Darkness cover me......
Why do people fear what they dont understand? Why should I be afraid to go outside wearing what make me feel like the true person I am. I guess thats why I like Halloween so much, its the one day I get to wear the clothes I want and no one looks at you funny. When you wear a cloak in 100 Deg. weather I guess why people would look at me strange *rolls her eyes* but on to other things of how much this world and life sucks. I talked to my dad on Thursday, he gave me some money and then left. Last night as I layed in the dark listening to my Disturbed CD I could have just died, I never wanted a hug from someone I loved more than I did last night. I didnt get one but I am still here to talk to you today. It makes my cry sometimes that I cant help who I really am, my mother always brought me up in a wiccan family and we were always very dark vamp type people. I cant help but lock myself in my room and watch Queen Of The Damned. I know who I am just scared to be it. Anyways, on to other news, my friend is going for a preg. test today. Am I a bad person for not showing emotion because im scared, am I a bad person for not letting anyone get close to me because im scared. Its hard to learn to trust people and family when they stab you in the back and the only friends you have to lean on in bad times is your fathers drug dealers. Im just wayt too stressed with all of this crap. I can feel the break down coming soon, last ngiht I thought it was it but I guess I held strong. Im too depressed, stressed, down, blue, sleepy, sick, insane, mad, to deal with this shit right now. back to my dark room and my disturbed CD *awayyyyyy*-Nina