dreams fall around you in a hazy rain
i really don't know what to say... i don't think there's much of anything to say about this.
except that it's FUCKED UP.
Amanda, Shane, Nyssa... this shit isn't supposed to happen. I swear I never saw it coming or I'd have stopped it. You are all amazing and wonderful and I can't imagine my life now without you.
Amanda... you're beautiful. You're the light of every day at that dreary fucking school I'm stuck at everyday. If I didn't have you there, I would have ended up without so many friends i have now, and I would never have understood real, flawless beauty. You're wonderful and all that's happened just shows how strong you are. The fact that you're still here means that you have a purpose. You have to stay with me because I couldn't live without you here.
Shane... you're the sweetest guy I know. I can't imagine anyone ever saying otherwise. Don't let people tell you that you aren't wonderful because you are. I love having you as a friend, and my life has gotten so much better since we started talking again. it took me a long time to understand just how amazing you are, and now i never want to lose that. Please stay strong through this, someday it will be a distant memory.
Nyssa... it's unfair for you to go through this. You're beautiful and talented and undeserving of any pain. Having you around makes everyday fun and worthwhile. Don't let it all suck you down, you'll be a stronger and better person if and when you rise above.
To the others in my life who are feeling pain... I am so sorry. I know who you are, and if I had the courage or the willpower I would list every one of you in this entry. I hope I make you understand everyday how much you mean to me in my life. I really hope that when we're all past this, we can look back with smiles on the fact that we made it through and that we have memories together.
i'm not going to complain. i'm simply going to pray.
except that it's FUCKED UP.
Amanda, Shane, Nyssa... this shit isn't supposed to happen. I swear I never saw it coming or I'd have stopped it. You are all amazing and wonderful and I can't imagine my life now without you.
Amanda... you're beautiful. You're the light of every day at that dreary fucking school I'm stuck at everyday. If I didn't have you there, I would have ended up without so many friends i have now, and I would never have understood real, flawless beauty. You're wonderful and all that's happened just shows how strong you are. The fact that you're still here means that you have a purpose. You have to stay with me because I couldn't live without you here.
Shane... you're the sweetest guy I know. I can't imagine anyone ever saying otherwise. Don't let people tell you that you aren't wonderful because you are. I love having you as a friend, and my life has gotten so much better since we started talking again. it took me a long time to understand just how amazing you are, and now i never want to lose that. Please stay strong through this, someday it will be a distant memory.
Nyssa... it's unfair for you to go through this. You're beautiful and talented and undeserving of any pain. Having you around makes everyday fun and worthwhile. Don't let it all suck you down, you'll be a stronger and better person if and when you rise above.
To the others in my life who are feeling pain... I am so sorry. I know who you are, and if I had the courage or the willpower I would list every one of you in this entry. I hope I make you understand everyday how much you mean to me in my life. I really hope that when we're all past this, we can look back with smiles on the fact that we made it through and that we have memories together.
i'm not going to complain. i'm simply going to pray.