and Ghobi rambled on and on....

[sexandchaos]

Well I'm not pregnant, which is always a plus. Life is just rolling right along though. I realized yesterday that damn, we are really growing up. I was sitting in the car with Stefan and Tri and they were talking about moving after they graduate which happens to be this year and I thought hell, after a few months I'm never going to see these people again. I dedicated so much time to them and they are going to leave. Hell in 3 years or so we're all going to be graduated and gone and god damn I know we aren't going to keep in touch with half the people we know. It feels like I've spent all this time with people, trying to make an impression, and trying to keep them around for nothing because they are all just going to leave. Its kinda like "Damn, what have I been doing all this time?" I don't mean to sound whiney or anything if it is coming off that way. It really shouldn't be because I have the damndest confused look on my face but still. Anyways, its like I'm staying the same and everyone around me is changing. Somewhat like someone pressed a fastforward button but forgot to put me in the vcr, if that makes any sense. I guess somewhere in my head I never thought I was going to make it this far and I'd have to deal with looing everyone I've given any mind too and held with respect. Everyone I've ever loved for that matter. Its just like what the hell are we doing with our lives man. Sorry for having a slightly hippie moment but god damn... Just... damn... We really are wasting our lives doing nothing and making no effort to improve that.

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Sorry that it had to end this way,
Now I guess you're looking for an answer
If we're not gone tomorrow,
This might end up in sorrow.
Those dreams, had passed you long ago...
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