my WONDERFUL *rolls eyes* day...
I was upset all day at school...Contemplating on how andre felt...I was so happy that i was gonna hang out with him today. I wanted to see him so bad...I begged and begged for mother to take me the mall and she finally caved. I was so happy! During class i wrote an note to Andre that i was gonna give to him...and i will tell you why i still have it a little later...
Anj,
Hey baby, I'm really sorry about how i acted yesterday...I am just so scared of losing you. I love you so much and want to have little children that will be just as kinky as we are. Oh my goodnes...we don't need anymore Kayla's running around! I love you so much and next Monday it'll be 5 fun,passionate, and loving months we've been together. I read the note you wrote me OVER AND OVER again. I cried myself to sleep and woke up feeling refreshed and i had a wonderful dream about us in it together. I love you so much and i don't ever wanna lose you *flips page* I love your fucking life and i can't wait to see you today...
....then i made a heard and with the word "Always" in and and signed my name...
OH YEAH, we cant forget the "i love andres" and Kayla and Andre 11-29-03's"
In Math Joe told me to listen to this sonfg by yellowcard and said he thought i'd like it. it was OCTOBER NIGHTS! Me and Andre's song!! i was so happy...i knew it was gonna be a good day.Anyway, I left school and came home. I wrote to andre's cell...no response...i figured his phoen was just being gay...so i waited and waited...2:30 rolls around and i call him...
this is our conversation
Me..."hey...guess hwat i can go to the mall!"
him...*silence* " i don't think i can go...i don't feel gooD Jon and them put laxitives in my water..and ive been feeling shitty all day..."
me..."oh..."
him..."I will see i will call you when i get home OK?"
me..."Ok. I lov--"
___Click___
I ran upstairs and patientl waited and waited...i tried calling his house...he wasn't there...and then i tried his cell but he "ignored" my calls...(he has a button that automatically sends a call to the machine if u dont want to get it)
I cried and cried...
he imed me
him..."I dont want to go you said you didn't want to see me today"
me..."Andre i nkow..but i was mad and upset...i am sorry...please answer me...or ur phone...please andre...*sobs as she types this*
10 minutes later...
Him..."I dont want to go"
I copied and pasted that to Kristen and Kelley... i knew this was gonna happen i just knew it.
Kelley called him...he answered...and said that he needed to think...and he'll call me tonight...
I bawled and bawled...I called Dan and cried my eyes out...i wanted to throw up so i got off the phone...puked my brains out...and went outside
I smoked 10 cigarrettes in the matter of an hour or so...i just kept lighting and lighting...hoping the pain would slowly dissappear....but it didn't.
I sat in the sunlight and whenever i seemed to start crying again a cloud would come and hide the sunlight...making me cold and shiver. I went back inside and just stared blankly at my monitor...i tried to read what i types...it was so hard to see...My mom saw my crying and i told her what happened...she comforted me and said "sometimes you think you know someone kayla...that's all...there are other fish in the sea..."
and i replied "Mom all the other fish are the ones with the light that attracts you to them and then they eat you...andre is...my NEMO..."
she smiled and hugged me...
I talked on the computer some more...and i told Jon how shitty i felt (which was dumb) but he responded, prolly with a huge smile on his face as he typed this, "Oh i think he is at Sam's now..." I bawled for another hour or so...i just looked at the computer screen and went "huh?" i was so confuesd and upset...I
walked outside again for my 7th cigarette and i saw a car pull up. It was Dan...He was like "Kayla i love your life" and hugged me...i told him what happened and everything...he said "you are hott kayla you can get any guy" and i said " not as good as andre...adnre is PERFECT..." we talked for a while and he left...i ate dinner and still am so curious on what is gonna happen tonight...all these thoughts are runnning through my head...
DOES HE LOVE ME?
AM I GONNA LOSE HIM B/C OF ME OVERREACTING?
WILL HE EVER FORGIVE ME...?
