I don't really have a subject

[ses123116]

I try to be what most people consider *good* Though I find it rather difficult sometimes to what is good. Its almost like it goes against my nature. I'm attracted to trouble, and it always seems to find me, despite my good intentions. Its almost like a curse. So many, misdeeds have been wrought by my hand. Its almost seems impossible that any good

Comments

You ^_^

[gray_ghost710]

Yes doing *good* is not always easy, being diligent about our actions is the only way we can make sure we do what is right, because it is very easy to fall back on our more... "primal desires" and what not as you have said that pertain to you. As you say, its "like a curse", perhaps it may be karma that you continue to battle against. It can explain why you have such a hard time doing *good* because you have created in this life, and perhaps in previous lives negative karma. And that is what is weighing you down and making it hard. We all have our allotment to deal with in life and again create more or less. You have to deal with what you are given and what you make. And from there make the best of it. You say "My inner thoughts and desires aren’t all that complicated, or different from what most people want. But again, they seem to elude me." You know what your thoughts and desires are and as you say aren’t all that complicated or different form what most people want. So you have to ask yourself why do they elude me? What is it that prevents you from having what you want? See the problem and do something about it. "Knowing is half the battle." Everyone deserves happiness, even you. Perhaps you were among the "soulless" but as you said pieces have come back to you and you can continue to bring them back by continuous diligence. *Humph* of course its hard and painful, but such is life! We can hide from it, just because we do does not make the problems go away it only creates more. Just remember the important difference between regret and gilt. Gilt is the brooding over something that you shouldn’t have done. But regret can be a powerful ally. Regret means you recognize something that you have done wrong and now can act upon it to not make the same mistake; after all we are only human. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could relate to someone? How wonderful it could truly be to be understood completely by people. But you know, who is ever truly understood completely? People may think they "know" a person, but that does not matter. You know you! You are your greatest ally because you know all about you and know what it takes to get things done. Adversely you are your greatest enemy! Because you know your weaknesses and shortcomings and will try to make yourself fall. But you are stronger than this view! Become your own ally in this fight and win! I will talk with you about this more (happiness) but now I need to sleep and meditate. Goodnight my friend.

Re: You ^_^

[gray_ghost710]

Do not pursue the past.
Do not lose yourself in the future.
The past no longer is.
The future has not yet come.
Looking deeply at life as it is.
In the very here and now, the practitioner dwells in stability and freedom.
We must be diligent today.
To wait until tomorrow is too late.
Death comes unexpectedly.
How can we bargain with it?

~Bhaddekaratta Sutta

Re: You ^_^

[gray_ghost710]

Your worst enemy cannot harm you as muchas your own unguarded thoughts.

~The Buddha

Re: You ^_^

[gray_ghost710]

The greatest achievement is selflessness.
The greatest worth is self-mastery.
The greatest quality is seeking to serve others.
The greatest precept is continual awareness.
The greatest medicine is the emptiness of everything.
The greatest action is not conforming with the worlds ways.
The greatest magic is transmuting the passions.
The greatest generosity is non-attachment.
The greatest goodness is a peaceful mind.
The greatest patience is humility.
The greatest effort is not concerned with results.
The greatest meditation is a mind that lets go.
The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances.

~Atisha

Re: You ^_^

[gray_ghost710]

If you have questions please ask ^__^