Iron Man Fic: Working Lunch (gen)
Words: 1175
Rating: PG, because Tony's pervy
Summary: Major James Rhodes has his first meeting with Tony Stark.
Rhodes smoothed down his tie, straighted the pins on his uniform and took one last calming deep breath. The elevator dinged and the doors slid open on the top floor of Stark Industry's executive offices. A young man rushed past him through the open doors the moment Rhodes stepped off without even an "excuse me." He was clutching at a stack of manila folders in one hand and with the other repeatedly jabbing at the buttons as if that ever made an elevator go faster. Turning around, Rhodes saw that the entire floor was a flurry with moving bodies, phones ringing, and papers being passed from hand to hand.
From the turmoil emerged a pretty red-head. Though walking at an impressive pace in four-inch stilettos, she seemed calm in comparison to her coworkers. "Major Rhodes?" She switched her clipboard from her right hand to her left in order to shake his hand. "Virginia Potts. Mr Stark's personal assistant. Will you come this way please?"
She turned and continued her swift pace. She managed to walk in a straight line to the back offices, whereas Rhodes found himself jostled by and sidestepping more frantic interns. "Sorry about the chaos," Miss Potts said over her shoulder, "but it's not often Mr. Stark actually comes to the office, and when he does.... Well, when Tony Stark says 'jump.'"
They came to a pair of large doors. Without stopping to knock, Miss Potts opened them. Given the ordeal outside those doors, Rhodes was expecting to find Tony Stark busy as well, pacing, shouting orders into phones, pen furiously writing across stacks of papers. Instead, the famous industrialist was leaning back in his chair, feet on his desk and folding a paper airplane. The evidence of previous flight attempts littered the carpet.
"Tony, your 12:30 with the new Air Force liaison."
Stark looked up from his folding. "12:30 already? God, I'm starving. You hungry?" He looked at Rhodes.
"Well, I-"
"Good! Working lunch." Stark grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair. "Pepper, hold my calls. And can you get me some singles?" Pepper rolled her eyes, but left to presumably do what he asked. Stark took Rhodes by the elbow. "Come on, I know a place. You'll love it."
Rhodes didn't know strip clubs were open for lunch. They shared a table near the stage. Stark had undone his tie and popped open the top buttons of his shirt. Rhodes, not realizing until it was too late where exactly this "working lunch" was taking place was still in every inch of his uniform. He kept his eyes on the table, afraid that if he looked up he would actually see the words "conduct unbecoming" floating in the air.
"Loosen up, Major." Stark said, over the loud bass a slim young woman was currently grinding to up on the stage. "I don't have to keep calling you that, do I? What's your first name again?" They actually hadn't been properly introduced.
"James."
"James? That's not better. That's boring. What's your last?"
"It's Rhodes, sir."
"Rhodes...Rhodes, yeah that's better. Oh, and don't call me 'sir,' save that for your C.O.s"
"Yes, Mr. Stark."
Stark sighed. "Tony. It's Tony. Can you do that? I like to keep my liaisons informal."
He looked at Stark who smirked, hoping for a reaction from his little innuendo. Rhodes smirked back. "From what I've heard of you, Mis- Tony, I'd expect nothing less."
Tony laughed, slapping the table in front of him. The tension broken, all of Rhodes' nervousness melted away. Tony Stark was not some awe-inspiring god of war. He was just a guy. A very powerful and very weird guy, but he'd heard that all geniuses were eccentric. Tony hailed a passing waitress. "Wanda! Drinks for me and my buddy, here. What'll you have?"
"Whatever you're having."
"Great. Two scotch, on the rocks." He took a roll of singles from his pocket, removed a few and tucked them neatly in her well-exposed cleavage, then gave her a friendly smack on the ass as she walked away. "I think you're going to do all right, kid."
"Kid? Please, I'm no younger than you."
"Yeah? Prove it. Grow some facial hair or something, you look like you've never held a razor to your face."
Rhodes nodded his head at Tony's chin where a very neat and purposefully designed beard grew. "Because that's the height of masculinity."
