Santana is certain of many things. She knows that she is going to leave Lima and Ohio far, far behind her. She knows that the Cheerios are merely a tool, if she can utilize them to stay at the top of the social pyramid of WMHS, then she can escape this stupid little life without too many scars (she ignores the fact that she is the one currently inflicting the scars). She knows that being the head of the Cheerios, being on the track team, being at the top of her advanced classes, and being in as many clubs as she is, she’s a shoe-in for a bunch of scholarships.
She can string along as many boys as she wants. They’re at the top of the school’s social ladder but they are all completely meaningless. She feels nothing when they touch her and when they kiss her all Santana can focus on is how they will help put her above the other girls and how long she has to let them hang around her before she can throw them to the side. Everyone in her life is meant to be used and left behind when they can offer her nothing else. Boys help to cultivate her ruthless image.
There’s only one problem.
She doesn’t want any of them. The one person she wants does not fit into her plan of escaping Lima unscathed.
Santana doesn’t want Brittany to use her. Santana wants Brittany because she wants to know every curve and line of the other girl. She wants to discover every part of her and conquer it. She wants Brittany for no other reason than the fact that she cares about her, maybe even... But conquerors are not afforded the luxury of caring.
At least, that’s what she tells herself.
The only time that Brittany has ever been absolutely certain about anything is when she feels music moving through her body. Rachel Berry sings the way that Brittany moves. It is as though in that moment, there is nothing but the act of music, making it real, making it physical. Brittany wants to dance forever.
There are many things that Brittany is uncertain about. School comes to mind, but even though her teachers have always told her that her education is the only way to go anywhere, she feels something inside of her that tells her differently. How can school provide a future if she’s just no good at it? Brittany knows that she’s going to dance into her future, no matter how many mean math teachers tell her that she’s being unrealistic.
But popularity, that’s another thing that Brittany is confused by. It just happened when she moved to Lima from an even smaller town in Michigan. She never tried to be popular; Sue Sylvester had seen her dance at a ballet recital in the summer before seventh grade. Before she had even made any friends, her parents had enrolled her into Sue Sylvester’s Camp for Preteen Performers. Most people called it the Cheerios Manufacturing Plant.
That was where she met Quinn. More importantly it’s where she met Santana.
If there’s anything else that Brittany knows, it’s that she loves Santana. If there’s anything that Brittany is confused by, it’s why she can’t lean over and kiss Santana in the middle of the hall. But Santana says that they can’t and Santana knows these things.
When they’re alone in the mirrored rehearsal room, Santana will watch Brittany dance. She gets this look in her eye and Brittany feels her love in the same way that she feels the music roll through every nerve in her body. She dances and makes music tangible; when they’re alone with only their reflections for company, they make their love real. She reaches out and Santana will take her hand and pull her close like in salsa dancing, except the only spinning that happens is when their lips meet and their bodies press together close enough that Brittany can feel Santana’s heart beating against her own chest.
Brittany knows by her heartbeat that something about them scares Santana. But she knows that when she’s dancing into her future, she wants Santana to be dancing next to her.
~*~
Fuck.
That’s the only though running through Santana’s head as she watches Brittany back away from her with wide, hurt, blue eyes. The look on the blonde’s face cracks something deep inside the other girl.
“Britt,” she pleads, reaching out the way she’s done a million times before.
Brittany does not take her hand.
Instead the blonde cheerleader does an about-face and flees from the kitchen that they’ve been occupying to get away from the rowdy party going on outside. She clips the entering Quinn’s shoulder as she tries to escape.
“Woah, Brittany! What’s wr-” But she’s gone before Quinn can finish.
Santana’s eyes follow her out into the large group of jocks and Cheerios until she is lost in the crowd.
“What the hell did you do?”
Her eyes snap back find Quinn with an expression that expects answers. She sneers instead of confiding.
“Mind your own fucking business, Juno.”
She tries to walk past the other girl and attempts not to reveal the fact that her eyes are scanning the crowd once again. A solid grip on her wrist tugs her back into place and she’s looking into hazel eyes when she wants to be downing ten shots of tequila to forget what just happened.
“She’s not going to wait around for you forever.” Quinn whispers softly.
Santana wants to say something, to make some snide comment, but she can’t. Instead she breaks eye contact and physical contact with Quinn.
Run. Find her. Tell her you’re sorry. Don’t let her go. Make her stop hurting.
Instead of doing any of the things that her mind and heart are screaming at her, she turns and walks toward the kegs and the boys handing out frothing cups to the Cheerios around them. She can feel as Quinn looks on with disappointment. She ignores it.
Fan