All of these i am not sure about...i wonder when he'll call...*sigh*...i am scared
i mean...Can you really blame me?
oh and uggh...Andre took a pic of Sam...this is what she looks like...
you guys...i really don't want to lose this...
...
Anj,
Hey baby, I'm really sorry about how i acted yesterday...I am just so scared of losing you. I love you so much and want to have little children that will be just as kinky as we are. Oh my goodnes...we don't need anymore Kayla's running around! I love you so much and next Monday it'll be 5 fun,passionate, and loving months we've been together. I read the note you wrote me OVER AND OVER again. I cried myself to sleep and woke up feeling refreshed and i had a wonderful dream about us in it together. I love you so much and i don't ever wanna lose you *flips page* I love your fucking life and i can't wait to see you today...
....then i made a heard and with the word "Always" in and and signed my name...
OH YEAH, we cant forget the "i love andres" and Kayla and Andre 11-29-03's"
In Math Joe told me to listen to this sonfg by yellowcard and said he thought i'd like it. it was OCTOBER NIGHTS! Me and Andre's song!! i was so happy...i knew it was gonna be a good day.Anyway, I left school and came home. I wrote to andre's cell...no response...i figured his phoen was just being gay...so i waited and waited...2:30 rolls around and i call him...
this is our conversation
Me..."hey...guess hwat i can go to the mall!"
him...*silence* " i don't think i can go...i don't feel gooD Jon and them put laxitives in my water..and ive been feeling shitty all day..."
me..."oh..."
him..."I will see i will call you when i get home OK?"
me..."Ok. I lov--"
___Click___
I ran upstairs and patientl waited and waited...i tried calling his house...he wasn't there...and then i tried his cell but he "ignored" my calls...(he has a button that automatically sends a call to the machine if u dont want to get it)
I cried and cried...
he imed me
him..."I dont want to go you said you didn't want to see me today"
me..."Andre i nkow..but i was mad and upset...i am sorry...please answer me...or ur phone...please andre...*sobs as she types this*
10 minutes later...
Him..."I dont want to go"
I copied and pasted that to Kristen and Kelley... i knew this was gonna happen i just knew it.
Kelley called him...he answered...and said that he needed to think...and he'll call me tonight...
I bawled and bawled...I called Dan and cried my eyes out...i wanted to throw up so i got off the phone...puked my brains out...and went outside
I smoked 10 cigarrettes in the matter of an hour or so...i just kept lighting and lighting...hoping the pain would slowly dissappear....but it didn't.
I sat in the sunlight and whenever i seemed to start crying again a cloud would come and hide the sunlight...making me cold and shiver. I went back inside and just stared blankly at my monitor...i tried to read what i types...it was so hard to see...My mom saw my crying and i told her what happened...she comforted me and said "sometimes you think you know someone kayla...that's all...there are other fish in the sea..."
and i replied "Mom all the other fish are the ones with the light that attracts you to them and then they eat you...andre is...my NEMO..."
she smiled and hugged me...
I talked on the computer some more...and i told Jon how shitty i felt (which was dumb) but he responded, prolly with a huge smile on his face as he typed this, "Oh i think he is at Sam's now..." I bawled for another hour or so...i just looked at the computer screen and went "huh?" i was so confuesd and upset...I
walked outside again for my 7th cigarette and i saw a car pull up. It was Dan...He was like "Kayla i love your life" and hugged me...i told him what happened and everything...he said "you are hott kayla you can get any guy" and i said " not as good as andre...adnre is PERFECT..." we talked for a while and he left...i ate dinner and still am so curious on what is gonna happen tonight...all these thoughts are runnning through my head...
DOES HE LOVE ME?
AM I GONNA LOSE HIM B/C OF ME OVERREACTING?
WILL HE EVER FORGIVE ME...?
All of these i am not sure about...i wonder when he'll call...*sigh*...i am scared
i mean...Can you really blame me?
oh and uggh...Andre took a pic of Sam...this is what she looks like...
you guys...i really don't want to lose this...
...