(no subject)
I'm still wondering if I should give up on a certain hobby. It's not very fun now, and, quite frankly, I've been a bit fed up with it recently. I also know that my antics have made more than one person fed up with me as well. I don't really want to give up--I'd like to have fun again, but I'm not sure if that's possible. I might want to bail out now before the bad memories outweigh the good ones.
Hmmm...I had a nightmare in which my dog was put to sleep, and I was told that it would happen the day of. Then I had to go do something (I forgot exactly what) with that weighing on my mind. After that, I hurried home and clung to him, distraught. I think that's the closest I've come to waking up crying. Having grown up with this dog, I think of him as something similar to a sibling and am very attached to him.
I'm guessing I had that dream because of a conversation I in which I engaged last night. Sections of it elicited unhappy thoughts from me, but I don't regret having it. I think I dwell too much on one of the subjects that it covered, but I'd like to think that's natural.
I just want to make it through this month. I want to remember, but I also don't want to dwell. I'm not sure how to balance the happiness and sorrow, but I think I should find a way. Masochism won't reverse what happened. However, escapism serves no better as a remedy--I know this very well. I'll figure out something.
...Writing this gave me the sudden urge to play Tales of the Abyss, preferably co-op. Go figure. In any case, I can't do that for many reasons. Fweee Wednesday, you are sort of fun, but you consume my life--or lack thereof.
Hmmm...I had a nightmare in which my dog was put to sleep, and I was told that it would happen the day of. Then I had to go do something (I forgot exactly what) with that weighing on my mind. After that, I hurried home and clung to him, distraught. I think that's the closest I've come to waking up crying. Having grown up with this dog, I think of him as something similar to a sibling and am very attached to him.
I'm guessing I had that dream because of a conversation I in which I engaged last night. Sections of it elicited unhappy thoughts from me, but I don't regret having it. I think I dwell too much on one of the subjects that it covered, but I'd like to think that's natural.
I just want to make it through this month. I want to remember, but I also don't want to dwell. I'm not sure how to balance the happiness and sorrow, but I think I should find a way. Masochism won't reverse what happened. However, escapism serves no better as a remedy--I know this very well. I'll figure out something.
...Writing this gave me the sudden urge to play Tales of the Abyss, preferably co-op. Go figure. In any case, I can't do that for many reasons. Fweee Wednesday, you are sort of fun, but you consume my life--or lack thereof.