this is your life (apink, hayoung-centric)
this is your life
apink, hayoung-centric, 250w, g
notes: this could be something a lot bigger and a lot better but i'm a lazy asshole so. maybe i'll expand on it one day.
Watch yourself.
It’s drilled into them from day one.
Watch what you say, watch what you do, watch who you are.
They say that it’s for public image, for the good of the group.
All Hayoung hears is be anyone but yourself.
+
It’s too easy to actually listen to them, to read out the scripts they hand her, to sing out the lines they give her, to sit stock-still while they dress her up and cover her in make-up and tell her how to move.
It’s too easy to smile when they tell her to smile and break when they tell her to break.
+
She forgets sometimes, she slips up. She lets her tiredness shows, let’s her tears leak out.
She doesn’t feel like smiling today.
Chorong lays a hand on her arm. “Don’t let them see.”
Hayoung twists her mouth into a grin. It’s painful.
+
Hayoung looks at herself in the mirror and isn’t quite sure who’s looking back.
They congratulate her, it’s a job well done.
+
Stress makes people do strange things, it wears you down, makes it too easy to slip up.
Hayoung realises this too late.
+
Namjoo brushes her teeth slowly, spits out her toothpaste, doesn't wipe her mouth straight away.
Hayoung kisses her, light and fast. It tastes like mint.
Namjoo startles. Hayoung freezes.
Watch yourself.
“I’m not-”
“I know,” Hayoung says, “I know.” She sticks her toothbrush in her mouth. Her movements are automatic now, robotic almost.
Watch yourself.
“Hayoung-”
“It was nothing.”
All Hayoung hears is be anyone but yourself.
+
Hayoung isn’t quite sure who that is anymore.
apink, hayoung-centric, 250w, g
notes: this could be something a lot bigger and a lot better but i'm a lazy asshole so. maybe i'll expand on it one day.
Watch yourself.
It’s drilled into them from day one.
Watch what you say, watch what you do, watch who you are.
They say that it’s for public image, for the good of the group.
All Hayoung hears is be anyone but yourself.
+
It’s too easy to actually listen to them, to read out the scripts they hand her, to sing out the lines they give her, to sit stock-still while they dress her up and cover her in make-up and tell her how to move.
It’s too easy to smile when they tell her to smile and break when they tell her to break.
+
She forgets sometimes, she slips up. She lets her tiredness shows, let’s her tears leak out.
She doesn’t feel like smiling today.
Chorong lays a hand on her arm. “Don’t let them see.”
Hayoung twists her mouth into a grin. It’s painful.
+
Hayoung looks at herself in the mirror and isn’t quite sure who’s looking back.
They congratulate her, it’s a job well done.
+
Stress makes people do strange things, it wears you down, makes it too easy to slip up.
Hayoung realises this too late.
+
Namjoo brushes her teeth slowly, spits out her toothpaste, doesn't wipe her mouth straight away.
Hayoung kisses her, light and fast. It tastes like mint.
Namjoo startles. Hayoung freezes.
Watch yourself.
“I’m not-”
“I know,” Hayoung says, “I know.” She sticks her toothbrush in her mouth. Her movements are automatic now, robotic almost.
Watch yourself.
“Hayoung-”
“It was nothing.”
All Hayoung hears is be anyone but yourself.
+
Hayoung isn’t quite sure who that is anymore.