the random realization
Dear Readers,
you ever get to that point in your life where you have no clue what the fuck your doing?
like you ever wake up one morning and feel like your living the same forsaken day over and over again?
Well am there!
And now that I've realized i feel like i need to do something fun and random everyday. Like go out with people i don't go out with anymore or keep in touch - this is me where talking about i don't "keep in touch". And i feel like i need to go out and experience crap that really doesn't matter and I'll probably never remember years from now....or worse I'll remember and not think fondly of.
Any way a few days ago i was at work and apparently there is a rumor going around that about 7-8 girls are pregnant or think they could be in the restaurant. and of course i thought i wasn't one of them i mean how could i be right?
well in the next 5 minutes when i was thinking that i flashed through all of the possible signs of being pregnant and realized i couldn't remember the last time i had a period and i had though i had the stomach virus cause i had been throwing up everywhere but i wasn't 100% sure. in those next few seconds i found myself panicking and promising god - who i don't even believe in- that i wouldn't have sex the next time i really wanted to if he made sure it was negative .... as appose to promising him i would never had sex again because i mean lets be real!
so of course at that second i ran to buy a pregnancy test.
So there i am running through CVS, Wil - a coworker who came with me- who was looking for chocolates for another pregnant girl (isn't that comforting) was taking his time. When i got to the isle i realized that PREGNANCY TESTS ARE FUCKING EXPENSIVE! i had made $14 that which is by far the worst i have ever made. and it cost $13 ... i was pissed!
So, a nerves reck, am standing in line with Wil and when i get to the counter i throw everything (two items) down on the table and huddle close to the counter cause as much as you try to play it off like your not uncomfortable buy a pregnancy test no one can really feel comfortable buy one. esp when the counter guy takes for ever and asks you if you have a fucking CVS card when he knows i don't cause i was just in there that morning not more then an hour before to buy chips!
so then we walk back and i pee on the damn thing.
now if you've never peed on a pregnancy test let me just tell you this those damn sticks are the skinniest things ever seriously boys are not peeing on this and girls can't aim so why the hell don't they make it bigger. So my other co-worker who is the pregnant one Kiely is in the bathroom with me and walking me through it although i knew how to i was till confused cause i was so damn nervous. So she tells me i have to pee on it for at least 5 seconds which is hard cause i didn't realize the stick was going to be the size of my finger and i ended up peeing all over it.... and yea it was less then 5 seconds
now I've taken one before just for the hell of it really and it showed up right away. But this one took almost 5 min to show up and that was the longest 5 min of my life. i started contemplating on how to tell my parents or what i would do cause there ain't no way in hell i was raising a child at my age. And for some reason i really wanted cheese but that beside the point.
It came up negative and through all the negatives I've ever seen in my life - on a grade or a drug test - this was the happiest one.
and then i continued to throw up the rest of the day.
so I've realized am to young to settle down and fall in love and crap i just wanna hang out and see what happens. :) and so should you ... you know unless your 40 then maybe we should talk about find a significant other.
you ever get to that point in your life where you have no clue what the fuck your doing?
like you ever wake up one morning and feel like your living the same forsaken day over and over again?
Well am there!
And now that I've realized i feel like i need to do something fun and random everyday. Like go out with people i don't go out with anymore or keep in touch - this is me where talking about i don't "keep in touch". And i feel like i need to go out and experience crap that really doesn't matter and I'll probably never remember years from now....or worse I'll remember and not think fondly of.
Any way a few days ago i was at work and apparently there is a rumor going around that about 7-8 girls are pregnant or think they could be in the restaurant. and of course i thought i wasn't one of them i mean how could i be right?
well in the next 5 minutes when i was thinking that i flashed through all of the possible signs of being pregnant and realized i couldn't remember the last time i had a period and i had though i had the stomach virus cause i had been throwing up everywhere but i wasn't 100% sure. in those next few seconds i found myself panicking and promising god - who i don't even believe in- that i wouldn't have sex the next time i really wanted to if he made sure it was negative .... as appose to promising him i would never had sex again because i mean lets be real!
so of course at that second i ran to buy a pregnancy test.
So there i am running through CVS, Wil - a coworker who came with me- who was looking for chocolates for another pregnant girl (isn't that comforting) was taking his time. When i got to the isle i realized that PREGNANCY TESTS ARE FUCKING EXPENSIVE! i had made $14 that which is by far the worst i have ever made. and it cost $13 ... i was pissed!
So, a nerves reck, am standing in line with Wil and when i get to the counter i throw everything (two items) down on the table and huddle close to the counter cause as much as you try to play it off like your not uncomfortable buy a pregnancy test no one can really feel comfortable buy one. esp when the counter guy takes for ever and asks you if you have a fucking CVS card when he knows i don't cause i was just in there that morning not more then an hour before to buy chips!
so then we walk back and i pee on the damn thing.
now if you've never peed on a pregnancy test let me just tell you this those damn sticks are the skinniest things ever seriously boys are not peeing on this and girls can't aim so why the hell don't they make it bigger. So my other co-worker who is the pregnant one Kiely is in the bathroom with me and walking me through it although i knew how to i was till confused cause i was so damn nervous. So she tells me i have to pee on it for at least 5 seconds which is hard cause i didn't realize the stick was going to be the size of my finger and i ended up peeing all over it.... and yea it was less then 5 seconds
now I've taken one before just for the hell of it really and it showed up right away. But this one took almost 5 min to show up and that was the longest 5 min of my life. i started contemplating on how to tell my parents or what i would do cause there ain't no way in hell i was raising a child at my age. And for some reason i really wanted cheese but that beside the point.
It came up negative and through all the negatives I've ever seen in my life - on a grade or a drug test - this was the happiest one.
and then i continued to throw up the rest of the day.
so I've realized am to young to settle down and fall in love and crap i just wanna hang out and see what happens. :) and so should you ... you know unless your 40 then maybe we should talk about find a significant other.