im gone.

[sexinyourveins]

im fucked up.
drunk and high.
its amazing.

i love this feeling.
not drunk, not too high. just right.
where everything is beautiful.
i dont have to worry, not have to wonder.
i am me, my crazy, fucked up, sad, happy self.
this right here is me,. rachel.

liking someone but not knowing.
loving someone and hating.
being siappointed and happy.
my life is in the gray. no black and white.
thats an addict for you.

i am at that point me.
the fucked up bitch that skipped my mom and to me.
i love this side, but at the same time despise it.

beauty is in the eye of the beholder. i am past that.
i cant funtion without makeup and pills, without weed.
i need a seady high to be happu. but thats sad.
i want to be me without drugs or beer.
im letting everyone down and lying but, where am i?
in in my lowest low, but pride is i cant take help.

i love the happy me.
see me now? here i am?the real me..
ask what you will.

love, the one and only, Rae
<33