Dear Prudence
As I re-enter the hormone-infused world of college students, I find myself thinking a lot about sex, and the consequences it can have.
Doing HIV prevention education and tutoring kids whose dads have skipped out on them, I've started thinking that there's no such thing as casual sex. Whenever a risk of pregnancy is involved, women bear that burden disproportionately more than men. Obviously, there's a biological component to that, but there's a staggering socio-economic one as well (as our courts have decided that coughing up child support is comparable to the 24-hour adventure of raising a child).
People in abusive relationships don't always have control over when/with whom they're having sex. That shit is serious!
Is the ability to have sex a la carte (to borrow a phrase from Down With Love) what has equalized women with men? I sure hope not. Plus, that's really degrading to men, to assume they are defined by their willingness to have sex outside the context of a relationship.
I think abstinence-only education is one of the world's dumbest inventions. If anything, I think the best sex education would be truly *comprehensive* - discussing your options for sex, how to protect yourself and your partner, discussing (honestly, without fear tactics) the pros and cons of sex, and discussing the makings of a healthy relationship (if you're in a marriage, it shouldn't be with someone who demeans you. if you go home for a one-night stand, it shouldn't be with someone who demeans you. and everyone deserves to know that, no matter their political - or sexual - beliefs).
Maybe I'm being uptight about this. College taught me that hippies take sex much more seriously than a lot of uber-conservatives think. I don't know of *anyone* - pro-life or pro-choice - who takes abortion lightly, for instance.
What do you guys think?
Doing HIV prevention education and tutoring kids whose dads have skipped out on them, I've started thinking that there's no such thing as casual sex. Whenever a risk of pregnancy is involved, women bear that burden disproportionately more than men. Obviously, there's a biological component to that, but there's a staggering socio-economic one as well (as our courts have decided that coughing up child support is comparable to the 24-hour adventure of raising a child).
People in abusive relationships don't always have control over when/with whom they're having sex. That shit is serious!
Is the ability to have sex a la carte (to borrow a phrase from Down With Love) what has equalized women with men? I sure hope not. Plus, that's really degrading to men, to assume they are defined by their willingness to have sex outside the context of a relationship.
I think abstinence-only education is one of the world's dumbest inventions. If anything, I think the best sex education would be truly *comprehensive* - discussing your options for sex, how to protect yourself and your partner, discussing (honestly, without fear tactics) the pros and cons of sex, and discussing the makings of a healthy relationship (if you're in a marriage, it shouldn't be with someone who demeans you. if you go home for a one-night stand, it shouldn't be with someone who demeans you. and everyone deserves to know that, no matter their political - or sexual - beliefs).
Maybe I'm being uptight about this. College taught me that hippies take sex much more seriously than a lot of uber-conservatives think. I don't know of *anyone* - pro-life or pro-choice - who takes abortion lightly, for instance.
What do you guys think?