Venting..Cuz I can.
I feel like updating but I don't know what to say.Today I started drawing on my skin...Yesterday I helped Steve and AJ cut down trees in my yard.I told my mom cutting was fun.She told me I should just cut up paper when I feel like doing that.I could go through a whole notebook if I did that.But maybe it would work?That's not the point though.That's not why I do it.I do it for the proof of it all.But whatever, Today we had Advisor/Advisee.I have my courses pretty much all picked out.It's going to be an easy year next year.But Bill won't be here. And it's going to suck major monkey balls.I don't know how I'm going to do it.But I guess I have to find a way.At least I'll have my license by then.
And I'll get to hang out with him after work or something.I just don't know.I can't wait until I get my license. I technically could've already had it,But mom didn't think I was ready.She doesn't think I can do a lot of things.She tends to put me down a lot.And nobody else understands that.When I'm with my friends, she's completely different.When it's just me and her, all hell breaks loose.But whatever, I don't care.I have to work after school today, as usual.And then I have an appointment after that.I might not have to work tomorrow.So I guess I can hang out with Bill. But only for like 2 hours or so.But 2 hours is better than nothing at all.I don't really get to see Bill anymore.We're always busy, and our schedules have changed.I see him passing periods once or twice, but that's it.And he has fencing on weekends and stuff, Which is awesome and everything, but I don't get to hang out with him as much.It really sucks...And Steve hasn't talked to me in so long. I mean yeah, he came over yesterday, but he was with AJay, which made it seem like he wasn't even there. He doesn't care about me anymore. I feel like my family has just disappeared into thin air. I don't communicate with any family members anymore. Or when I do, we end up getting into an argument. That's not how it should be, but it is. And I can't stand it. At this point in time I honestly don't know who I can rely on. Besides Bill. He's everything to me. That's why I don't know what I'm going to do next year. I'm going to have to see him like every day after work. Make it part of my schedule. Because it's that important to me. It would mean the world to me. I love him with ALL my heart, and that will Never Ever change.
<3
-Becka
And I'll get to hang out with him after work or something.I just don't know.I can't wait until I get my license. I technically could've already had it,But mom didn't think I was ready.She doesn't think I can do a lot of things.She tends to put me down a lot.And nobody else understands that.When I'm with my friends, she's completely different.When it's just me and her, all hell breaks loose.But whatever, I don't care.I have to work after school today, as usual.And then I have an appointment after that.I might not have to work tomorrow.So I guess I can hang out with Bill. But only for like 2 hours or so.But 2 hours is better than nothing at all.I don't really get to see Bill anymore.We're always busy, and our schedules have changed.I see him passing periods once or twice, but that's it.And he has fencing on weekends and stuff, Which is awesome and everything, but I don't get to hang out with him as much.It really sucks...And Steve hasn't talked to me in so long. I mean yeah, he came over yesterday, but he was with AJay, which made it seem like he wasn't even there. He doesn't care about me anymore. I feel like my family has just disappeared into thin air. I don't communicate with any family members anymore. Or when I do, we end up getting into an argument. That's not how it should be, but it is. And I can't stand it. At this point in time I honestly don't know who I can rely on. Besides Bill. He's everything to me. That's why I don't know what I'm going to do next year. I'm going to have to see him like every day after work. Make it part of my schedule. Because it's that important to me. It would mean the world to me. I love him with ALL my heart, and that will Never Ever change.
<3
-Becka