"You better believe it." Tony's gaze was distracted as the music started-up again and a dark beauty slinked down the catwalk. She was already wearing so little, Rhodes didn't know what she could actually strip with. "Cocoa!" Tony called up to the woman. "Looking beautiful."
"Cocoa" smiled, flashing rows of bleached teeth. "Just how beautiful, Tony?"
Great, he was on first name basis with strippers. Cocoa gyrated to the edge of the stage. She then got down all fours, giving a view as ample as her breasts. Tony had started taking more bills from a roll Rhodes remember Miss Potts handing him as they left the office. He wasn't even counting them. "You can't expect me to put price on that kind of loveliness."
Oh for...women didn't really go for that sort of lines do they? The fact that Cocoa giggled as Tony inserted the bills into her cleavage, Rhodes figured was just all part of her job.
"Why don't you give my friend here something special?"
Rhodes choked on his drink. "Tony, no. I shouldn't even be in here much less-"
"Ah, come on! Who's going to tell your superior officers? I'm not. If you're foolish enough to put it in your report on our meeting, that's not my problem."
"I do love a man in uniform," Cocoa purred.
"Are you going to deny this lady the chance to support our troops?"
"Yes," Rhodes said sternly.
Cocoa pouted. Tony shrugged at her. She slid back up on the stage and turned her attention to the pole in the center of it.
Tony smirked at him. "I bet you're thinking right now you know why the other guy asked for reassignment."
"He didn't ask-"
"Oh, he did. No sense of humor. Didn't like me at all. You know at one point he actually called me a 'whipper-snapper'?"
Rhodes laughed despite himself. He had met the previous liaison once, a Col. Merrit. He was an older man with receding white hair and a permanent scowl. "I can imagine he even threatened to take you over his knee."
"He never suggested it, afraid I'd take him up on it and enjoy it." Tony winked.
Rhodes controlled his laughter with a sobering cough. "Seriously, though, Tony. We really need to talk some kind business or I'll be reassigned."
Tony's expression turned serious for a moment. "We wouldn't want that, would we? Okay, let me order another round and you can tell me what the Air Force needs blown up, and I can tell you what I can do to make it happen."
Rating: PG, because Tony's pervy
Summary: Major James Rhodes has his first meeting with Tony Stark.
Rhodes smoothed down his tie, straighted the pins on his uniform and took one last calming deep breath. The elevator dinged and the doors slid open on the top floor of Stark Industry's executive offices. A young man rushed past him through the open doors the moment Rhodes stepped off without even an "excuse me." He was clutching at a stack of manila folders in one hand and with the other repeatedly jabbing at the buttons as if that ever made an elevator go faster. Turning around, Rhodes saw that the entire floor was a flurry with moving bodies, phones ringing, and papers being passed from hand to hand.
From the turmoil emerged a pretty red-head. Though walking at an impressive pace in four-inch stilettos, she seemed calm in comparison to her coworkers. "Major Rhodes?" She switched her clipboard from her right hand to her left in order to shake his hand. "Virginia Potts. Mr Stark's personal assistant. Will you come this way please?"
She turned and continued her swift pace. She managed to walk in a straight line to the back offices, whereas Rhodes found himself jostled by and sidestepping more frantic interns. "Sorry about the chaos," Miss Potts said over her shoulder, "but it's not often Mr. Stark actually comes to the office, and when he does.... Well, when Tony Stark says 'jump.'"
They came to a pair of large doors. Without stopping to knock, Miss Potts opened them. Given the ordeal outside those doors, Rhodes was expecting to find Tony Stark busy as well, pacing, shouting orders into phones, pen furiously writing across stacks of papers. Instead, the famous industrialist was leaning back in his chair, feet on his desk and folding a paper airplane. The evidence of previous flight attempts littered the carpet.
"Tony, your 12:30 with the new Air Force liaison."
Stark looked up from his folding. "12:30 already? God, I'm starving. You hungry?" He looked at Rhodes.
"Well, I-"
"Good! Working lunch." Stark grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair. "Pepper, hold my calls. And can you get me some singles?" Pepper rolled her eyes, but left to presumably do what he asked. Stark took Rhodes by the elbow. "Come on, I know a place. You'll love it."
