Giving up
Yup, I'm giving up on trying to get pregnant. Its been nearly a year with a four month stop due to BC.
I know, I know, you need time to get things back to normal. But that doesn't mean I'm going back on the BC. I'm giving up for several reasons.
1. Dylan is getting very hard to control. I mean very hard. He's back talking like no 3 yr. old should. He's picked up that very bad habit from us. Plus he's not around too many children his age. In fact he's not in contact with them at all. So, we're going to get some daycare for him. Hopefully state funded so I don't have to worry about that monthly expense. @_@ Which means I'll have DHS even more up my arse than before. Great... * >.> * But if it gets him to interact with kids his own age, then I guess I can just get the hell over. If it helps, then great. As it is we are going to see a behavioral specialist to see what we can do to get this back talking stopped.
Plus we are getting an official test for autism and ADHD and ADD done. I hate to say it, but he may need to be medicated ( for the ADHD and ADD ) a little bit. And if he has a mild case of autism, we need to all learn how to deal with him better. @_@
2. David is being a pain the ass about getting a better job. He is still insisting on keeping his crummy one. Why, I don't know. I know we have shit jobs here and they are few and very far in between. But he needs something other than what he has right now. Also I am going to ask my therapist on how I can deal with my anxiety and panic attacks so I can work somewhere. But I'm not sure about them giving me the hours I need, which is less than part time so I can be home for Dylan. I know my parents will be there, but its just not the same, you know? I'm so used to being with him that going off to work will be very hard for me. And I know women everywhere do it all the time and I'm sure they also have a hard time adjusting. But if they can so can I. I hope.
Another thing I worry about is if I can keep doing Avon. Mom says I can get a bigger customer base if I work. I dunno. I'm not really sure to be honest. Not to mention the added pressure of doing both.
Those are the two main reasons why I'm stopping. I feel pressured now to get pregnant. Not to mention its stressing me out. While I'm having fun trying, but doing the tests and getting a negative answer is very dishearten each and every time. Also its hard to pinpoint my ovulation time. I've done a Basal chart of last month and some for this month and its consistently low with very few peaks above 98* and it only lasts for two or three days. Normal I know but still kind of low from what I've read about it.
I hate to give up, but that is what I'm going to do. Hell, maybe it'll happen when we're not aware of it. That's how I got pregnant with Daniel. =)
I know, I know, you need time to get things back to normal. But that doesn't mean I'm going back on the BC. I'm giving up for several reasons.
1. Dylan is getting very hard to control. I mean very hard. He's back talking like no 3 yr. old should. He's picked up that very bad habit from us. Plus he's not around too many children his age. In fact he's not in contact with them at all. So, we're going to get some daycare for him. Hopefully state funded so I don't have to worry about that monthly expense. @_@ Which means I'll have DHS even more up my arse than before. Great... * >.> * But if it gets him to interact with kids his own age, then I guess I can just get the hell over. If it helps, then great. As it is we are going to see a behavioral specialist to see what we can do to get this back talking stopped.
Plus we are getting an official test for autism and ADHD and ADD done. I hate to say it, but he may need to be medicated ( for the ADHD and ADD ) a little bit. And if he has a mild case of autism, we need to all learn how to deal with him better. @_@
2. David is being a pain the ass about getting a better job. He is still insisting on keeping his crummy one. Why, I don't know. I know we have shit jobs here and they are few and very far in between. But he needs something other than what he has right now. Also I am going to ask my therapist on how I can deal with my anxiety and panic attacks so I can work somewhere. But I'm not sure about them giving me the hours I need, which is less than part time so I can be home for Dylan. I know my parents will be there, but its just not the same, you know? I'm so used to being with him that going off to work will be very hard for me. And I know women everywhere do it all the time and I'm sure they also have a hard time adjusting. But if they can so can I. I hope.
Another thing I worry about is if I can keep doing Avon. Mom says I can get a bigger customer base if I work. I dunno. I'm not really sure to be honest. Not to mention the added pressure of doing both.
Those are the two main reasons why I'm stopping. I feel pressured now to get pregnant. Not to mention its stressing me out. While I'm having fun trying, but doing the tests and getting a negative answer is very dishearten each and every time. Also its hard to pinpoint my ovulation time. I've done a Basal chart of last month and some for this month and its consistently low with very few peaks above 98* and it only lasts for two or three days. Normal I know but still kind of low from what I've read about it.
I hate to give up, but that is what I'm going to do. Hell, maybe it'll happen when we're not aware of it. That's how I got pregnant with Daniel. =)