What to do when u've done it all already?
hooo hummm....you have to be in a pretty weird mood to write in purple...guess im just weird
i dunno what to do about all my problems...or lack there of....im always so uncontent, or incontent?? is that the word? well whatever, ne ways...heres sum pretty funny/crazy/weird/random stuff that caught my eye,and ALL of it was ripped off from my friends, enjoy.....
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"fo shizzle ma nizzle" is a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastdardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African American brother"
Andy Rooney said on "60 Minutes" a few weeks back
(for those of you that don't know Andy Rooney, he is an 82 year old US TV commentator.)
**Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
My opinion:
Baseball bats and cars were not invented to kill, as guns were. Guns also provide an easy way for potential killers to kill someone. If you are being attacked by someone with a baseball bat, you can run or fight back. If you're being run down by a car, you can find a way to get out of the way if you use your intelligence. If you have a gun pointed at you, you are fucked.
**It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!"
My opinion:Good point. Just remember, it's one thing to say "NO!" and it's something else to say "NO YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT!!!!" while repeatingly hitting the small child.
**I am sick of "Political Correctness." I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa; so how can they be "African-Americans"? Besides, Af rica is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe. I am proud to be from America and nowhere else.
And if you don't like my point of view, tough...
My Opinion: I concur andy!
OKAY well i agree with all of the following:
**I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything, except
numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory
are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black
Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the
United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment
Television, or Miss White America, and see what happens. Jesse Jackson will be
knocking down your door.
**Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning 'lousy hunter
**Did you know that it costs forty-thousand dollars a year to house each prisoner? Jeez, for forty-thousand apiece, I'll take a few prisoners into my house. I live in Los Angeles. I already have bars on the windows. I don't think we should give free room and board to criminals. I think they should have to run twelve hours a day on a treadmill and generate electricity. And if they don't want to run, they can rest in the chair that's hooked up to the generator.
**It's weird when pregnant women feel the baby kicking. They say, 'Oh my. He's kicking. Do you wanna feel it?' I always feel awkward reaching over there. Come on! It's weird to ask someone to feel your stomach. I don't do that when I have gas. "Oh my...give me your hand...It won't be long now..."
**The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating...you finish off as a gleam.
**My grandmother has a bumper sticker on her car that says, 'Sexy Senior Citizen.' You don't want to think of your grandmother that way, do you? Out entering wet shawl contests. Makes you wonder where she got that dollar she gave you for your birthday.
**Did you ever hear one of these corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? " Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is: "Share the love." - Beep. - "Uh, yeah ... this is the VD clinic calling ... Speaking of being positive, your test results are back. Stop sharing the love."
**Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's Disease research, it is believed that by the year 2030 there will be a large number of people wandering around with huge breasts and erections ... who can't remember what to do with them.
**Have you ever noticed? ... Anybody going slower than you is an idiot. And anyone going faster is a maniac.
**Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
**I wish people spent less time praying and more time trying to solve the problems religion was created to help us endure
okay now these r just random, not from andy:
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty is an egg?
"You Learn Something New Every Day" - Actually, you learn
something old every day. Just because you've just learned it,
doesn't mean it's new.
What's the opposite of opposite?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why is it that cargo is transported by ship, while a shipment is transported by car?
Why do u park on a drive way and drive on a parkway?
Who was the first to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things, and drink whatever comes out?"
Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually turns on?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
k thats it.good night!