Rhodes didn't know strip clubs were open for lunch. They shared a table near the stage. Stark had undone his tie and popped open the top buttons of his shirt. Rhodes, not realizing until it was too late where exactly this "working lunch" was taking place was still in every inch of his uniform. He kept his eyes on the table, afraid that if he looked up he would actually see the words "conduct unbecoming" floating in the air.
"Loosen up, Major." Stark said, over the loud bass a slim young woman was currently grinding to up on the stage. "I don't have to keep calling you that, do I? What's your first name again?" They actually hadn't been properly introduced.
"James."
"James? That's not better. That's boring. What's your last?"
"It's Rhodes, sir."
"Rhodes...Rhodes, yeah that's better. Oh, and don't call me 'sir,' save that for your C.O.s"
"Yes, Mr. Stark."
Stark sighed. "Tony. It's Tony. Can you do that? I like to keep my liaisons informal."
He looked at Stark who smirked, hoping for a reaction from his little innuendo. Rhodes smirked back. "From what I've heard of you, Mis- Tony, I'd expect nothing less."
Tony laughed, slapping the table in front of him. The tension broken, all of Rhodes' nervousness melted away. Tony Stark was not some awe-inspiring god of war. He was just a guy. A very powerful and very weird guy, but he'd heard that all geniuses were eccentric. Tony hailed a passing waitress. "Wanda! Drinks for me and my buddy, here. What'll you have?"
"Whatever you're having."
"Great. Two scotch, on the rocks." He took a roll of singles from his pocket, removed a few and tucked them neatly in her well-exposed cleavage, then gave her a friendly smack on the ass as she walked away. "I think you're going to do all right, kid."
"Kid? Please, I'm no younger than you."
"Yeah? Prove it. Grow some facial hair or something, you look like you've never held a razor to your face."
Rhodes nodded his head at Tony's chin where a very neat and purposefully designed beard grew. "Because that's the height of masculinity."
"You better believe it." Tony's gaze was distracted as the music started-up again and a dark beauty slinked down the catwalk. She was already wearing so little, Rhodes didn't know what she could actually strip with. "Cocoa!" Tony called up to the woman. "Looking beautiful."
"Cocoa" smiled, flashing rows of bleached teeth. "Just how beautiful, Tony?"
Great, he was on first name basis with strippers. Cocoa gyrated to the edge of the stage. She then got down all fours, giving a view as ample as her breasts. Tony had started taking more bills from a roll Rhodes remember Miss Potts handing him as they left the office. He wasn't even counting them. "You can't expect me to put price on that kind of loveliness."
Oh for...women didn't really go for that sort of lines do they? The fact that Cocoa giggled as Tony inserted the bills into her cleavage, Rhodes figured was just all part of her job.
"Why don't you give my friend here something special?"
Rhodes choked on his drink. "Tony, no. I shouldn't even be in here much less-"
"Ah, come on! Who's going to tell your superior officers? I'm not. If you're foolish enough to put it in your report on our meeting, that's not my problem."
"I do love a man in uniform," Cocoa purred.
"Are you going to deny this lady the chance to support our troops?"
"Yes," Rhodes said sternly.
Cocoa pouted. Tony shrugged at her. She slid back up on the stage and turned her attention to the pole in the center of it.
Tony smirked at him. "I bet you're thinking right now you know why the other guy asked for reassignment."
"He didn't ask-"
"Oh, he did. No sense of humor. Didn't like me at all. You know at one point he actually called me a 'whipper-snapper'?"
Rhodes laughed despite himself. He had met the previous liaison once, a Col. Merrit. He was an older man with receding white hair and a permanent scowl. "I can imagine he even threatened to take you over his knee."
"He never suggested it, afraid I'd take him up on it and enjoy it." Tony winked.
Rhodes controlled his laughter with a sobering cough. "Seriously, though, Tony. We really need to talk some kind business or I'll be reassigned."
Tony's expression turned serious for a moment. "We wouldn't want that, would we? Okay, let me order another round and you can tell me what the Air Force needs blown up, and I can tell you what I can do to make it happen."